Underground Luigi Fanclub With Starlll and Josh
by Sir Starlll
Summary: Luigi deserves some spotlight! So, me and my friend decided to give it to him! Read this collection of one-shots written by the two funniest guys on F.F.! And just who is Jason? Hey, don't read something else! Get back here! I mean it! 100 REVIEWS!
1. Chapter 1

Welcome to the Underground Luigi Fan-club!!

_**Hooray For Luigi!!**_

/

Disclaimer: I don't own Mario (Yay), or Luigi (Sadly). Josh is my friend, and I wrote the oneshot. The few paragraphs of "The Plumber's Brother" were written by Josh.

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Starlll: Wow. You actually fell for my jedi mind control trick- I mean, welcome to the Underground Luigi Fan-club!! Now, I just need a well-dressed, good-looking, awesome, Luigi loving co-host.

Josh: (Starlll's 12-year-old friend) (Bursts through the door) It's a-me!! Josh-a!

Starlll: Fine- you're two of those four things. Okay, so as you read in the summary, each chapter (We're going to make about ten-ish) will have a one-shot of Luigi, a conversation about him, and recommend a story about the best green hat-wearing, high-jumping, Mansion-winning, tennis-playing, baseball star-ing, partying, ghost-busting-

Josh: (Starts singing the theme song to "Ghost Busters".)

Starlll: -Italian dude!

Josh: Okay, so now we just need a guest star.

(Starlll's older sister walks into the room.)

Starlll: LAUREN!! Sit down!

Lauren: Why?

Starlll: We're having a meeting on Fanfiction!

Lauren: Okay… (Sits down)

Josh: Okay, now just talk to the camera.

Lauren: What camera?

Josh: We're just pretending that T.V. screen is a camera.

Lauren: Now what's the point of this exactly?

Starlll: Just answer our questions and then you can leave. Now, what made you join the Luigi Fan-club?

Lauren: I didn't join anything.

Josh: Why do you like Luigi better than Mario?

Lauren: I really don't like either of them much- just the game 'Super Mario-

Starlll: Next question! Have you ever had a dream of Luigi?

Lauren: No. Not that I can remember.

Josh: Well, you're probably one of the most boring people we've interviewed.

Lauren: Goodbye, then. (Walks away.)

Starlll: Time for a one-shot?

Josh: Okay.

____________One-shot time!! (This won't be in script form)____________

"So, Luigi, do you want to enter the mansion and save your brother?" Professor E. Gadd asked, offering him the Poltergeist 3, 0 0 0.

The man in green didn't answer right away.

_If I was the one trapped in that mansion, Mario would go save me._ Luigi thought. _But he'd probably get a few of his old friends first. Like Kooper or Madame Flurry. I don't think I have time to get any of my buddies from that time I went to save Princess Éclair._

_Maybe I should just call the ghost busters. _

Then his adventurous side- the side which many thought was nonexistent- came out.

_No! This is finally _my_ turn to win! My turn to save the day! I'm going to do this. I'm going to save my only brother! I don't care if it's full of ghosts! I'm gonna-_

"Luigi? You've been silent for almost five minutes. Are you okay?" Prof. E. Gadd asked.

"I'll do it." Luigi said, taking the ghost-vacuum. "He's my brother, and that's my mansion."

Then the man in green hiked up to the literally haunted mansion and faced his greatest fear. Ghosts.

/

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Josh: Why was it so short?

Starlll: Shut up.

Josh: But I just-

Starlll: Shut up.

Josh: Fine. See if I tell you where Sue Pea is! (Luigi's mansion)

Starlll: The key is in the sealed room, which has a passage there to the right of the roof. I already caught her.

Josh: Well, see if I ever lend you my copy of L.'s Mansion again!

Starlll: Okay- I'm sorry.

Josh: Good. Hey, can I put up that thing I wrote?

Starlll: Sure!

_THE_

_PLUMER'S_

_BROTHER! _

_Mario, the give me a break, everyone knows Luigi deserves the spotlight _

_A lot more then the fat luxurious Luigi can shoot fireballs faster, farther, and stronger then Mario, Luigi can jump higher and farther then Mario, and Luigi went through a 5 floor mansion just to save his trapped older brother. I mean if that was Luigi trapped in the mansion, Mario would just sit back drinking lemonade while he calls the Ghost Busters and lets them do the work for him even though his own brother is inside.I don't know about you, but for me that spells bad the latest game Super Smash Brothers Brawl, Luigi is fast, tall, and can KO any character fast with his super jump Luigi's final smash: negative zone increases at lighting speed, knocks any character out cold, and Luigi gets to do a awesome dance. _

Starlll: Well, I'm aware of how short this is, but I'm going to have to end it here.

Both: Go Luigi!!

/

Notice: If you want to either join the Luigi Fan-club, add your name to the very short list:

The List of members:

1) Starlll

2) Josh

3) Nick

4) Shane.

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Another note: For those of you who are fans of Sci-Phy or His Name is Mudd, I know I told you my computer broke. It did. I made this as a thing to do when my mom forces me to the library. I can write this in like, two minutes. So, for the next 2+ weeks, this will be the only thing updated.


	2. Curse of the King's Crown

Notes: Wait- you're actually still reading this?! WOW!! That is amazing!! Uh… I mean… uh… welcome to stage two of the Luigi Fan-club! (The word 'Fan-club' echoes throughout the room.

/

Josh: (Hears the word 'Fan-club' echo) What was that?

Starlll: I'm guessing it was my fairy. (Pulls a fairy inside a glass bottle (Like the one from legend of Zelda.) out of his pocket.) I named her Flippy!

Flippy the fairy: Hey! (Flies around a newcomer's face.) Look!

Nintendo64: (Starlll's friend.) (Bites the fairy)

Flippy: Hey!

Starlll: Exactly! That's my fairy!

Nintendo64: (Wraps up the fairy) Here! (Gives the wrapped up fairy to Starlll as a present)

Josh: Sit down. (Nintendo64 sits down) Who do you like better Luigi or Mario?

Nintendo: Mario.

Starlll: I'll give you 5 bucks to say Luigi.

Nintendo: Mario.

Starlll: You stink. Have you ever beaten Luigi's Mansion?

Nintendo: I just got past the twins.

Josh: If you met Luigi, what would you ask him?

Nintendo: (Answering) Where's Mario?

Starlll: Uh… nowhere you can prove.

Josh: What's your opinion on Super Smash bros. Brawl?

Nintendo: It's a lot better.

Starlll: Who's your best character?

Nintendo: Fox.

Josh: Who the heck invited this guy on our show?!

Nintendo: No one you can prove.

Starlll: Who was your favorite ghost in Luigi's Mansion?

Nintendo: That purple dude in the graveyard.

Starlll: Bogmire? He rocks!!

Josh: Who would win in a fight? Luigi, or Toad?

Nintendo: Toad. In the one game he was playable in, he was the best.

Starlll: What is your opinion on the fact that Mario can't stand to be touched? Even if a goomba walks by, he freaks out.

Nintendo: That is 100% true.

Josh: Did you know that Mario is a drug addict, and is more of a miser than Scrooge!

Nintendo: WHAT?!?!

Starlll: On super Mario sunshine, he needed money to live (Especially if he didn't have his hat), and on SM64, underwater he needed it to _breath_! A-a-a-a-a-and, he's consistently eating mushrooms-then he grows! Gee, why do you think that is?

Nintendo: I guess…

Starlll: And, if you're one of the people that think that Mario and Peach are married/dating, because of super smash bros., Mario is a wife/girlfriend beater/princess attacker person!

Nintendo: I guess…

Starlll: And… did you know that Mario can't keep a job?

Nintendo: Huh?

Starlll: In the first game with "Mario" in it, he was a carpenter named 'Jumpman'. Then, he became a plumber, then a kart racer (Mario kart), baseball player (Super Mario sluggers), party planner(Mario party), civic duty cleaner person (Super Mario Sunshine), and, my personal favorite: An astronaut (Super Mario Galaxy)!

Nintendo: Well… Luigi is afrai of ghosts!

Josh: That's a common phobia. And besides, he faced his fear.

Nintendo: Well, can I say a few good things about Mario?

Both: Sure.

Nintendo: Really?

Both: Yes. Just visit the underground Mario fan-club.

Josh: Oh, wait! That doesn't exist!

Nintendo: Goodbye.

Starlll: Laters, buddy!

Josh: Bye.

Nintendo: But can I just say-

(Nobody is listening)

Flippy the fairy: Hey! Listen!

(Everybody is listening to Nintendo.)

Nintendo: Thank you, Flippy. Everybody who is reading, check out my stories. My screen name is Nintendo64, and I like reviews.

Starlll: Goodbye, now.

Nintendo64: Bye.

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Oneshot Time:

/

Name: The Curse of the King's Crown

Timeline: About 2 days after the 'Luigi's mansion' affair.

Oh, and: This was written in Luigi's diary.

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Date: **

Feeling: Powerful.

/

Okay, get this. I was just minding my own business, eating a bowl of Koopa Crunchies (They're Gr-r-r-r-r-r-r-eat!), when my rude old brother, Mario just walked up to me and spat out:

"I still can't believe you took so long to find me!"

We were staying in the new mansion that a few of the portrait ghosts built for me. They agreed to build it for me as long as we promised to let them live in the old, haunted mansion (and never leave), and I'd never visit.

These ghosts included:

Neville the book reader, Lydia, Mr. Luggs, Spooky the dog, The Floating Whirlwindas, Biff Atlas the bodybuilder, Sir Weston, and Melody. Sweet, sweet Melody. I mean… uh… please ignore that last part.

Anyway, when I asked Mario what he meant, he told me that he was probably standing there, staring into the face of the most horrifying ghost in the afterlife, for days.

When I told him that it was just a few hours, and that it only lasted one night _(And that Bogmire was probably the scariest ghost)_. Then, Mario, the Mario that everybody knows and loves, punched me in the gut.

"What was that for?!" I yelled.

"For back talking to me like that!" Mario always thought that he deserved more respect than anyone else. He probably did. But when I'm the only one in the room with him, he takes off his polite mask, and acts like he was a King. "You think that you SO0O0O good, just because you saved me. You're not. I could probably do that in seconds. And what's with **this**?!" Mario picked up the crown I took from King boo after I caught him. "Do you see me taking souvenirs whenever I stomp on a goomba? Did I take that cork from Gooper Blooper? No! Did I take a leaf from Petey Piranha? No!"

I could tell Mario wanted to break something. Something expensive. Like the crown in his hand.

"Now get some respect, and lose this crown!"

I got that boost of adrenaline. You ever hear the expression "A mother can lift a car, as long as her baby is under it"? Well, that crown is my baby. It was the only bit of proof that I actually did go on that adventure, and didn't go delusional.

I completely threw my body at the man in red, who I'm occasionally ashamed to call my brother, and pinned him to the ground. I held the ruby red crown up to his face, and said:

"Sometimes I just wish I could lock you up and not let you out until you actually are nice to me!"

Now, here's the amazing part: A ghost rose out of the crown, like a Genie.

She (I'm guessing it's a she.) looked strikingly like the old ghost "Madame Clairvoya", although, she had a short green dress, short hair, and instead of the old, dusty way of speaking (and overall, aura) Madame Clairvoya had, it was more of a sparkling way of acting-which was probably the affect of living in a ruby crown. She never told me her name, so I decided to name her "Madame Ayovrialc", because she was the exact opposite of Madame Clairvoya. (If you don't understand, look at how the names are spelled.)

And, I will never forget what she said:

"You made a wish, now I shall grant it. But _Caveat emptor_(1), you must be careful what you wish for, because… well, you know." And then four things happened:

1) Madame Ayovrialc disappeared back into the crown.

2) Lightning struck the house, blowing out the lights (again)

3) Mario was gone. _Again_.

4) I had to get to the breaker room to get the lights back on. **Again**.

Well, actually, that last one was easy, and it took me about ten seconds afterwards to understand what had happened.

My wish came true. Mario was trapped inside King Boo's crown until I deemed him worthy to come back out.

I have a feeling that this is gonna be fun.

Well, it was getting late, so I put the crown on the desk next to my bed, and thought of ideas for what he should have to go through until the red plumber could come back out until I feel asleep.

I know I just said it, but Mamma mea, this is gonna be fun.

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(1) _Caveat emptor _is Latin for the phrase "Buyer Beware".

_/_

Josh: Was that a one-shot?

Starlll: Well, it's actually going to be a two-shot. Maybe a three-shot. Hmm…

Josh: Anyway, out of the ten ideas you had, this must be my favorite one.

Starlll: Why didn't you tell me? We should have saved it for later! Answer me!

Josh: I dunnno.

Starlll: Good enough for me!

(Moment of silence.)

Josh: So, what do we talk about now?

Starlll: Well, we're supposed to have a conversation about the story.

Josh: I don't think I want to do that.

Starlll: But we have to!

Josh: I thought this was a free country!

Starlll: No, it's not. You ever hear of having to get a green card?

Josh: No.

(Moment of silence)

Starlll: Wanna play brawl?

Josh: Yeah! 5 stock, no items!

Starlll: Hyrule temple, Marth (Me) against you!

Josh: Yeah!

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Members:

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

/

A/N

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By the way, sorry if your name wasn't on the list. I really do apologize. Okay, I sort of apologize.


	3. Curse of the King's Crown 2

Notes: Well, if you're still reading this, then you A) really are falling for my jedi Mind control, OR B) You just like Luigi, not me. Sniff. Sniff.

/

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own any portrait ghosts, Luigi, Luigi's mansion, or Mario. Well, I'm glad about that last part-Mario is just a money grubbing plumber. They all belong to Nintendo. Also, all the names on the list belong to themselves. Unless they're slaves, but…

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Starlll: (Playing Super Smash bros. Brawl) (Playing as Marth) Okay… come on… come on…

Josh: (Playing as Power suite Samus) Come on… come on… (Charges up his Laser) (Imitating Lamp from Smashtasm (Which I don't own)) I'm-a chargin' up my Laser!

Starlll: (Jumps in front of Josh)

Josh: (Imitating Lamp from Smashtasm (Which I don't own)) I'm, a-firin' my Laser!

(Starlll uses counter, and blows Josh off the stage.)

Starlll: Oh! OH!! WHAT NOW!?! WHAT NOW, WHAT NOW, KID!?!?!?! PWND!!

Josh: You're mean.

Starlll: Only when I want to be.

Josh: Just… go write the next chapter.

Starlll: Who are you, my boss?

Josh: Write it our you're fired!

Starlll: Go ahead, try. You can't fire me- I don't work for you. I write all the chapters. I got dozens of people to check it out in the first day it was up. And I know the password. You don't.

Josh: Fine, we both own half.

Starlll: Why not. The other 50% sounds like too much work.

(Moment of Silence)

Starlll: Oh, fine. I'll write it. But YOU need to find the guest star for this episode.

Josh: Easy as beating Mario!

Starlll: Ooh! Mario burn!

Josh: High-five me broth-ah! What wit' da' Mario hard-core burning smack talk, and 'dat ice cold cool-ness of mine-

Starlll: (Looks at him)Josh.

Josh: Too carried away? Sorry.

______________________________One Shot Time!_____________________________

Title: The Curse of the King's Crown, part 2!

(Does this take some shine off the first one?)

Note: This was written in Luigi's diary, because, well let's face it: fan or foe-we just love reading Luigi's diary.

Month: #*

Day: x*

Okay, so I just got Mario trapped inside King Boo's crown, and now I get to do anything I want. I really am going to have some fun.

"Okay, Mario… the first thing I want you to do is scrub the floor of the entire mansion, then all of E. Gadd's house.

Then, what looked like a ghost of Mario rose out of the crown. He looked like he normally did, although he was _transparent_.

"What's this supposed to teach me?!" He asked.

"Humility, hopefully."

"Yeah, good luck with that, kid."

So, I had Mario get on his knees and scrub the floor of the entire mansion, followed by E. Gadd's place. I really hoped he'd learn something.

No dice.

So, I made him clean out the toilet.

He came out with two coins, and a Koopa shell. The Koopa shell gave me an idea, though!

-----------------------------Later, at Bowser's Palace: ---------------------------

"So, you're going to let me and my minions beat up Mario for the next 30 minutes, and you won't do anything about it?" Bowser asked.

"Yeah. Pretty much."

And for the next half hour, I watched Mario get beaten up by Bowser, koopas, goombas, hammer bros., hammer sis, lava bubbles, dry bones, you name it!

"Okay, okay! Time's up!" I yelled when a timer rang, and Bowser's minions gradually backed off. "Thanks for helping me try and straighten him out!"

"Hey, any time, buddy!" Bowser said, cheerfully.

While I walked away, Mario sort of dissolved, and I looked at his reflection in the crown.

"_I hate you!_" He mouthed out, unable to make noise.

I stuck my tongue at him, then fogged up the crown with my breath.

---------------------------Later, at E. Gadd's house: ------------------------------

"Okay, like I told you last night, Gadds, my brother is in here. I'm trying to teach him some manners… and punish him some. So, to show him it's not that easy, I thought maybe we could give him the Poltorgiest, and throw him through the training room a few times. Maybe we could even throw a few elements at him."

"I like the idea!"

/

Mario was humming a tune, clearly afraid, and then a pink, tall ghost appeared behind him!

He screamed and pulled out his flashlight, but it was too late. The ghost hit him. Hard.

"Oi!" He grunted as he hit the ground and landed flat on his back.

The same pink ghost breathed down his neck, and every hair on his neck and back stood up like needles.

"AIIEE-EE!!" Mario screamed at the top of his lungs when the ghost picked him up, and carried him to the ceiling.

"Help!!" The man in red yelled as he fell to the ground.

Mario was hardly conscious, and only caught five spirits!

"Okay, there are a few super shrooms in that closet over there. Go ahead and eat it before you face this next guy.

Mario dashed to the hidden closet, and crammed mushrooms in his mouth while E. Gadd explained the next ghost.

"I found this spirit one time while I was camping. I think he was made from about ten or so basic ghosts, and now he resembles Bogmire. Well, sort of. He has more of a hunch, and a gray color tone. I call him 'The Ghoul'!"

"How original." Mario muttered.

"I'm releasing him now."

"Wait! I'm not ready-"

The Ghoul hovered a few feet in front of him, and shoved his face in front of Mario's, freaking him out.

"Help me! Mommy!!"  
He started to run to the other side of the room, where he left the Poltergeist.

The Ghoul was blocking his way.

I could tell Mario knew what he had to do.

"A-a-a-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ir, Maa-a-a-a-a-a-ario-o-o-o-o!!" He yelled, jumping over the gray spirit.

---------------------------------------------later-----------------------------------

"Okay, Mario. You can come out, now."

Mario popped out of the crown, and punched me in the face.

"Okay, I'd say we're even, now."

"Wait, that's it?" I asked him, astounded.

"I've been thinking, I've been really bad to you lately. It's just, you've been the easy outlet to all my stress. I blame Peach."

"Yeah- why can't she just get some decent guards, I mean 'Oh now! An army is coming! Somebody call the plumbers'!"

We laughed together for the first time in a while.

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Starlll: And now,

Josh: We are going to have,

Boogie: Is this where I come in?

Josh: Not yet.

Boogie: Sorry. (Floats away.)

Starlll: Introducing Josh's sidekick…

Both: Boogie the boo!

(Moment of silence)

Josh: Now you come out.

Boogie: You sure?

Josh: Yes.

Starlll: I still think you should have either gotten Boo B. Hatch or Underboo. More fitting for you.

Boogie: (Flies through the wall) Everybody get down and boogie!

Starlll: So, what's the point of Boogie, again?

Boogie: Well, I can sing show tunes, and-

Starlll: (Instantly) I like him!

/

Starlll: And now,

Josh: We are going to have,

Both: A guest star!

Starlll: Okay, Josh! Who did you find as a guest star?

Josh: Here he is!

King Boo: Hi!

Starlll: One minute. (Pulls Josh aside.) (To Josh) Why did you get the one guy who hates Luigi more than anyone else?

Josh: I like King boo.

Starlll: Oh, gee, I guess that makes it okay!

Josh: Sorry!

Starlll: Hey, King Boo! Is that Luigi outside without his Poltoregiest?

King Boo: Really!?! (Flies outside, only to get locked out by Starlll's eight year old apprentice, named 'Silicon'.)

Silicon: You're welcome. (Walks away.)

Josh: Now who's our guest star?

Starlll: I had a feeling something might go wrong. So, I asked this person to come here today!

MasterofHearts: Hey.

Josh: Who's this dude?

Starlll: A guy. Okay, question number one: Who is your favorite Nintendo character?

Master of Hearts: I've always preferred Luigi. In fact, I think my love for the other  
characters is what made me not so interested in most Mario games.

Josh: Okay, have you ever had a dream of Luigi? Think hard.

Master of Hearts: I might have, once, but I don't keep a dream journal or anything, so I  
can't recall what it was about.

Starlll: What do you think started the whole Luigi x Daisy thing?

Master of Hearts: Luigi and Daisy? I think it started sometime along the lines of the Mario  
Sports series. I think most of it started off screen, seeing how Diasy is  
usually either partners with Peach or Luigi, and not Mario, even though the  
red man saved her from Tatanga before he even met Peach. I suppose I'd have to  
think about it for a while.

Starlll: Okay, who would win in a fight: Luigi, or Booligi?

Master of Hearts: Who's Bo-

Starlll: Luigi's ghost form. I thought of him like, two seconds ago.

Master of Hearts: Oh. Defiantly Luigi. Luigi. He's more talented in battle. Of course, as Boos are typically immortal, it's difficult to say. However, with the Poltergust 3000, Luigi  
definitely has the advantage.

Josh: What was your favorite Luigi's Mansion moment?

Master of Hearts: I'd have to say either when you first meet Dr. E. Gadd (funny) or when you  
fight Bogmire (my favorite ghost).

Starlll: Bogmire was my favorite, too! I liked how he can clone himself, and yet his most powerful attack is his only weakness! Ironic, huh? Anyway, what is your favorite Nintendo game?

Master of Hearts: Actually, it's a tie between the Super Smash series and Pokemon.

Josh: Okay, thank you for your time.

Starlll: Later dude.

Master of Hearts: Bye.  
Flippy the Fairy: (Master of Hearts starts to leave.) Hey!

Boogie: Wait!

Starlll: What?

(Josh isn't listening.)

Flippy: Listen!

Josh: Sorry!

Boogie: Don't you have something else to ask him?

Starlll: Oh yeah! Do you want any of your stories advertised?

Master of Hands: Yeah! Could you advertise Waluigi the Master Thief? It's my only real Mario story. Oh, and The Legend of Ruto: Child of Darkness. No one seems to have paid attention to it  
for a while.

Starlll: Okay. Boogie, P-jips! Silicon! (Snaps his fingers to a beat.) Five-six-seven-eight!

(P-jips (My O.C. That can only talk in rhymes.) Silicon (My eight-year-old apprentice) and Boogie are wearing suites while singing)

All: Check out M.O.H.'s story(s),

And give him all that glory!

Waluigi the master thief,

gives rich people grief!

And the legend of Ruto,

The good ratings for it aren't low!

now just read it! Go!

Master of Hearts: Thanks...

Starlll: You're welcome.

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The List!:

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

Riku's Music Lover

Mr. Green man

AvnVKai

DimentioFreak

ThaFanned

Solaris Primed


	4. High School Times

(Josh and Starlll are playing Marvel Nemesis, Rise of The Imperfects)

Starlll: (Playing as 'The Thing') A classic. (Punches Josh's character with force.)

Josh: (Playing as 'The Wink') Yeah. Wink vs Thing. (Teleports behind Starlll's character then stabs him.)

Starlll: Okay, now that is just rude!  
Josh: Yeah, but it gets the job done.

Starlll: I know, but still, common curtsy, dude. You don't use tele-powers on a really slow dude. It's like that attack that Storm does where she grabs you from halfway across the stage.

Josh: Yeah...

Starlll: You wanna do the next chapter?

Josh: Sure. You do the disclaimer.

/

Disclaimer: I don't own Mario, Luigi, Toad, Peach, Daisy, or any Nintendo/Mario characters- or any of the people/games Josh and I were playing before the disclaimer. I also don't own the song that ____ sings during the one-shot.

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High-School days:

Note: Due to the fan's asking (Okay, it was just one fan.), I decided to make a DaisyxLuigi.

/

A brief explanation:

The 'Mario' Gang (Toad, Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy.) Are basically the group of 'Losers'.

Mario and Peach are dating.

Toad is gay.

Luigi is the pale-faced nerd who has had a crush on Daisy since she first moved to that area of the mushroom kingdom.

Daisy is an athlete who just moved in town a few months ago.

\

"Hey bro." Mario said, sitting next to Luigi on the benches surrounding the track outside the school's field.

"Hey Mario."

"You watching Daisy?" Mario asked.

"Huh?"  
"Okay, the only person who doesn't know you have a crush on Daisy _is_ Daisy."

"That's not true!" Luigi defended quickly. "Daisy is just my friend. I came here to be supportive because she was a bit nervous on making the soccer team- is it that obvious?"

"Yeah. So when are you going to make your move?"  
"Excuse me?"  
"When are you going to ask her on a date?"

"I don't know..."

"I could ask her for you. You know, be an ambassador." Mario offered.

"Nah. I think I'll do it a different way..."

"Okay. Good luck, man."  
The man in red got up and walked away.

/

One week later:

\

It was the second week of the new year of high school.

Daisy was practicing soccer with her team, and there weren't many people in the bleachers. The school marching band was getting their instruments ready for some reason.

Toad was the lead dude in the band, and setting up his tuba.

Daisy kicked the soccer ball through the net, and as she turned around, she saw Luigi with something in his hand.

"What in the world..."

Then music slowly flooded out of the speakers.

"You're just too good to be true  
Can't take my eyes off you  
You'd be like heaven to touch  
I wanna hold you so much  
At long last love has arrived  
And I thank God I'm alive  
You're just too good to be true  
Can't take my eyes off you

Furdon the way that I stare  
There's nothing else to compare  
The sight of you leaves me weak  
There are no words left to speak  
But if you feel like I feel  
Please let me know that it's real  
You're just too good to be true  
Can't take my eyes off you" Luigi sang. It was sort of a quiet, sweet tone.

Then, Toad and the rest of the school band started playing their instruments to an entirely different faster tempo. It was amazing.  
The Green Man pointed to Daisy.  
"I love you baby  
And if it's quite all right  
I need you baby  
To warm my lonely night

I love you baby  
Trust in me when I say  
Oh, pretty baby  
Don't bring me down I pray oh, pretty baby  
Now that I found you, stay and let me love you  
Baby-" Luigi was cut off by two rent-a-cops. "Aw shoot."

He evaded the two cops by running through the bleachers, and he waved goodbye to the band and everyone else.

/

The next day at school, the story on how Luigi got up and sang to Daisy and then ran away from the cops spread like wildfire.

Also, that was the day Daisy was out sick.

"She probably just took a day off to think about what just happened." Toad suggested. "I mean, you did just-"  
"I know what I did. But still, I really don't know whether I should go to her house or just give her some space."

The two were sitting down eating lunch. Most people were staring at Luigi.

"Give her space." Toad suggested.

Then they heard a voice from across the hall.

"Get out of my way, idiot!"  
Rosaline (The most popular girl in school) (I know I misspelled her name.) was shoving a girl out of the way in the line.

"Girls like that really get my goat." Toad muttered. He got up and and said to Rosaline:

"What gives you the right to cut in front of her? She was there first!"

"Well, I'm called the princess of this school. So what I say goes."  
"Yeah? Well kids call me the queen of England. I outrank you _bitch_."

Rosaline gaped in shock.

"What did you just call me?!"

"You heard me, girlfriend!"

\

It was the rise of the nerds. Luigi had the guts to sing in front of the school, Daisy was lead of the soccer team, Mario got a well paying job, so he was rich by high school standards, and Toad openly insulted Rosaline!

It was two days later, before school, though, that Luigi finally got a chance to talk to Daisy.

"Hey." She breathed.

"Hey. I was thinking, maybe we got go out for dinner? You know, movie, food, etc.?"

In return, she kissed him.

"I like that answer."

/

Josh: I still don't understand why you couldn't write action or comedy instead of romance.

Starlll: Excuse me for trying to entertain all audiences.

Josh: No, I don't think I will.

Flippy: Hey!

Josh: You're right, Flippy. I'm sorry, Starlll. That was very rude of me.

Starlll: It's okay.

(Moment of silence.)

Mr. Green Man: Hi!

Starlll: Hey, MGM, welcome to the story.

Josh: You're our guest star?

Mr. Green Man: (Sarcastically) No, I'm your gardener.

Josh: Sorry.

Starlll: Okay, question time: Have you ever liked a character more than Luigi?

MGM: No, Captain Falcon has come close but Luigi is always number 1 for me.

Josh: Where do you think the whole Daisy+Luigi thing started?

MGM: It was probably the NES Golf tournament, where she caddied for him.

Starlll: Mr. G Man- can I call you Mr. G Man?

Mr. Green Man: Sure.

Starlll: Mr. G Man, who would win in a fight, Toad or Luigi?

Mr. Green Man: Luigi,obviously. Aside from SMB2 and NSMB2 Toad is useless.

Josh: Who in the Mushroom Kingdom do you think is closest to Luigi?

Mr. Green Man: In the Kingdom? I was going to say Yoshi or Rosalina so, maybe Professor E.  
Gadd, if he lives there.

Starlll: What was your favorite Luigi's Mansion moment?

Mr. Green Man: The part where I got to fight King Boo Bowser corpse thingy.

Josh: Do you want any of your stories advertised?

Mr. Green Man: Luigi's Last Business attempt the most, Animals will probably be built up  
more and more, and PrankTV is doing fine. If you can do two I would pick  
Animals and LLBA. But only one would be Business attempt.

Starlll: You heard the man- "**READ LUIGI'S LAST BUISNESS ATTEMPT" AND "ANIMALS"!!!** Will that work?  
Mr. Green Man: Okay...

Josh: Do you have any suggestions or ideas on what we should do differently?

Mr. Green Man: I'm perfectly fine with how you are running it, unless you're out of ideas.  
Cause I'm out of steam too.

Starlll: No, I still have plenty of ideas. Okay, thank you for your time, Mr. G Man!

Mr. Green Man: You're welcome.

\

Da' List:

(Oh, and Solaris, I misspelled you name in the last chapter, so you're no. 1 on the list. I'm awesome like that.)

/

1. Solaris Prime

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. MasterofHearts1313

NinetailsGirl09


	5. The Comet

A/N

Starlll: (Playing Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon on his DS) Yeah, Frey! Beat the heck outta' that Gra! Jagen, take down that cavalier with your Ridersbane! Wait- Caeda no! I didn't see that archer!! (A Gra bowman shoots down Caeda and kills her.) NO!! **NONONONONONONONONONONONO**!! !! NO!! I DON'T BELIVE IT!!

Josh: What?!?

Starlll: (Restarting his DS) Caeda died. She was a Pegaknight, and then some idiot shot her out of the sky!

Josh: What game are you playing?

Starlll: Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon. Normally I don't react so strongly, but she was my _only_ Pegaknight. And she has this awesome lance that does a ton of damage to armored/horse-riding enemies. That's really the only reason why she's still alive though (along with the fact that she can cover a ton of ground on the field). I mean, at first she was okay, but then she makes this guy betray his own country by toying with his heart, and now she's showing no interest in him, so I really hate her now.

Josh: I stopped paying attention around the time you said 'an awesome lance'.

Starlll: Yeah, I know, I know- you have a short attention span.

Josh: That's me.

(Moment of silence)

Starlll: So, I have an idea for the one-shots. (Whispers to Josh.)

Josh: I like that idea... sorta. Kinda'...

(Suddenly, a man dressed exactly like Starlll, but with a different mask enters the room through a time warp.)

Starlll, from a few days in the future: I am here from the furture just to apologize for how it gets a bit boring/not interesting/bad near the end of the oneshot, but the one-shot was needed so that I could... well, I'll just leave that to be a surprise. By the way, Starlll from the past, nice mask!

Starlll: Thanks, man! How did you learn to get back in time, though?

Starlll, from a few days in the future: There's a very simple answer to that: (Leaves in a time warp.)

Starlll: I'll do the disclaimer.

/

Disclaimer: I don't own Peach, Mario, Luigi (Sadly), or any and all related characters. They belong to Nintendo. I don't own Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon, either. I own a copy of the game, and recommend it to everyone. Great game.

Oh yea, and I don't own the idea on one-shot no. 1. It belongs to a guy/guy-ette who sent a review to Nintendo Power- my favorite magazine.

\

Peach's Dark Secret:

/

"Hey, Toadsworth, I need a moment to make a call. Can you and the two guards leave the room?"  
"Why?"  
"I just told you. I need to make a call. Confidential."

Toadsworth and the two guards with spears left, the old Toad muttering:

"Confidential my mushroom. Even though I'm the advisor, I don't get to listen in on anything..."

When they closed the door, Peach picked up her cell phone and dialed a strange number.

"Hey, Bowser," She said in a hushed voice. "Do you think you can kidnap me around noon next Thursday? There's about to be a dance, and I really hate giving that whole speech and such."

The giant fire-breathing Koopa grunted over the phone.

"Fine, but I have to tell you, I'm really getting sick of these 'Bowser loves Peach' rumors. I mean, you're _human_. I'm a koopa. It would be like a monkey and a turtle."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just, I'll send you the money. About ten thousand coins, right?"  
"Oh, no. Every third time is free, remember?"  
"Thanks. So, what's your plan this time? I'll be on the balcony, as always."

"I think I'll just wing it- I mean, what's the worst that can happen? My giant hover-kart will get hit by a tiny javelin?"

"Don't insult my guards. Your main force it GOOMBAS. What do those do? Walk?"

"Shut up."

\

Later, at Bowser's place:

/

Peach laid back in the large hot tub she paid Bowser to install.

_A few days from now, Bowser will pretend to get beat up by Mario, he'll get a reward and a story. It's not like Bowser's guards hurt him that much. I'm surprised nobody on the throne before me ever thought of this. Just pay Bowser to kidnap me for a few days, and I get to miss out on all those boring meetings for a while._

And that's what happened.

Bowser pretended to get hurt when Mario,

Mario got rewarded,

Peach got a vacation,

Bowser would have gotten paid if it weren't for his 'third time for free' rule.

And nobody asked any questions-aside from the reporters. But still, pictures of her on the beach would be all over the paper anyways.

That is Peach's dark secret.

\

/

And now for the Luigi one-shot:

\

Genre: (Which I thought of _completely_ by myself) Action/Adventure

/

Luigi, Mario, Toad (who isn't gay in the one-shot), Daisy (Who is sort of Luigi's girlfriend, but they really aren't official or anything yet.), and Peach were playing cards.

"You know what annoys me?" Asked Mario.

"No, but I bet you're going to tell us." Luigi said, annoyed.

"Shut up."  
"No you shut up."  
"No, I swear, I am going to rip your arms off-"

"Qwerty!" Toad yelled.

Both brothers looked at him.

"What does that mean?"  
"I don't know, but it got you two to stop yelling."  
"You know what ticks _me_ off?" Peach asked.

"What?"  
"The reoccurring damsel-in-distress theme. I mean, Legend of Zelda, Rapunzel, Daisy and I had our fair share, I mean, it was okay for a moment I guess, but now it's just sexist."  
The people around the table nodded, and then Luigi pushed forward all of his gambling chips on the table.

"I'm all in."

Then Toad slapped down his entire hand of cards.

"Gin."

"Wait, I thought we were playing B.S.!" Mario stated, surprised.

"No, we were playing Blackjack."

"No, it was Hearts. And how could you think we were playing B.S.? That's a drinking game."  
"I thought we were playing dry!"

There was a moment of silence.

Everybody stood up.

"Well, it's getting late, I'd better get going."  
"Yeah, I gotta go make/eat dinner."

"I'll walk you home."  
"I need to wax my mushroom."

"And I can't leave because this is my house." Luigi said sitting down.

---------------------------------------Later, with Luigi-----------------------------------------------------------------

_Dear Diary,_

_I'm still wondering whether or not to write that letter to the LOZ company to make a 'Legend of Zelda: The Heroine'. I mean, it would be interesting to see the 'hero' reborn as a girl... but then would we be seeing a Price Zelda? Hm... deals off._

_So, I just have some weird feeling that the author that we all worship is just babbling about, no idea where it's going._

_I bet that some guy is going to be running into my room and tell me that a new guy is trying to take over the world or something._

_I wonder if Daisy-_

"Luigi!! The author is going to write a one-shot because we have to recover a weird meteor from Bowser!!" Mario called down. "I think Toadsworth mentioned something about an airship and we'd need to figure out a way up to the sky, I really wasn't listening. Just get packed up and ready for tomorrow."  
"I know the drill, save the princess, yadda yadda yadda."

"No, not Peach, a meteor."

"Did it hit the planet?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Then it's a meteorite. Not a meteor."

"Oh."

"Hey, you want me to warm up some pasta?"

"Nah, I'm not that hungry."

--------------------------------------------------------The Next Day---------------------------------------------------

"Okay, here's the plan." Toadsworth said, holding up a chalk board. "Now, Mario and Luigi, you're going to go through the main doors and completely tear up the place, fighting off as many koopas, goombas, Hammer bros., be prepared to have to fend off some of the elites. Now, Peach and Daisy, you two are going to crawl through the ventilation shaft thingy in the back. Of course, you won't be going in those dresses, you'll be wearing your outfits from the last racing event (Mario Kart Wii). Any questions?"  
"Yeah," Toad started. "How will will get up to-"

"None? Good, then. Pip pip, get ready."

"But how will we get up-"

\

Later, that very same day:

/

"Oh, that's how."  
"Okay, you heard Toadsworth: go!" Mario shouted.

"Hey! You!!" A Koopa shouted, seeing Mario and Luigi. "Get 'em, guys!"

The koopas charged at a pace of 2 miles per hour at the two plumbers.

"You know, I seriously question making an army of turtles."

"Agreed."

The red and green men jumped on top of goomba after koopa after hammer bro. Mario shot out a few fireballs, and Luigi jumped up high to take out the lakitus from the sky.  
It really wasn't much of a fight until the "Disposables" as Bowser calls them, were down for the count.

Because that's when Kammy Koopa (The one from Paper Mario TTYD and Paper Mario 64) came in on her broomstick.

"Dang nab you kids! I'm gonna fry you like a blooper!" And then the purple-wearing-magikoopa shot out random spells. "Dry corpus! Dry corpus! Skelekin!"

Each one landed over a yard away from them.

"If that's as good as her aim is, I'd say we're going to be okay."

"Actually, I don't think she was aiming for us..." Luigi said, and pointed to the ground.

"Oh, now that's just not fair!"  
Two Dry Bones climbed out from where Kammy shot her spells.

"Okay, you take care of the Bones, I'll jump and attack _Clammy_ Koopa." Luigi said, and dived into the air like one would swim in water.

"Okay, let's see what your dusty old bones can do!" Mario shouted, pulling out his hammer (PM TTYD) and smashing them to bits. But no matter how many times he hit them, kicked them, or even stepped on them, the kept regenerating and getting back up.

"Okay, let's see how you guys like AIR TRAVEL!!" Mario smashed one Dry Bones (I'll call him Kenny), and wrestled the other zombie (I'll name him Benny) over the edge of the air ship.

When Kenny regenerated, he stayed far from the edge, and broke Mario's hold over him repeatedly.

"Okay, then looks like I'm going to have to bring on the pain! I got this from my last Super Smash Bros. Tournament!"

Mario used his massive attack, the Mario Finale, and blew Kenny over the edge with extreme raw power.

Mario whistled.

"Alright, I took down Kammy. You ready?" Luigi asked, holding up Kammy's old wand.

"Yeah. I wonder what happened to Toad."

"Huh?"  
"Where's Toad?"  
"I don't know."

"Well, he'll survive."

\

Daisy and Peach were crawling through the vents.

"So, what's up with you and Luigi?"  
"What do you mean?"

"Well, it's always been a bit awkward between you two, but now it's just weird."

"No it's not."

"Is to."  
"Is not."

"Is to- wait, what's that?" Peach asked, and listened to the edge of the vent.

"What's this?"  
"Why, they appear to be fossils."  
"But how is that possible?"  
"I don't know. What am I, a magikoopa?"  
"What do you think they're talking about?" Peach whispered.

"I don't know. Let's keep going."

The two princesses continued to crawl along the shaft until they found a way down.

"Wait- Spiny!" Peach called, pointing to a 4-legged red-spike-shelled bug-thingy crawling around. "What a pain. I can't reach any of my bat/tennis racket/golf club/bad mitten rackets."

"Where do you keep all of that?"  
"Long story. Just, see if you can hand me my golf club."

Peach slammed her club into the bug and then flung it to the far end of the shaft.

"Okay, looks like we can avoid Bowser altogether if we could just get this meteorite out of here. Toadsworth said that if we just get it off the ship, a few architects will recover it. If it can survive Earth's impact, it'll survive falling off this airship."

They climbed out of the vent and knocked out two koopas guarding the meteorite.

"So, that's what it looks like?" Daisy asked, looking at what appeared to be a brownish crudely-drawn 8-bit dimond.

"I guess. Come on, let's see if we can find something to get rid of it, like a..."

"Release comet button?" Daisy suggested.

"Yeah."  
"Right here." And Daisy pushed the big red button and it plummeted to the Earth below.

"I hope that it didn't hurt anybody in that house it landed on."

"Okay, how do we get down?" Toad asked.

"When did you get here?"  
"There was a door labeled 'Meteor room'."

"Oh."

"So, how do we get down?"  
/

Later, after they get back down to Earth:  
\

"Okay, either the great author is too lazy to think of a way to get us down, or he thinks that this joke is still funny."

"**A BIT OF BOTH ACTUALLY."**

"Alright..."

"So, what now?" Luigi asked.

"Get something to eat?" Mario suggested.

"Okay."

/

Later, Midnight:

\

A man, in his twenties, got up out of the ground.

He had gray eyes, about 17 years of age, medium hight, and, his most obvious feature: silver hair.

/

Josh: Wait, was that it?

Starlll: I decided to leave it on a bit of a cliffhanger. And no, that guy at the end isn't a villian.

Josh: Okay.

(Moment of silence.)

Flippy: Hey! Look!  
Pax the Dreamer: Hey!  
Flippy: Hey! (Hit's Pax)

Pax the Dreamer: Ouch! What was that for?!

Starlll: Sorry, but the words 'hey', 'look' and 'listen' are her lines.

Pax: Isn't that a legend of Zelda reference?

Josh: I guess.

Starlll: Okay, question time! Where did you pick up the name 'Pax the Dreamer'?

Pax: From my story that is forming in my mind but I still havn't written it. The story's name you ask? "My Dream Adventure." ...what? Okay, I know it's a lame name, but I'm not very good at names.

Starlll: Neither am I. What was your favorite SMB game?

Pax: Hmmm... Super Mario Bros. 3. (You know, the one when you pick up a leaf you turn into a racoon.) I used to play it all the time when I was a little kid.

Josh: Favorite SMB story?

Pax: If you mean a fanfic, then "Edventure of the Thousand Year Door." I'm not sure if that would qualify since it's a Mario/Ed, Edd, N Eddy crossover, but it is a good story. Possibly my favorite on all of .Net. Err, no offence. You're story is good too.

Starlll: None taken. Did you by any chance lose a large roll of 20 dollar bills, with a rubber band around it? Because I think I found the rubber band.

Pax: No, but I did lose my Magical Pandimentional Rubber Band of Doom.(TM) Um, listen, if you want to live, put down the rubber band and back away slowly...

Boogie: (Stops playing with a rubber band) Wait... what- (Covered in ash) well, at least I'm already a boo.

Josh: Mario is about to get attacked by a group hammer bros., and Daisy is tied to train tracks. Who would Luigi save?

Pax: He'd warn Mario then save Daisy. As long as Mario knows where the Hammer Bros. are, then he can take care of himself.

Josh: Ha! It was a trick question! I never said that the train would hit Daisy!

Pax: I know, but still, being tied to train tracks would have to feel uncomfertable after awhile, and who knows how long Daisy's been there. Plus, I don't think she'd take it kindly if her boyfriend chose his brother over her, even if there was no imediate danger. Also, what idiot would tie someone up and forgot to start the train? That's like evil deeds 101.

Josh: (Mutters)

Starlll: Have you ever had a dream directly/indirectly about Luigi?

Pax: Well, in "My Dream Adventure 3" we worked together to save the dream world from the void. Does that count?

Starlll: I guess.

Pax: Well, if that's it, later everybody. And sorry again, Flippy.

Flippy: (Flutters away, still angry.)

Starlll: She's been a bit moody since Tael broke up with her.

Pax: Okay... later. (Leaves.)

\

Da' List:

/

1. Solaris Prime

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. MasterofHearts1313

17. NinetailsGirl09


	6. The Mystery Train

Starlll: (playing Little King's story) Yeah, King Shishkababo! You wanna eat something? Eat my miner's fist! (A small siren on the game goes off) No! Mike is dead! (Another small siren goes off) No! Joel! (Another siren goes off) Oh no! Not Tim! (A message runs across the screen reading 'You're dieing way to much') I know! Okay, onto the giant fork... come on... no! (King Shishkababo hits and kills Starlll's player) Come on! (Restarts his Wii)

Josh: Hey, Star.

Starlll: That's Star**lll**!

Josh: Sorry. Hey, Starlll.

Flippy: Hey! (Starts flying around the calender) Look!

Starlll: Oh my gosh! You're right! I totally forgot!  
Josh: (Has a bad feeling) What?

Starlll: Have a blissful dictionary day!(8) (8 total)  
Josh: What?  
Starlll: (With a British accent) Allow me to describe to you the rules of dictionary day: today is the day in which you say large words uncommonly used by yourself, and then count the letters of certain words, which will enter a point-system that shall be displayed at the end of each sentence. Note that the words 'Dictionary', 'applesauce', and 'FlippytheFairyisveryannoyingunlesssheiswithTaelbutunfortunatelytheybrokeupsonowFlippyisannoying247' do not count. The word must be 7 letters or longer to be accepted.(72) ( 80 total)

Josh: Do I have to?

Starlll: (Still in a British accent) Yes.

Josh: Inconceivable! (13) (13 total)

Flippy: Hey! Look!

Starlll: (British accent) Oh, contrary my glowing friend. Those words do not fit together with the conversation. (39) (129 total)

_________________________________One-shot Time!!____________________________________

_Written by Starlll_:

Genre: (Which I take full credit for) Mystery!!

Oh, and: Toad is gay in this, Pennington's PO V's are in italics, and try to figure out who it was. The answer is in the next chapter.

/

_The name's Pennington. Greg _J._ Pennington._

_I was on the S.S. Express train when it happened. A classy looking dame entered my office._

"_You're a detective, right?" She asked. She had a pink dress on, blond hair, and a blue gem at the end of her necklace. That means, she must be the famous Princess Daisy._

"_Correct, Miss Daisy."  
"Uh... my name is Peach." She denied that she was the princess, but I knew she was just trying to avoid drawing attention to herself._

"_Oh, no need to play coy, Miss Daisy. Just state what you need from my services."_

"_Uh... yeah... sure... I was wondering if you would help me- I woke up this morning, and after eating several eggs, to find that someone had stolen roughly 400 coins from me!"_

_I bit my tongue to avoid gasping. _

_Princess Daisy had eaten seven eggs for breakfast!_

"_Pennington is on the case!" I said, jumping out of my desk, and dashing out the door humming my theme song._

**The Adventures of Pennington **(In black and white)**!!**

\

_I pulled out my magnifying glass, and searched Princess Daisy's room, and suddenly, a man in green approached me. He was obviously about to attack, and so, I used my reflexes of lightning to grab his wrist and then twisted it out of his hand._

"_Ouch!! What was that for?!" A man in green yelled._

"_Excuse me for being a bit on edge-there's a man who has been robbing this train."_

_The man in green was the infamous brother of Mario- LUIGI!! When I first met him, my detective senses were off because I thought _he_ was Mario, and Mario was him!_

"_Uh, yeah... just, I lost my collection of needles."_

"_No! Not twice in one day!"  
"Excuse me?"  
"The thief! He must have stolen your... you collect needles?"  
"Yeah. Long story."_

"_Come, Luigi! Despite your lower I.Q., the fact that you were the most recently robbed may prove useful! I yelled.  
"Wait, what do you mean 'lower I.Q.-'"_

"_Come on! I'll start searching in room 1 and work my way up, and you will search room number 5 and work your way down! We'll meet in room 3!"_

"_Wait, I'm not helping you!"_

_/_

"Okay, I guess I am helping you." Luigi stated when he entered room number 5.

"Uh, you mind if I come in for questioning... or something?" Luigi asked through the door, feeling like a total idiot.

"Are you talking about how Peach got robbed?" A familiar voice asked.

_Oh *##*#_ Luigi thought as he ran and hid.

"Hello?" Daisy asked, sticking her head out the door.

\

NFTA (Note From the Author): I probably forgot that mention something: Daisy and Luigi _used_ to date, but they broke up about a year or two ago. Daisy got over it, but whenever they run into each other somehow, Luigi would do anything he could to avoid her.

/

With Pennington:

\

_I barged through door number one, with my flippers ready for action! The man who was already in the room jumped three feet in the air and freaked out._

"_What are you doing here?!" He yelled._

"_Excuse me, I am detective Pennington, and I'm on an investigation."_

"_And you had to burst through my room? You almost made me rip my mushroom clear off!"  
The owner of the room was Toad, Luigi's oldest friend. Don't ask me how I know these things, I just do. Toad was apparently waxing his spotted red mushroom, which, if you want to know anything about Toads, you should know that their mushrooms are an absolutely separate part of their bodies. It is filled of fats and such, so if they get attacked, they raise the fungi on their cranium in defense._

"_I'm sorry about that. I just really don't know my own strength. Now, could you sit down in the corner while I search your room?"_

"_Uh, yes. I do mind."_

"_Don't make me get angry. You don't like me when I get angry." I warned._

"_Who are you, the Hulk?"_

"_Are you willing to find out?" I asked, threating him. My voice was armed and dangerous, like a cobra striking after it's opponent._

"_Were you just hitting on me, because it sounded like it."_

"_Uh, no. I'm not gay."_

_The fungi-headed man looked slightly disappointed. My charm even affects the same gander! Amazing! _

"_Okay, fine. I'll let you search my room. Though, you should probably;y have a warrant for the next room you search."_

_I noted his advice and then opened up his desk._

"_I nicked my hand on that sharp part of the desk. That's where there's some blood over there."_

_/_

With Luigi:

\

Luigi knocked on the door of room no. 4.

"Um, excuse me, there was a robbery earlier, and now Pennington and I have to investigate the train. You mind if I come in?"

"Yeah, sure." It was an unusual voice, very high-pitched.

When the green plumber opened the door, he was highly surprised with who was inside.

PETEY PARANAH opened the door!  
"What? I got out of jail a few months ago, and then I won the Toad Ball daily lottery. I'm going to go surprise my girlfriend over in Yoshi's Island."

"Okay... you know this train is going to Toad Town, right?"

"Yeah, I'm catching a boat over there."

"Alright. Would you mind sitting in the corner while I search the room?"

"Sure."

Petey sat down while Luigi looked through the room. There were many plants and flowers (even a small pear tree), and a few watering cans.

Luigi opened a desk and searched through it.

Nothing.

After searching the room, and only finding plants and a few moldy apples, and a lakitu with a camera named Carl.

"I'm his left-hand man." Carl explained. "When he needs something done, I'm the one he calls. Nothing big, just an occasional holding his place in line or holding his money when he's getting to into a gambling."

"Okay. Do you have your own room?" Luigi asked.

"Nah. I just tagged along with P-man and slept on my cloud."

"P-man?"

"I told him a dozen times not to call me that."

/

_I rammed open the second door, and there was nobody in sight. But then my left flank was attacked! The attacker grabbed my arm and twisted it! My elbow couldn't take the weight, and I fell to the floor. He pulled it across my neck and yelled "What are you doing here?!"._

"_I'm a detective. I'm here to investigate because of a robbery on this train."_

"_Newsflash, Holmes. You need a warrant."_

"_Oh really?" I asked, and pulled out my detective badge, and held it to my ear like a phone. "What's that, badgey? You think I should search the suspicious man's room?"  
The man had messy silver hair, gray eyes, and was about 6 ft. tall. Yeah, pretty tall compared to the other citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom._

_He held his fist to his ear like a phone, mimicking me._

"_What's that, fisticuffs? You think I should beat the guy to death with my bare fists?"  
"Okay, I guess we reached an agreement. How about... I search the room, and...uhh... pay you?"_

"_How much?"  
"35 coins?"_

"_Fine."_

_I pulled the money out of my pocket and gave it to him._

_After what felt like a long time of hunting through his room, I found a few grass stains, a decent amount of coins lying around, and a half eaten donut._

"_Thank you for your time." I shook his hand and then left the room._

\

Room 3:

/

Luigi and Pennington met up in room 3, Peach's room.

The rug hadn't been vaccumed recently, so all of Peach's footprints could be seen on the floor. Unfortunately, there were no foot prints aside from Peach's size... whatevers.

They told each other what they found, then ate some chocolate chip cookies. They were moist and warm, with chocolate chips melting on their tongues. They dipped their second warm cookies in a glass of milk, and then put the cooled circles in their mouthes, enjoying every moment of pure sugary goodness.

Okay, raise your hand if your mouth just watered a little.

That's what I thought.

"So, you didn't search an important room that contained possibly vital information, just because your ex-girlfriend was in it?" Pennington asked, picking up another cookie.

"Yup."  
"Okay, I can understand that. So, let's go over what we found:  
1) Money hidden in room no. 2,

Petey has a bunch of plants in his room, and a Lakitu, both ex-criminals.

Toad cut his hand on something.

There are ridiculously good cookies in the kitchen."

"Alright. I think I figured it all out." Luigi said.

_____________________________End of One-Shot!! 

Sir Starlll: As you can tell by my script-form writing cue, I changed my name from the original Starlll, to Sir Starlll. I figure that it shall add more class to the website of Fanfiction. (53) (245 total)  
Josh: You're good at that.

Sir Starlll: Why thank you my hyper little friend. (245 total.)

Flippy: Hey! (Her watch beeps, she looks at it, then leaves.)

Josh: I'm not little!

Sir Starlll: I apologize. (9) (254 total.)

Josh: By the way, where did Flippy go?

Sir Starlll: Probably to go-

Mr. Paper Luigi: Happy Dictionary day!!  
Josh: Does everyone know about that but me?!

Sir Starlll: Yup. Anyway, what's your favorite SMB game?

Mr. Paper Luigi: My favorite SMB game?... I do like most of them, but I think it has to be- (Loud explosion in the background.)

Sir Starlll: Don't worry about that, it was just Flippy vandalizing Tael's house.

Mr. Paper Luigi: Oka-a-a-ay...

Sir Starlll: By the way, do you by any chance have a giant plunger, without the stick? No questions.

Mr. Paper Luigi: Yeah. (Pulls a 20 foot plunger out of his pocket.) This big enough?  
Sir Starlll: I suppose...

Josh: Favorite Super Paper Mario moment?

Mr. Paper Luigi: Luigi trying to crash Bowser and Peach's wedding: It's so heroic!

Josh: Favorite Luigi's mansion moment?

Mr. Paper Luigi: Luigi laughing a Mario at the end. It's what we all never expected.

Sir Starlll: Have you ever had a dream about Luigi?

M.P.L.: Well, I had a dream I was in an office. I saw Luigi spinning in a chair for some reason.

Josh: What was the color of the atomic Lance sir Gerald FitzMcPatrick the 92nd wielded in the story of Greginhper the 86249275th that was given to Applefqbgwiurng3qhergv the 982573895815694698234759th? (88 points) (109 total)

M.P.L.: How was that a question?

Sir Starlll: (Realizes how many points Josh just got) wha...wha...wha...

Josh: (looking up words on line) What is wrong? Do you have Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis? The inflammation of the lungs, caused by the inhalation of a very fine silica dust? (67) (176)

Sir Starlll: But... but... (254 total)

Josh: Or do you have acetylsery-

(20 minutes later)

Josh: (Continued)-erine? (1185) (1361 total)

Mr. Paper Luigi: Yeah, I'm just going to leave... (Leaves)

Sir Starlll: Later.

\

Da' List:

1. Solaris Prime

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

ThaFanned

MasterofHearts1313

NinetailsGirl09

18. Michaiah (The most recent) (Who will be guest starring next chapter.)


	7. Dinner with the Professor

Starlll: (The camera is at an unusual angle, so you can't tell what Starlll is looking at, but he's obviously looking at something.) Wow! I didn't even know that was possible! I feel kinda' dirty now.

Josh: (walking in) I'm back! What-

**(Screen stops.)**

**Starlll: Hey. I just want you to know, the following makes Josh and I look gay. We are NOT. I have nothing against gay people, I even discourage using 'gay' as an adjective when something is annoying. Once again, we aren't gay.**

**(Screen starts moving again.)**

Josh: (Continued.) -do you want for dinner-

Starlll: No! Don't come in! I don't want you to see me like this!  
Josh: No! No! This can't be happening!

(Camera zooms out, and it shows that Starlll is playing Fallout 3 on the Xbox 360)

Josh: We are NINTENDO fans! I can't believe you cheated on me like this!  
Starlll: I swear, we only did it once!

Josh: I... I just can't be around you right now. (Leaves the room.)

(Moment of silence.)

Starlll: (Picks up the controller) Hehe... DIE RAIDER!! (Uses a missile launcher to shoot a giant crab-thing) EAT NUCLEAR WASTE MIRELURK!!

/

Starlll: Oh, and Andrew, the guy who sends the anonymous reviews, Flippy wants to say something to you.

Flippy the Fairy: Hey!  
Starlll: You ought to know, Flippy doesn't look like Tinkerbell with a mushroom hat. She looks like a fairy from Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time. If you hadn't played the game (you should), she is like a pink glowing ball of light with wings.

\

Conclusion of "Mystery Train":

/

Two toad cops armed with Nintendo Zappers burst ed through Petey Paragraph's door.

"You're under arrest for grand theft coin!" One yelled.

"I'm innocent! I swear on my shorts!" Petey yelled.

"Not you, the Lakitu!"

Carl was dragged away, leaving the cloud behind.

\

About lunch time:

/

Daisy was walking through the hallway, heading for the lunch cart, when a man ran into her, causing the princess to drop what she was holding (I'm feeling lazy. Use your imagination.). The man apologized, and helped her pick what he caused her to drop.

Then they actually saw each other's faces.

"Hi."

"Hi. And yes, this is my natural hair color." He said, gesturing to his gray-silver hair.

"I believe you."

There was a moment of silence.

"This may sound a bit weird, considering we just met, but, would you like to get something to eat... as in, a date?" The man with silver hair asked.

Daisy grinned.

"Sure."

"By the way, my name is Jason. Though my friends call me 'Comet'. Long story."

"I'm Daisy."

Jason 'Comet' walked to the lunch cart with his new date, feeling the 100 coins in his pocket that he had stolen from Carl the Lakitu, which had been stolen from Peach.

\

**Note: If you were just skimming, I recommend you reread the last line.**

/

Now for the real oneshot:

\

Luigi grabbed his poltergeist 30O0 and started to vacuum the final few ice-covered boos that made up the titan 'Booloususs'.

"Yeah!" He shouted punching the air.

"Good job Luigi!" E. Gadd said over the GBA Horror. "How about you come down here for a while? I'll make an old family recipie; pickled dandilions and beetle juice!"

Luigi accepted and ran back to the hunter's room. He pulled out his GBA Horror and took a picture of the mirror. Several blue spots appeared in his eyes and he started to spin around, dizzy. At one point, he finally had to stop, and he found himself in the main foyer.

"I have no idea whatsoever how that works," Luigi said. "But I love it!"

He opened the door and ran through the courtyard and past the gates to E. Gadd's small hut.

The short old man already had the dinner in his hands, and gave a plate to Luigi.

The Italian man grabbed a fork and began eating the dandilions without hesitation. He had eaten much worse than beetle juice and pickled dandilions.

"So, how long have you been in the ghost busting buisness?" Luigi asked.

"about 50 years." Gadd answered, pouring another glass of beetle juice. "It all started with those two angels over there." Gadd gesturied to the two angel statues near the entrence of the ghost gallery. "I bought them one day for my wife, Tanya. She was into the whole 'porcelin fountain' thing."

"Those aren't fountains." Luigi pointed out.

"To the first glance, no. But if you capture enough ghosts, then a stream of long, silver water will pour out. When I discovered that, I designed the Poltergeist 30 0 0. Tanya thought I was crazy at the time, rambling on about how I was going to start catching spirits, but it made me happy so she didn't mind."

"So, what happened to your wife?" Luigi asked.

" Well, when I got the fountain working for the first time, she was surprised to find that I actually was right about ghosts, and we designed a second poltergeist, the spirit 2 0 0 0. It wasn't as long of a suction, but it had almost twice the power. We were an unstoppable team! We went places even the Boo Busters wouldn't go! One day, though, we discovered a new type of ghost. Tanya called them 'banshees' because they had a scream that matched bowser's daughter. What's her name..."  
"Wendy O' Koopa?" Luigi suggested.

"Yeah! If you heard a banshee scream, you'd think you were at the opera! I'll never forget the time one screamed in a church one night, and all of the stained glass windows broke around it. What was your question? Oh yeah... well, you see... one time, we were investigating an abandoned lab, and a banshee screamed right next to my wife. She was standing next to all sorts of lab equipment, and knives and glass... she tripped in shock..."  
"And landed on the knives?" Luigi finished.

"No."

"The Lab equpiment?"  
"No."  
"The glass broke?"  
"No. She fell right into a generator. Electroquted." A tear fell down E. Gadd's cheek as he though about it.

"We don't have to talk about that if you don't want to." Luigi said.

"No... it's alright. I saw what happened to her and I caught that banshee. And I killed it."  
"You... you killed a ghost!?" Luigi asked, stunned.

"Yep. I kept it in a ghost-proof jar and designed a glove that could kill spirits. It's gone for good now. But I've thought about that moment for years. I remember the feeling. It was like freedom mixed with good air. But in the corner of it all... I felt disapointment. I felt disapointed because even if I avenged Tanya... it wouldn't bring her back. So, now I just catch ghosts and put them in one of those fountains."

Luigi smiled at his friend.

"You don't have many friends, do you?"

"Counting you? One."

The man in green put his dish in Gadd's sink and picked up the vaccum.

"Later. I'll tell you when I catch a few more boos."

/

Notes: I didn't make Wendy O' Koopa up, and for those of you who don't believe me, Master of Hearts can back me up. Although I might have made up the lungs thing.

\

Starlll: F.Y.I., Josh and I have made up. I just introduced him to Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker and he forgived me immediately.

Josh: Yeah. Anyways, please welcome our guest star, the mind reading, tear grenade holding, Michaiah!!  
Michaiah: Hi everybody!

Starlll: Question time! Where did you get the name 'Michaiah'? Your parents? Make it up? Fire Emblem?

Michaiah: Well, I was thinking of Fire Emblem, but most of my fan characters' personalities when they're named Michaiah was come up with by myself. The original was Micaiah from I think Path of Radiance? Was that for the Gamecube?

Starlll: I think so.

Josh: Is it true that you're a mind reader (You said you where in a review.)  
Michaiah: Yeah, it's true. It's mostly when people are easy to read that I can do so.

Starlll: (Shrugs) Try to read mine.

Michaiah: Okay... (Concentrating) Let's see... (Go to w w w . swinetastesfine . c o m) THAT'S what you're thinking of?!  
Starlll: No, that's a distraction wall. It stops people from looking further. But if you do, you'll have Pearson to pay.

Michaiah: Don't you mean 'Hell to pay'?  
Starlll: No. You'll get the tar beaten out of you if Pearson catches you trying to read my mind.

Josh: Will you give me a demonstration of your mind reading powers?  
Michaiah: I just did.

Josh: No! That was just wall-reading!  
Michaiah: Oh. Well, no. I'm just mean like that.  
Starlll: Have you ever had a dream about Luigi?

Michaiah: Well, sort of. I had a dream about Bowser's Inside Story where I was wearing Luigi's cap and my best friend, who is also shorter and older than me, was wearing Mario's. We were inside Bowser and fighting Wisdurm and speaking Shakespearian.  
Josh: What is your opinion of the Super Mario Bros. Movies?

Michaiah: (slaps Josh) I TOLD YOU, WE DO NOT SPEAK OF IT!!  
Starlll: (Laughs at Josh's pain.) Okay, who would-

Josh: Wait! Slap him!  
Michaiah: Okay-

Starlll: (Pulls out a dual-bladed lightsaber.) You do and I kill you. Anyway, who would win in a fight: Tim the Trashcan, or Joe the flying turtle?

Michaiah: Uh...my answer is Not Available. The correct choice is Mr. L.

Starlll: Okay... What is your favorite SMB game?  
Michaiah: None. Paper Mario and Paper Mario: TTYD are awesome. SPM was a bit disappointing...except for MR. L!  
Josh: Do you by any chance have a giant tear grenade without a pin inside it? I lost mine.

Michaiah: Why ye-e-e-es, I do. But I'm not letting you borrow it because I'm mean like that.

Flippy: (Steals a granade from her pocket.) Hey! (Holds up stolen grenade.)

Starlll: Oh no! That doesn't have the pin inside it!  
Michaiah: I know.

(Everyone realizes it's about to go off.)  
All: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!! HELP!!

Boogie: (Entering the room.) (Opening his mouth really wide each time he talks.) Sorry I'm late, I just got held up in traffic- (Flippy throws the tear grenade in his mouth.) (Grenade blows up.) (Smoke pouring out his mouth) I (Choke)... don't get (Wheeze)... paid enough (Gag)... for this. (Passes out, smoke still coming out of his mouth.)  
Starlll: (Throws a blanket over Boogie.) (Using a towel to fan the smoke away from the smoke alarms.) Anyway, anything else to say?

Michaiah: Yeah. Possible random shoutouts:  
MR. L FOR PRESIDENT! I like him better than Obama anyways, maybe because he's got l33t powerz?  
GO WEEGIE, GO WEEGIE, GO WEEGIE... -dances-  
I think we all agree Birdo should be killed with fire.  
MR. L FTW.  
Oh yus, Fire Emblem is good. Very good.

Starlll: Okay... (Presses an eject button to shoot the guest out of the room.) Sorry this took so long. I blame Josh's evil twin, Albert.

/

The world's greatest list:

1. Solaris Prime

2. Faedra 369

3. Polocatfan,

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. MasterofHearts1313

17. NinetailsGirl09

18. Michaiah

19. Andrew


	8. Thanksgiving

Author's Notes:

/

(Josh opens door)

Josh: Hey, Starlll, watcha' doing?

Starlll: Just playing some darts.

(Josh sees the dart board.)

Josh: What are all those papers on it for?  
Starlll: I'm trying to decide what I'm going to work on after I finish His Name is Mudd 2, Sci-Phy (I know, that's now how you spell 'Sci-Fi'), and this story.  
Josh: Okay... (Grabs a dart.) Three...

Starlll: Two...

Josh: One...

Both: Throw!

(Both throw, and Starlll's dart misses completely, while Josh's bounces off.)

Starlll: The wind shifted.

Josh: And the board was at an angle.

Starlll: Yeah...

Josh: Probably...

(Moment of silence)

Starlll: You want to play Luigi's mansion, don't you?

Josh: Yes please.

\

Josh: Man, I wish I could probably beat you in this in real life.

Starlll: What?

Josh: Yeah! I bet you three credits that I can beat you in an actual ghost-bust-a-thon!

Starlll: No, I could totally suck up more ghosts than you! I'm like a ghost mosquito!

Josh: Either way, we'll never find out.

Starlll: Actually, we will!

Josh: What?

(Starlll snaps his fingers.)

Pax the Dreamer: (Appears in a puff of smoke.) Man, I never get tired of that!

Josh: Ooh! Is he gonna teleport us to another dimension, where we can start our own ghost/boo-busting group, having the time of our lives?!

Starlll: Uhh... no. Pax-man, what are you doing here?

Pax: Oh, well, just, if you see Midna in an angry rampage holding a chainsaw, I was never here. Except for when I guest-starred the other time.

Starlll: Does it involve your Truth or Dare story?  
Pax: Yeah. (Dissipates in a puff of smoke.)

/

(Meanwhile, outside the door)

Boogie: I can't wait to show them my new "Pax the Dreamer" impersonation!

\

(Back with the nitwits-I mean, the other people:)

Starlll: Any, my plan is to-

Midna: (Appears in a warp portal) (Holding a chainsaw, angry) Did that idiot Pax stop through here?!

Josh: Uh... ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aybe.

Midna: He better not been! Otherwise, I'm coming for you two next. (Almost dissipates)

Starlll: Did it involve the truth or dare story Pax is writing?

Midna: Yeah. (Glares at Starlll) some idiot dared him to slap me across the face.

Starlll: Uh...

Boogie: (Doing his Pax the Dreamer impersonation.) Hi folks!

Midna: (Thinking he's Pax) DI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-IEE!! !! (Uses the chainsaw on him in an angry rage.)

/

(In the emergency room)

Boogie: Why do I keep getting beaten up?

\

Starlll: Now that that's over, here's my idea: we use my secret room! (Starlll picks up a red book and the bookshelf flips away, revealing a bunch of brains with jars inside them.) Whoops, wrong book. (Takes out another book, and the wall next to them opens up.) It's my simulator room! Watch! (Starlll presses a button and a sim of Biff Atlas working out on a chin-up bar)

Josh: Cool! I'll go first!

\

(Josh can't figure out how to get Biff Atlas's heart to show up, so he just punches him in the face.)

/

Later:

\

Josh: (With a bloody nose.) I got him down to 53 hp.

Starlll: My turn.

/

(Atlas is on the chin-up bar again.)

Starlll: So tempting. (Pulls down Altlas's pants.)

Atlas: (Heart showing) AAHH-H-H-H-H-H-H!! !!

(Starlll uses his poltergeist 3.500 on Biff, and he tries to run away, but his pants are around his knees, so he trips. Then, he tries to crawl away on his knees, but the carpet gives out underneath him.)

\

Josh: I swear to God, you cheated.

/

\

One shot time!!

/

By the way: For those of you who have forgot, Daisy and Luigi had broken up, and now Daisy is dating a guy she met on the train last chapter named Jason, or "Comet". Oh, yeah, and Toad is gay.

Oh, and it's Thanksgiving.

\

"So-a, Luigi, are you-a coming to my place for-a Thanksgiving or not-a?" Mario asked.

"Dude, you Italian accent has way too many 'A's in it." Luigi pointed out, over the phone.

"I-a have a cold-a. My nose gets-a stuffy and-a you know-a what happens from then-a."

"Well, okay, I'll come."

/

The day before Thanksgiving:

\

Luigi ran as fast as he could to Mario's house. Don't forget, he was living in the mansion he built from the money he found (stole) from the Haunted Mansion, so he had to run through the forest.

(Note: picture the following in an old SMB format, because that's how it's being written.)

Luigi pulled a mushroom out of his pocket and grew a foot higher. He ran and jumped over a pit dug by goombas, and stomped on a red koopa running in circles. Then, he kicked the shell, which took down a few womp blocks (the dudes who float in midair and then slam down to crush Mario/Luigi).

He ran as quickly as he could past a few lava bubbles, then entered a door.

It was full of Hammer Bros.

"I'll just be leaving now..." Luigi said, and ran back through the door before a plethora of hammers were thrown at him.

He jumped over a spiny and avoided an unpleasant encounter with a boo by sucking it up with his Poltergeist 30 00. He jumped onto a tree, and stomped on a flying Koopa hovering over another pit.

Luigi jumped over a bullet bill, then crouched under a second one.

He looked at a full troop of Lakitus, Spinys, and Hammer bros.

The green man pulled a star out of his pocket and exclaimed:

"Let's-a go!"

He charged as quickly as he could during his burst of invincibility, shooting out fireballs left and right.

/

"Hey bro. Did you bring the desert?" Mario asked Luigi, holding the door open.

"Yep. Tayce T. from Toad Town made it. It's-a mushroom cake!"

Then (princess) Peach walked in.

"Hey, Luigi, just so you know, Daisy's in the living room." She warned him.

"Thank you." He said, turning the complete other way from the living room.

When he left, Mario asked his girlfriend "Why did you say that? He has to see her sooner or later."

"He does, but he will when he's ready."

Toad, his boyfriend (yes, he's gay. Get over it, homophobic people!!), Daisy, and Jason/Comet were playing "Tac-man 3" on the Bintendo Mii. (Yes, I just made that up off the top of my head.)

Daisy's score was slightly less than her boyfriend's. Jason/Comet had never played before, although he was still doing pretty well. But Toad was defiantly taking the lead by a 400 point mark.

"No, no, no..." Jason muttered, Daisy's score going up higher than his.

"Yes... yes..." Daisy whispered, her score going up.

"No... grab the banana coin... no... wrong bridge..." Toad said, nobody having any idea what he was talking about.

"I'm probably supposed to be muttering something right now..." Toad's boyfriend said, confused.

When the game ended (Toad won), Mario had called them for dinner.

Daisy was next to her boyfriend and Peach, who sat next to Mario, who was next to Yoshi (a late arriver), and Luigi sat next the Toad.

* * *

(Here's a poorly drawn diagram:

Peach|O|Mario

Daisy|O|Yoshi

Jason|O|Luigi

Toad|O| Toad's Boyfriend

"Hey, Luigi, can you pass me the bread?" Jason asked.

Luigi turned his head away, forcing him to awkwardly reach for it across the table.

"So, Yosh, how's the island?" Luigi asked his friend.

"Yoshi. Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi-yoshi." (Monkeys have overrun it, and a bunch of frogs are eating our food, but we've seen better days.)

"Hey, Luigi, remember that time when we were kids, we got attacked by Kamek?" Mario asked.

"Actually, I think it was Kammy."

"No, you're thinking of Kamella."

"Well, whichever it was, remember it?"  
"Was it the first time or the second?"  
"The second. We were playing in those caves we used to go to..."

FLASHBAA AA AACK!! !!

Mario and Luigi were waddling through a few caves (being watched by their parents), no older than 5 years old. Mario was climbing up a mushroom, while Luigi hoisted him up.

Suddenly, an old koopa flew in on a magic broomstick thing, and grabbed Mario. Then, she did a U-turn, and grabbed Luigi too.

Their parents were too in shock of how fast it happened to get their children back, so nothing could be done.

END OF FLASHBAA AA AACK!!

"Yeah. Those were good times." Luigi said, half-sarcastic, half-earnest.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi _yoshi_ yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi **yoshi** ?" (Yeah. Hey, remember that time when you were older, 200 pounds heavier, and still used me like a horse?)

"Sorry, buddy." Mario said, patting his friend on the back.

"Hey, aren't we supposed to give thanks, or something?" Peach asked, stopping Mario from cutting the turkey.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi!" (Let's not. Instead, let's say what we're _not_ thankful for!)

Luigi was the first to jump at the opportunity, remembering what happened to him while running to Mario's house.

"I'm not thankful for the swarms of Goombas around my house."  
"I'm not thankful for the Homophobic people out there."

"I second that."

"I'm not thankful for the potatoes burning." Peach muttered, and Mario shrugged apologetically. Apparently, he had baked the potatoes.

"I am _definitely_ not thankful for the freezing cold snow that I have to shovel every night."

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi-yoshi yoshi-yoshi **yoshi** yoshi." (I'm not thankful for the monkeys throwing coconuts at me **whenever** I leave my house.)

"And I'm not thankful for all of the T.V. Shows taking the end-of-year break from new episodes." Mario muttered, then added: "And all of the you tube videos making us look stupid."

"Here here." They all agreed.

"So, what about you, Comet?" Toad asked.

The man with silver hair shrugged.

"How much time you got?" He asked.

Laughter chorused around the table.

\

When the night ended, Comet/Jason asked the Man in Red "Is it just me, or has Luigi been giving me the cold shoulder all night?"  
"Oh. That. It's probably because you're dating Daisy."  
"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Well, a few years ago, during high school, Luigi and Daisy were dating. Then, she broke it off. He never really got over her."

"Why did she break up with him?" He asked.

"That's something neither of them told us. You'll have to ask her yourself."

/

Meanwhile, with E. Gadd:

\

E. Gadd was busy studying the meteorite that the "Mario" gang discovered a few chapters ago.

"Yeah..." He muttered, tracing the patterns on the space-rock. "It defiantly had something in it."

/

Back with Starlll and Josh:

\

Starlll: (Playing Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn) (It's a different one than the one in ch. 5) Come ON Kurth. You're a BLACK DRAGON!! You should be able to level an entire BATTLEFIELD!! But no, you're TERRIBLE!! Honestly, I wish I could just have given you and Ena the boot, and use someone good, Like Boyd, or Mia, but NO!! I HAVE to use you. And this is the LAST LEVEL. So now I have to useless units-

Flippy: Hey!

Josh: Who are you talking to?

Starlll: The T.V. Why?

Josh: No reason.

Starlll: Anyway, back to the game- (A "Goddess's Hand" soldier attacks Kurth, killing him) #**#it!! M#%*#**%!! That's it. (Turns off his Wii) I'm playing Pokemon.

Josh: Shouldn't we do the guest star first?  
Starlll: Fine.

Josh: Introducing...

Starlll: Faedra369!

Faedra: Hi everybody!!

Flippy: Hey!

Faedra: (Sees Flippy) Cool! (Touches Flippy)

Starlll: NO DON'T-

Flippy: (Screams and starts flying in circles around Faedra, throwing energy at her.) HEY!! (Flies away.)

Faedra: What just happened?

Starlll: Pink fairies can't stand to be touched! Why do you think Link had to keep them in jars?!

Faedra: Sorry...

Starlll: Sorry's not going to get Flippy back, will it?

Faedra: Fine. I'll go look for her after this episode.

Starlll: Good. Now, Where did you get the name 'Faedra'? Your parents? Make it up? Video game?

Faedra: I seriously have NO idea....it just acme out of the hat i guess...=D oh wait i remember!!! My friend started calling me that cuz she saw it right under my name in the phone book!!! wow...that was a while ago...i had to dig back in this hollow head....

Josh: Name the first eight colonies that were made. Quick!  
Faedra: um...trick question...Delaware...um...PA...NJ, Georgia, Connecticut, Massachusetts, MD, South Carolina...I think thats 8....

Starlll: Again!  
Faedra: PA, NJ, GA, MA, MD, DE, SC, NC...thats 8 too? Right?

Boogie: Close enough. Have you ever had a dream about Luigi?  
Faedra: Well DUH! He and I killed my sister and cousin it was AWESOME...and gory...

Starlll: What is your opinion on the Super Mario Bros. Movies? (If you have never seen it before, oh well.)  
Faedra: I has NOOOO idea....I'd has to say....no fin...but I still hat Mario...i ALWAYS has....

Josh: Who would win in a fight: Tim the Trashcan, or Joe the flying turtle?  
Faedra: Joe the flying turtle. I have ALWAYS had faith in them since like EVER even if they're weak or superdooperlooper strong...

Josh: (Assuming you've played the game) What was your favorite Luigi's Mansion moment?  
Faedra: the part when Mario walks in and his head gets eaten off then his corpse is thrown in the ocean and is eaten by a whale and the whale hates him so he throws him up and a shark sees him and eats him and digests him and then they (they as in the awesomest people EVER) toss him to me who has all these gloves (ten times) and i throw whats left of him in a bonfire and- OK im dreaming...i hasn't played it...i like that idea though...

Josh: That was my favorite part, too!

Starlll: What is your favorite SMB game?  
Faedra: Super Mario 64...even though Mario stars it its fun killing him...i still haven't found Luigi though...(sheds a tear) but at least bowser was in it...=D

Starlll: I know where Luigi is! Go to the ghost level, and in one room (I forget which) there is a power flower, which you use Mario to get and then go up the ledge right above the doorway you entered in. From there is a Luigi painting (which is very good, it really captures his essence.) that you jump into.  
Faedra: Thank you!

Starlll: Anyway, Do you by any chance have a giant piece of red lettuce? Can I borrow it? Remember, no questions asked.

Faedra:Oh ya sure! (digs in pocket (no questions asked about THE fae's pocket) and pulls out a purple, green, orange, red, and blue lettuce) which one was it again?

Starlll: The red one. Thank you. Now... (kicks Faedra out of the house.) **AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU FOUND FLIPPY!! !! !!**

/

The list:

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Andrew

3. Polocatfan

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Solaris Prime

17. NinetailsGirl09

18. Michaiah

19. Faedra 369

Yeah, because what you did, Faedra, You're at the bottom of the list! You're just clinging onto the bottom, hoping not to fall off to a certain death while the others (Aside from Michaiah) (Sorry, Michaiah) are safely secure near the top!

\

Help Faedra find Flippy!

While she doesn't deserve it, vote on where you think Flippy is hiding!

1) In a pot

In the jungle (the mighty jungle, where the lion sleeps)

or, CANDYLAND!!


	9. A Parody Carol

A/N

/

Starlll: IT'S AUTHOR'S WEEK!!

Silicon: Yeah!! (Moment of silence) Wait... what?

Starlll: You mean, you don't _know_?! When I get time off of school, I make up for all my lost writing time! So, these next few days are going to be full of nonstop writing!

Silicon: Oh...

Starlll: Yup...

Silicon: Say... where's Pearson?

Starlll: On some resort island.

\

Meanwhile, on Wuhu island:

/

Sky Diving instructor: Okay, now jump out of the plane. Now, if you feel nervous-

Pearson: Later. (Jumps out of the plane. Grabs onto three (3) different people by the arms, then slowly falls in the air.)

Sky diver1: Whoa! This is freaky!

Sky Diver2: Yeah!

Sky diver3: What do we do if we're going to get air-sick?

Pearson: (Shrugs) Let go.

Sky diver3: I'm gonna be sick- (Pearson lets go of his arm) AH-HH-HH-HH-HH!! !! !!

\

Back with the others:

/

Starlll: I sent him there so he could show them what real men are like.

Silicon: Hey, Starlll, aren't you always saying that you and Pearson are total opposites?

Starlll: Yes. Why?

Silicon: And didn't you say that Pearson would show them what real men are like?

Starlll: Yes. Why?

Silicon: But, if he's going to show them what real men are like, wouldn't that imply that he's a real man?

Starlll: Yes. Why?

Silicon: But aren't you always saying that you two are opposites?

Starlll: Yes. Why?  
Silicon: Never mind.

\

Name: An Parody Carol

Genre: Parody

Oh, and:

Characters:

Ebeneezer Scrooge: Luigi

Marley: Yoshi

Christmas Past: Eldstar

Christmas Present: Wario

Christmas Yet-To-Come: ??

Nephew/Fan: Mario

Bob Cratchit: Toad

Mrs. Cratchit: Toad's boyfriend (Yup! They went up to Canada and got married!)

Tiny Tim: Tiny Toad

Portly Gentlemen: Koopas

Belle: Daisy

Belle's husband: Jason (But they aren't married, still dating.)

School Children: Ghosts from Luigi's Mansion

Boy walking by: Birdo

/

Yoshi was dead, to start with.

For you to truly understand the following story, you must truly and fully believe that Yoshi was as dead as a doornail.

Mind! I don't exactly know what is dead about a doornail. I always thought that a coffin nail was the deadest piece of ironmongery. But, who am I to question the words of our ancestors, so let me say once again:

Yoshi was as dead as a doornail.

His partner in work was Mr. Luigi. Even after Yoshi died, Luigi never painted out his name on the business sign. Sometimes new employees would call Luigi Luigi, and sometimes Yoshi. But he didn't care, he answered to both.

The base of this story begins seven years after Yoshi had died, on Christmas Eve.

Luigi sat in his box office, with a large window, watching his employee, Toad, through the corner of his eye. Toad was used to Luigi's cold business, so he was dressed in very warm clothing.

There was a knock on the door, to which Toad answered to immediately.

"Hey-a there, bro!" Mario yelled, running up to Luigi. "Merry Christmas-a!"

"Bah!" Luigi shouted, and followed with a "Humbug-a!"

"Christmas a humbug-a? Do my ears deceive me?"  
"No they do not. I can't believe this Christmas. How can you celebrate when you find yourself a year ?older but not an hour richer? Humbug-a!"

"Oh, knock that silliness of-a, bro! I always thought of Christmas time as a time for giving! So, I'm inviting you to dinner tomorrow. Come on!" Mario offered.  
"Humbug-a."

"No, then?"  
"Good evening, Mario."

"Merry Christmas, bro!"

"Good evening, Mario!"

"And a Merry Christmas to you too, Toad!" To this, Toad smiled and waved.

"I said, good evening, Mario!" Luigi shouted.

Toad opened the door for Mario, and left it open for two koopas with black-and-white checkered shells.

"Good evening, mister Luigi! There has been a shortage in soccer balls in the area, and us being koopas, we can't help but be concerned. So, we are here to collect donations for a better sports facility!" One koopa said.  
"How much may we put you down for?" The other asked.

"None."  
"You wish to remain anonymous?" The other asked.

"No. What I wish is to be left alone!" Luigi shouted, and kicked them out on their shells.

\

"I suppose you'll be asking for tomorrow off, then." Luigi mumbled to Toad.

"If it is convenient, sir."

"Well it's not convenient, and it's not fair. But, I suppose you will need the whole day off. Be here four hours earlier the day after and you'll stay four hours later."  
"Yes sir. Thank you, sir!" Toad said, careful not to step on any of the checkered Koopa shells Luigi had kicked over.

/

There is nothing remarkable about the knocker on Luigi's front door, except for the fact that it was very, very large.

But most of you don't care about door knockers, so onto the good part:

Luigi lit a small fire and sat down with some herbal tea.

Then, a small bell, long out of use began to chime.

"What?" Luigi asked, listening to the sound.

Two more bells began to chime, and finally a fourth one. It was gradually getting louder and more rapid.

"I won't believe it! I refuse!" There was a moment of silence. "Bah humb-"

Then two chains came crashing through the door.

"Yoshi... yoshi yoshi yo-o-o-oshi-i-i-i..."  
"Yo-yoshi!?" He asked. It was Yoshi alright. He had chains running all along him, and a cloth tied around the bottom of his jaw and the top of his head.

"Yoshi. Yoshi-yoshi yoshi..."  
"Okay... who _were_ you then?"

"Yoshi yoshi-yoshi..."

"But aren't you... dead?"

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi. Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi! Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi."

"But... you were always a good man of business!"

To this, the cloth around Yoshi's head fell off, and his jaw dropped down.  
"**Yoshi yoshi yoshi!!? Yoshi yoshi yoshi!! Yoshi yoshi yoshi!!**"

"I-I am sorry! I didn't mean to offend you!"  
"Yoshi yoshi yoshi. Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi."

"Is this the chance you spoke of?"

"Yoshi."

"I think I'd rather not..."

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi."  
"Can't I just take them all at once, and get it over with?"

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi."

"Okay. But don't be flowery, Yoshi! And don't be too hard, either!"

\

Thanks to Yoshi's very detailed explanation, Luigi was awake for the first spirit's arrival. While he didn't see it actually appear, he saw it's full description when it floated over his bed.

It was a large star, with a mustache so big that it dominated it's entire face.

"Hello, young soul. My name is Eldstar. I am the spirit of Christmas Past."  
"The spirit whose coming was foretold to me?"

"The same."

"Very well... do as you must." Luigi said, afraid as if it was going to hurt. When he finally opened his eyes, he turned around and realized where he was. "It's the Haunted Mansion!" He yelled.

"Do you remember the way?" Eldstar asked.

"Remember it? I can walk it blindfold!" Luigi shouted, running up the long winding path to the mansion.

"This is where you made your first adventure and trip to fame."  
"Yes. Sometimes I long for those days..."

"I know. Your bottom lip is trembling. And what is that on your cheek?"

Luigi said that the tear was just a pimple, and they continued on.

"Let's move forward to later that same night." Eldstar said. They were in the courtyard, and they could see Past-Luigi fighting Bogmire.

"This creature is what showed you true fear. You spent many nights awake fearing it."  
"Humbug-a."  
"Very well. Now view this memory of you saving your brother."

The new memory showed Luigi laughing at his brother, with tears of joy running down his face.

"You shared many good times together. Tell me why you now shun him from your life." Eldstar asked.

"I do not wish to shun him, he has just grown stupid with the years that have come."

"If that is what you believe... But my time grows short. You shall next meet the ghost of Christmas Present." And with that, Eldstar dissipated with a bright light.

/

Luigi went back to bed, shakily-only to find someone else in it!

"Gwaha! My name is Wario!" The spirit shouted.

"Are you another of the spirits that of which's coming has been foretold?" Luigi asked.

"What? Too many words. I was just told to go here and show some guy around town."  
Luigi rolled his eyes at the spirit.

"Humbug-a."

But Wario thought Luigi said 'Hamburger', and held one up from the large stack of food that was next to him.

"Yep. Cheeseburger, too."

Wario took him across town, showing Luigi broke people.

"Whoa! Check out that guy, Luigi! He's ugly!"

"What?" Luigi asked.

"Nothin. Anyway, let's see that Toad of your's house."

"Okay..."

The spirit of Christmas Present brought Luigi to Toad's house.

"I wonder where my husband is..." Toad husband asked.

"Here I am!" Toad shouted, bursting through the door. He was carrying a smaller toad on his back, who bore a small crutch.

"Finally! Sit down, you too Tiny Toad."

"Wait..." Wario said, watching them. "But if they're gay, then how-"

"Tiny Toad was adopted." Luigi explained.

"Oh."

The family sat down to eat a large goose, when Tiny Toad said:

"Bless us! Every fungus!"

The small family laughed, and they ate the goose.

"Is that all they can afford?" Luigi asked, looking at the small goose.

"With how little you pay, yes."

Luigi was slightly surprised, but they kept moving.

"These are children, trying to play sports. But the funds for the games have been lost, so now they must scrounge up what they can to play." Wario said.

A bunch of Shy Guys were playing with a spiny, using it as a baseball. A few Goombas were using koopa shells as soccer balls, and two or three kids were using bomb-ombs to play hot potato with.

A watch on Wario's wrist beeped, and he said:

"Whoops! My time is up, kid. Have fun with the ghost of Christmas Future!"

"No, wait! But I-"

\

A dark shadow slowly crept around Luigi's bed as he tried to sleep.

"Are... are you the ghost of Christmas yet to come?" Luigi asked.

The spirit pointed across the street to a dim church.

Slowly, Luigi walked across the street to look inside the church.

There were several people spitting inside of a coffin as they walked by.

Luigi looked back at the spirit, who pointed out at a group of people, huddled around talking.

"I thought he'd never die!" One man said.

"Neither did I. Did you hear who got his money?" Asked another.

"All I know is, it wasn't me. He was so close do it, I wouldn't be surprised if he was buried with it!" Said the third.

The spirit pointed to a large graveyard.

"Before you show me any more, spirit, tell me, are these the shadows of things that are to happen, or things that _may_ happen?"

The spirit pointed to the graveyard.

"Because, if these _will_ happen, what is the point of showing me this?"

The spirit pointed to the graveyard, still.

Luigi slowly walked to the graved.

H-re l-es l-i-i - - - -,

12/25/- -

Was read on the grave. It was so covered in snow, it was illegible.

"Tell me, spirit, is this _my_ grave?!"

The hood covering the spirit fell off. It had a crooked mustache, and a purple hat with an upside down 'L' on it (Waluigi).

Luigi screamed and fell backwards. The snow gave out under him, and he fell a long way into the grave.

/

Luigi woke up.

"Why... I'm alive! I survived through the night! But... I don't know what day it is!" Luigi rushed to his window to see Birdo walking. "Uh, excuse me, little boy... er, girl... er, whatever, do you know what day it is?"  
"What day? It's Christmas day!" Birdo yelled back.

"Christmas? The spirits must have done it all in one night! Excuse me, but do you know if the butcher has sold the prized turkey yet? Not the little prized turkey, the pig one?"

"Not yet, sir."

"Well go buy it, then!"

"Walk-er!" Birdo yelled.

"I'm perfectly serious! Go get the butcher and bring him here! I'll give you a coin for it!" Brido went off like a bullet, and came back with the butcher.

"Here you go. This'll pay for it. Now, bring it to Toad's house. Here, I'll give you an address."

\

Luigi went to dinner at Mario's and brought laughter and games. He donated money to the sports fund raiser, and had a well reputation of always knowing how to cheer up a Christmas.

/

Author's notes:

\

Starlll: Sorry I kind of cut it at the end there, I blame Obama.

Josh: Yup.

Starlll: Anyway, meet a guy from my school, SHADE BLADE!!  
Shade Blade: Do I come out now?

Starlll: Yes. Now, 1) Who is your favorite Mario character?  
Shade Blade: Obviously Luigi is my favorite character. To this date, I have beaten Luigi's Mansion 45 times and use him as main and best character in Brawl besides R.O.B.  
Josh: 2) What was your favorite Mario game?  
Shade Blade: Luigi's Mansion.  
Starlll: 3) When did you start playing Mario and Luigi games?  
Shade Blade: When I was like four years old. I started playing Pokemon first when I was 2, though.  
Josh: 4) How did you find out about Fanfiction?  
Shade Blade: I was writing some stories, and then I found about multiple sites that did it. I started writing stories based on video game series, and that has what led me to be awesome today in the realm of fan-fiction.  
Starlll: 5) What was your favorite one-shot so far?  
Shade Blade: My favorite one was the first one, about Luigi's Mansion. It perfectly described how he got into the mansion for the first time.  
Josh: 6) Who would win in a fight, a koopa or a parkaragoomba?  
Shade Blade: Paragoomba. Flying, brown mushrooms pwn little turtles any day.  
Starlll: 7) Do you think that having Baby Mario/Luigi and normal Mario/Luigi in the  
same game (aside from the one with the actual time traveling thing.) is  
weird?  
Shade Blade: I find it as a paradox. It's pretty odd how two universes collide, you know?  
Starlll: Am I the only one having trouble in English class?  
Josh: Wait... you're having trouble in English? Don't you SPEAK English?

Starlll and Shade Blade: Of course we does!

/

With Faedra:

\

Faedra: Candy land! (Runs to candy land, and starts eating a person's house.)

Gingerbread man: Hey! Stop eating my house!

Faedra: Sorry... say, have you seen a pink fairy?

Gingerbread man: No. No listen, none of this land has eaten in two days. We're starving here! Now you have to pay for what you did.

Faedra: Wait... if Candy land is going under tough times, why not just eat the houses?

Gingerbread man: They're either food or shelter, not both!

Faedra: Oh... (sees Flippy) there you are!

Flippy: Hey! (starts to fly away)

Faedra: Oh no you don't! (Catches Flippy in a glass bottle.)

/

Da' list:

\

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Andrew

3. Polocatfan

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane.

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Onatu

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. AvnVKai

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Solaris Prime

17. NinetailsGirl09

18. Michaiah

Faedra 369

Shade Blade

/

P.S. Andrew/Chrisms, if you want to guest star, you need to log in before sending a review. Sorry.

P.S.S.

Starlll: Huh, that's weird.

Josh: What?  
Starlll: Pax is on Shade Blade's favorites list.

Josh: Maybe he likes his stories.

(Moment of silence.) (Both start laughing.)

Starlll: (Wipes a tear from his eye.) No, but really, why do you think that is?

Josh: I don't know.

Pax: (runs in through a puff of smoke.) Help! Midna's after me again!!

Starlll: Girl troubles again?

Pax: Maybe... anyway, if you see Midna... well, you know what to do. This happened last chapter.

Starlll: Okay-

Midna: (holding a sledge hammer) I'm going to KILL YOU!!

Pax: I didn't decorate it! Help-

Starlll: (Stuffs Midna in a bag.) There.

Meanwhile, with Boogie

Boogie: (Hiding in a closet) I'm not going to get beaten up this episode... I'm not going to get beaten up in this episode...

Starlll: (Opens the door and throws Midna inside.) There!

Boogie: (Gets beaten up by a sledgehammer.)


	10. Another Stab at Mystery Geddit? STAB

Disclaimer: I don't own Mario or Luigi. I do however own Jason, Flippy, and Boogie. The people on Da' List belong to themselves (unless they are secretly slaves), and everything else belongs to Nintendo. Oh... yeah, and I don't own Jason Bourne (a movie chaaracter mentioned later in this chapter.)

Author's Notes:

/

First off, if you don't know what 'Loath' means, then go and look it up right now. You'll get the wrong idea from this song if you don't know what 'loathing' means.

It means hating, by the way.

\

(Starlll and Josh burst through the door, singing.)

Starlll:  
What is this feeling,  
So sudden and new?  
Josh: I felt the moment  
I laid eyes on you;  
Starlll: My pulse is rushing;  
Josh: My head is reeling;  
Starlll: My face is flushing;  
BOTH: What is this feeling?  
Fervid as a flame,  
Does it have a name?  
Yes! Loathing  
Unadulterated loathing  
Josh:  
For your face;  
Starlll:  
Your voice;  
Josh:  
Your clothing;  
BOTH:  
Let's just say - I loathe it all  
Every little trait, however small  
Makes my very flesh begin to crawl  
With simple utter loathing  
There's a strange exhilaration  
In such total detestation  
It's so pure, so strong!  
Though I do admit it came on fast  
Still I do believe that it can last  
And I will be loathing  
Loathing you  
My whole life long!  
Random O.C.'s:  
Dear Galinda, you are just too good  
How do you stand it? I don't think I could!  
She's a terror! She's a Tartar!  
We don't mean to show a bias,  
But Galinda, you're a martyr!  
Poor Galinda, forced to reside  
With someone so disgusticified  
We just want to tell you:  
We're all on your side!  
We share your;  
BOTH: What is this feeling  
So sudden and new?  
I felt the moment I laid eyes on you  
My pulse is rushing  
My head is reeling  
Oh, what is this feeling?  
Does it have a name?  
Yes  
Ahhh  
Random O.C.'s (BACKGROUND):  
Loathing,

Unadulterated loathing  
For her face, her voice, her clothing  
let's just say - we loathe it all  
every little trait however small  
makes our very flesh being to crawl  
AHHH!  
ALL: Loathing!  
STUDENTS: loathing  
BOTH: There's a strange exhilaration  
STUDENTS: loathing  
BOTH: In such total detestation  
STUDENTS: loathing  
BOTH: It's so pure, so strong  
STUDENTS: So strong!  
BOTH: Though I do admit it came on fast  
Still I do believe that it can last  
And I will be...  
Random O.C.'s (BACKGROUND):  
loathing...  
BOTH: loathing  
For forever...  
Random O.C.'s (BACKGROUND):  
loathing...  
BOTH: loathing,  
Truly deeply, loathing you  
loathing you  
My whole Life long!  
Random O.C.'s: Loathing ,  
Unadulterated loathing  
Starlll: Boo!  
Josh: AH!

Starlll: (smiles) Great song. Did I actually scare you?

Josh: No... is that... is that camera on?!

Starlll: (sees the camera) Oh... probably. (To the camera) We just saw the play 'Wicked', so we're still singing the songs. Great play... great play...

Josh: Anyway, onto the story!

/

Title: Another Stab at Mystery

OR: How the Crook stole Mario (and Toad)

Genre: Mystery (duh)

Setting: Toad Town, late Spring

Other: Luigi and Daisy are now back to speaking terms (for the first time since high school), but not really friends. Mario and Peach are married, and Toad is about to be (with the guy mentioned a few times before in previous chapters). It's the day before Toad's bachelor party.

This story isn't in order. I just thought I should point that out for those of you who get confused.

\

Every suspect was sitting in a room together. Four Toad cops were standing with guns ready in their holsters.

Luigi was pacing back and forth, looking at them all.

DK, Wario, Waluigi, Jason, and the rest of the Mario gang (Peach, Yoshi, and Daisy) were sitting in chairs.

"I think I've finally figured it out." Luigi said. Then he pointed at someone. "It was YOU!!"

/

_It was a dark and stormy night... but then again, it was Spring, so of course if was raining. And it was night time, so it's kind of a given that it was dark out._

_Toad was getting ready for his bachelor party, when there was a knock on the door._

"_Who is it?" The mushroom-headed man asked._

"_It's a-me, Mario!"The man on the other side of the door answered._

"_Come on in, the door is open." Toad answered. When Mario entered, Toad said: "I need to grab my boots. It's raining out and I don't want my Jimmie Chews to get wet."_

_Mario followed his gay friend uncomfortably up to the third story of the house. Toad was a fairly wealthy man, so he had a large house. He used the third floor as a type of giant closet to keep all of his clothes._

_Then suddenly, there was a break-in!_

_The window crashed open and then everything went black._

\

Three days earlier:

/

The Mario gang (Mario, Luigi, Toad, Peach, and Daisy, this time) were playing cards.

"I play a card face-down!" Luigi declared.

"I attack your face-down card with my 7!" Toad yelled.

Luigi flipped his card over, it was an eight. "Hah! I destroy your seven with my eight card!"*1

"Man, this is intense!" Mario exclaimed.

"Yah." Toad agreed. "By the way, whose coming to my bachelor party?"

Daisy and Peach couldn't because they didn't want to interrupt 'guy's night out', and Yoshi had to go to an island meeting to discuss how they could get rid of the monkeys, because they were ruining the tourist attractions.

"So I guess it'll just be the three of us." Toad said.

"I guess I'll be the designated driver, then." Luigi added with a light shrug.

"Why not me?" Asked Mario.

"Because your car is impounded. Remember? So, we'll take my car. Where do you want to go, Toad muh boy?"

"Well, there's a wine tasting down by Plaque Beach, and there's also a carnival at the corner of toad town..."

"Toad, this is your BACHELOR party. Your last chance to be totally crazy before you get married."

"Oh... right. Well, Carnival it is!"

/

\

An hour after the cops arrive to the scene:

/

\

"So, you wanna get some more donuts after this?" A cop asked.

"Na, ten's my limit." Another one answered.

"Fine. But you're gonna miss out. I hear that from 6:00 to 10:00, they use this awesome filling in the middle-"

"Will you two get on with it!?" Luigi shouted. "My BROTHER AND BEST FRIEND WERE JUST KIDNAPPED!!"

"Sorry. God."

Then a familiar penguin busted through the door.

"It is I! Pennington!" He shouted. "I'm on the case!"

There was a moment of awkward silence as Pennington searched the closets and used his magnifying glass to check the broken glass from the window.

"Rats! All that I found was some slobber on the floor! Well, I must go, for I must eat! I'm heading to the donut shop. I hear they have a new filling!" Pennington shouted and ran out the door.

Luigi searched over the wet saliva on the rug.

_Wait a minute!_ Luigi thought as he looked it over. _I remember a certain biker who hit poisonous bites!Wario could have bit them unconscious! But why? _Then, Luigi stumbled upon a note.

"_Bring two thousand dollers by Bumbel Woods three days from now if you ever want to see Mario and Toad again._" The note read.

The note was filled with spelling errors, just like Wario would do.

Luigi reported his findings to the cops, who took it gladly before joining Pennington on a trip to the donut shop.

\

10 minutes later:

/

Luigi was investigating the back of Toad's house, trying to figure out how a man as fat as Wario could manage to climb up to the third floor of Toad's house. There were no vines up the side, no rope, and no oddly shaped propeller mushrooms. He had a sinking feeling that Wario didn't do it.

But there was a high up electric pole, _and wires_.

But whoever did it would have to weigh less than a frog if they wanted to run across the poles.

Then a thought came onto him:

What if it was a two man job?

\

Starlll: So, I gave enough evidence in the story for you to figure out who kidnapped Mario and Toad. I'll tell you this, though: the people/person who did it are/is in that room in the beginning.

Josh: I'm bored.

Starlll: Anyway, good news! I got the game Mario and Luigi Bowser's inside story!

Josh: I'm bored.

Starlll: I don't like how they portray Luigi as an idiot, though. And it took me a really long time to beat the train. I mean, I knew that you had to use fire, not punch, but I was really bad at using the attack. And does anyone know what those clouds do that just rain?

Josh: No... I haven't gotten past getting the green shell.

Starlll: Ha ha.

Josh: I will beat you to the ground.

Starlll: Sorry, man.  
Josh: It's okay.

Faedra: I got her! I got her! (Holds up a pink fairy in a bottle.)

Starlll: That's not Flippy!

Pink Fairy: Hey!

Faedra: Oh... sorry, kid.

(Fairy runs off)

Starlll: Anyway, I found Flippy. She's at Pax's Truth or Dare story. I'll get her back when I visit again.

Faedra: Oh...

Starlll: Now... OUT!! (Kicks her out the door) Anyway, guess what I have taped on TV. THE BOURNE SUPREMECY!! YEAH, MAN!!

Josh: YEAH-YEAH!!

/

Meanwhile, with Boogie:  
\

Boogie: Ha! I'm not even on the show this episode! How will I get beaten up now-

Jason Bourne: Sorry, outta my way.

Boogie: (Does a loud ghost scream)

Jason Bourne: S(bleep).

(Grabs a weapon)

/

Da' List (I edited it. See if your place changed.)

\

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Nick

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparantly didn't want to.

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Andrew

7. Shane

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Solaris Prime

17. Michaiah

18. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

19. Faedra 369

NinetailsGirl09

AvnVKai

/

By the way, I noticed that nobody guest starred. If you want to guest star, you need to leave a signed review. By that I mean you have to log in before sending the review.

\

P.S. Next chapter is comedy night! Straight up comedy laughter! There will be gambling! There will be action! There will be romance! And... there will be a hell of a lot of laughter!

P.S.S. 6 pages! Yay!


	11. We're almost sorry

WERE SORRY(ish. Okay, I'm really not sorry at all. I blame bad government.)

Starlll and Josh: WE'RE SORRY.

Starlll: Okay, like you just read, we're not actually that sorry.

Josh: We don't like being sorry.

Starlll: "What are we talking about?" You may be thinking.

Josh: Well, our brilliant writer here forget to explain something to the readers. Tell 'em, Starlll!

Starlll: Ok, you see, I mentioned in last chapter that the next chapter would be a comedy night chapter! Well, I forget to tell you that it will be a truth or dare chapter! SO, send in your truths and dares (Note that there is a 10 dare/truth cap. Witch means, you can't send in more than 10 truths and dares total. And also, they must be able to fit in a K+ rating (although we'll be a bit loose about that.)

/

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Answers:

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WE(1)RE SORRY(ish. Okay, I'm really not sorry at all. I blame bad government.)

Starlll and Josh: WE'RE SORRY.

Starlll: Okay, like you just read, we're not actually that sorry.

Josh: We don't like being sorry.

Starlll: "What are we talking about?" You may be th(2)nking.

Josh: Well, our brilliant writer here forget(3) to explain something to the readers. Tell 'em, Starlll!

Starlll: Ok(4), you see, I mention(5) in last chapter that the next chapter would be a comedy night chapter! Well, I forget(6) to tell you that it will be a truth or dare chapter! SO(7), send in your truths and dares (Note that there is a 10 dare/truth cap. Witch(8) means, you can't send in more than 10 truths and dares total. And also, they must (9) able to fit in a K+ rating (although we'll be a bit loose about that.)(10. There was only one close parentheses when there should be two.)


	12. COMEDY NIGHT!

A/N

/

Note: This is the edited version.

Note: This is actually the second edited version. The first edit wasn't edited correctly.

\

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 1! (slaps a board)

Josh: Welcome to Fanfiction .com!  
Starlll: (Prompting) It's '.net'!

Josh: Oh, right! Fanfiction .com! "It's dot net!"

Starlll: Cut!

/

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 2! (slaps a board)

Josh: … … … line?

Starlll: (Prompting) Welcome

Josh: Welcome! … … … line?

Starlll: To.

Josh: To! … … … line?

Starlll: Fanfiction .net.

Josh: Something .net!

Starlll: Cut!

\

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 7! (slaps a board)

Josh: Welcome aboard the Fanfiction express! I'm your conductor! We're going to the North Pole-

Starlll: Cut!

/

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 34! (slaps a board)

(Josh is wearing a clown costume.)

Starlll: Cut!

Josh: What?

\

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 72! (slaps a board)

Josh: Okay, I'm gonna get it this time! No, seriously!

Starlll: Okay, fine. We're rolling.

Josh: Oh, we are? Uh... welcome to... a website!

Starlll: Cut!

/

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 92! (slaps a board)

Josh: Como estas! Yo soy tiene muy feo ojos! Tu es muy muy feo! Si!

Starlll: Cut! IN ENGLISH!  
\

Starlll: Fanfiction welcoming video, take 132! (slaps a board)

Josh: Oh! Is this the movie?  
Starlll: AUGH!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!! (Runs onstage) Welcome to Fan-freaking-fiction .net! I'm Starlll, and this is our special truth or dare episode!! Was that so hard?!  
Josh: I'm not perfect, you know!

(Long moment of silence.)

Starlll: Okay, I'm going to go to finish up the mystery chapter, first.

/

Luigi was waiting outside a trial room, when Jason was dragged in by two cops.

"What's he doing here?!" Luigi asked.

"This guy? He was one of Pennington's prime suspects!" A cop answered. Jason had a pair of handcuffs on his wrists, and a black eye. When Luigi further inquired about them, he explained simply: "He hit a cop."

"I didn't _know_ he was a cop!" Jason yelled. "He wasn't in uniform, and he didn't show me a badge! He just pulled out his mace and told me not to move! I thought he was a mugger, so I defended myself."

"You still hit a cop."

Then they all entered the room.

\

Every suspect was sitting in a room together. Four Toad cops were standing with guns ready in their holsters.

Luigi was pacing back and forth, looking at them all.

DK, Wario, Waluigi, Jason, and the rest of the Mario gang (Peach, Yoshi, and Daisy) were sitting in chairs.

"I think I've finally figured it out." Luigi said. Then he pointed at someone. "It was YOU!!"

/

Luigi was pointing at Yoshi.

"You used your tongue to capture Mario and Toad! That's why there was spit all over the floor! And you shot an egg at the window to shatter it, then flutter jumped in! You ate them, wrote the note (your English is terrible, hence the many spelling errors), then flutter jumped away! You needed the money to exterminate the monkeys on Yoshi Island! You said you were going to an island meeting that day to discuss it!"

Yoshi closed his eyes.

"Yoshi. Yoshi yoshi yoshi Yoshi yoshi yoshi Yoshi yoshi yoshi! Yoo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oshi!" (Yes! I kidnapped them! I was just doing what was right from my island! I'm so sorry!)

"Where are they?" Asked a cop.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi..." (In Toad's closet...) Yoshi said slowly.

"Dang! That was the one place I never thought to look!" Pennington shouted. "Oh well! Another case solved by: Greg _J_. Pennington! To the donut shop!" The cops stampeded to the donut shop, except for one who had to drag Yoshi to prison.

\

Epilogue:

/

So, Jason went to court for hitting a cop, and paid 500 coins in fines. Yoshi was sent to prison for five years, and Toad got married.

\

Now for the funny part!

/

Starlll: Okay, now we just have to wait for Pax the Dreamer to get here.

Silicon: Why?

Starlll: He's bringing his Wheel-O-Authors™.

Pax: (Jumps out of a delorian.) Thanks, McFly!

Mcfly: Anytime, Pax!

(Delorian flies away.)

Josh: Who's McFly?  
Pax: So sheltered. Anyway (Drags his Wheel-O-Authors™ (Copyright Pax & Travis Inc. 2009, All  
rights reserved) onto the stage.) here it is. Mind if I give it a spin?

Starlll: (Casually) Of course I do. (Spins the wheel.) And it is... Pax the Dreamer!

Pax: YES!! Okay, here are my dares!: Jason Bourne: Fight the Tails Doll.

Starlll: Wait, I need Jason Bourne, and the Tails Doll.

Pax: No prob. Allow me. (Tries to use his author powers, but fails) What?!?! HOW!!  
Starlll: Oh, well you see, I took away your author powers for as long as you're here.

Pax: (In tears) Wh-wh-why?

Starlll: Well... you do have a bit of a history...

\

Flashba-a-acks!

/

Pax lights Solo on fire.

\

Pax shoots Scypris (an OC of mine).

/

Pax kills a Terrorclaw.

\

Pax switches Starlll's dual lightsaber with a standard blue lightsaber.

/

Pax: Oh...

Starlll: Anyway... (Jason Bourne pops on screen.)

Jason Bourne: Where am I?!

Starlll: A truth or dare show! Think fast! (Throws a tails doll at him.)

Jason Bourne: D*MM*T!! (Shoots the tails doll rapidly.)

Tails doll: Play Wif me!

Jason Bourne: WHAT?! (Keeps shooting at the Tails Doll.)

Tails Doll: Play wif me! PWAY WIF ME!!

Starlll: Oh no! Here, let me help, Jason Bourne! (Throws his apprentice Silicon at the Doll.)

Doll: Pway wif me!

Silicon: Okay! Let's play! (Pulls out "Sorry")

Tails Doll: Yay! Let's Pway!  
Silicon: (Reads his card) Sorry! Bump one player back to start. Sorry, Tails Doll!

Tails Doll: (Angry) PWAY WIF ME!!

(Building blows up.)

(Everyone is still alive but Tails Doll.)

Pax: Wuh?  
Jason Bourne: I unscrewed the gas nozzle and put a magazine in the toaster.

Pax: Oh... well, I have another dare! Jason Bourne: Fight Luigi.

Luigi: (Pops on screen, using his poltergeist 30 00) YEAH!! YOU LIKE THAT, BOGMIRE-Where... where am I?

Jason Bourne: Why am I supposed to kill this guy?  
Starlll: Why did you kill that man and his wife in cold blood?

Jason Bourne: Hey! The Government told me so!

Starlll: Sorry-

Luigi: Take this (Jumps onto Jason Bourne's back.)

Jason Bourne: That's it! (Shoots Luigi.)

Pax: More dares! Jason Bourne: Fight Weegee.

(Luigi, or "Weegee" stands up again.)

Jason Bourne: What the heck? (Shoots Weegee.)

Pax: That's it! No more Mr. Nice Dreamer! Jason Bourne: Fight Chuck Norris.

(Chuck Norris pops on stage.)

Chuck Norris: Where am I?  
Pax: This is _goona be goo-oo-ood_!! !!

\

Two Seconds Later

/

(Chuck Norris is laying on the floor, dead with three bullets in his back.)

Pax: HOW?!

Starlll: Well, Chuck Norris is just a movie actor.

Pax: BUT SO IS JASON BOURNE!!

Starlll: No. Jason Bourne is a fictional character. Chuck Norris is a real person who is also an actor. Had you said **Colin Hendry**,THEN you would see an actual fight.

Pax: Darn these loopholes! Ah well. My next one will leave Bourne dead! Jason Bourne: Fight God.

Starlll: Which one?  
Pax: What?  
Starlll: How about we just go with the god I worship.

Pax: Okay...

(A man in a black Tux, black pants, paper-white skin, and a black-knit hat with a white feather sticking out of it appears.)

Fisticuffs: I awaken.

Starlll: (Gets down on his hands and knees.) Al mighty Fisticuffs, will you do us mortals a deed and fight this man? (Points to Jason Bourne.)

Fisticuffs: No. FISTICUFFS HAS SPOKEN!! (Dissapears in a bunch of orange teleporting-ray stuff.)

Pax: What?

Starlll: The God has spoken.

Pax: But-

Starlll: (Pulls out his dual-bladed lightsaber.) FISTICUFFS HAS SPOKEN!!

Pax: Okay, okay!! My next dare... Jason Bourne: Fight Jason Bourne.

Starlll: Okay... (An Italian waiter with a name tag labeled 'Jason B.')  
Italian Jason Bourne: Where-a am I-a?

Pax: Who's this guy?!  
Starlll: A guy named Jason Bourne.

Pax: Darn these loopholes!

(Jason Bourne shoots Italian Jason Bourne.)  
Pax: Okay... Jason Bourne: Fight Sir Starl!

Starlll: Okay... (Warps a minotaur-looking thins onto the stage.)  
Pax: What?  
Starl: Starl KILL!! (Jason Bourne shoots Starl.)  
Starlll: You see, I've created many ideas for what I would be like. That was my first idea-Star the first. Hence the one 'l'. I'm the third Idea I had for me to be like, hence the three l's. You only said one l.

Pax: Dang Loopholes! Jason Bourne: Fight Boogy.  
Starlll: Fine. (Warps Boogie on stage.)  
Boogie: Just make this quick.

(Jason Bourne kills Boogie, who respawns.)

Boogie: At least it was quick this episode...

Pax: Okay... question time! Josh: You seem like a funny guy. Why don't you have an account on this  
website?

Josh: Well, I do. I just never go on.

Pax: You should. Anyways, Sir Starlll: I need to advertise this, and you seem like the kind of guy who  
would like this. Play Legendary Legend. (I'll P.M. you the web address of it.)  
Starlll: I can't. Ever since the accident of '09, and the fact that my sister and I share this computer, I can't download anything.

Pax: What happened in '09?

Starlll: Well, we got some virus warning thing, showing us how many viruses our computer had. There were a lot. And most of them were at the "Critical" danger level. So, my sister, being the responsible person she is, blamed the entire thing on me. Now whenever I try to download something, my sister runs in and bites my head off and lectures me for half an hour about viruses and how if we lose this computer, we're screwed, and she'll pout for the next week and a half. In that order.

Pax: Oh... That's all. Pax is out! Peace!

\

Starlll: (Spins the Wheel-O-Authors™ (Copyright Pax & Travis Inc. 2009, All  
rights reserved)) And... Faedra!

Josh: Why don't _I_ get to spin it?!

Starlll: Because you don't do anything for the club. And whenever I bring that up, you just mumble about how you don't have enough time, and how you need to start getting better grades and crap.

Josh: (Seriously) But I don't have enough TIME to work on the Fan club! And I need to start getting better grades and crap!

Starlll: Anyway, the person it landed on was Faedra. Come on up, Fae!

Faedra: Hi there everyone! I'd just like to thank my mom and everyone else for supporting me-

Starlll: Get on with the dares!

Faedra: Sorry. Wait just a minute! You wrote in the last chapter, only 5 truths and dares TOTAL!! He did eight dares, and two questions!

Starlll: Yes, but the fact that Pax-man is awesome overrules that.

Faedra: What?! (Starts crying.)

Josh: Ah! Don't cry! I hate it when girls cry! Starlll, _DO_ something!

Starlll: Fine. (Tosses Faedra a bag of "M 'n M's")

Faedra: Yay- (Gulps down the entire bag in one bite.) Okay, my first dare is: Luigi: Run around (lemme think...fine...i don't know what its called) the biggest island with your negative zone, then dominate the world! MUA HA HA HA!

Starlll: Fae, that's two dares.

Faedra: Oh. Well, just do the first one then.

Luigi: Okay... (Uses negative zone, then runs around the island.)

Faedra: Is that it?

Luigi: Well... yeah.

Faedra: Oh. Well, Mario: PLAY CAR DODGE ON THE WORST HIGH-WAY EVER. EVER. PRONTO.

Mario: What?  
Josh: Go! (Pushes him onto a highway.) TAKE THAT, COMMIE!!  
Mario: No! (Gets hit by a car.)

Faedra: MWAHAHAHAHA!! GWAHAHAHA!! Starlll OR Josh (fight! loser has to do it!): *snickers evilly* SING AND DANCE BARBIE ON WORLD WIDE TV WITH THE WINNER RECORDING IT! =D

Starlll: Two dares again, Fae.

Faedra: Darn it! Well, just do the second one.

Josh: Not it!

Starlll: Fine, I'll be it. (Grabs a camera.) I'll be the one recording.

Josh: NO! (Seriously) But I don't have enough TIME to sing and dance Barbie Girl on World Wide TV!! And I need to start getting better grades and crap!

Starlll: Hey, I've been the one whose been busting his hump since we started this club!

Josh: (Seriously) But I don't have enough TIME to work on the Fan club! And I need to start getting better grades and crap!  
Starlll: Too bad. (Hands him a microphone.)

Josh: (Seriously) But I don't have enough TIME to to sing and dance Barbie Girl on Live TV! And I need to start getting better grades and crap!

Silicon: Pirating the airway in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Go!  
Josh: (Seriously) But I don't have enough TIME to sing and dance on live TV! And I need to start getting better grades and crap-

Starlll: DO IT!! (Holds up his lightsaber.)

Josh: AH!

_I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!_

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a blond bimbo girl, in the fantasy world  
Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly  
You're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamor in pink,  
kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky...  
You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"

(uu-oooh-u)

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

(Josh Singing in a deeper voice) _Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)_

Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please  
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees  
Come jump in, bimbo friend, let us do it again,  
hit the town, fool around, let's go party  
_You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"  
You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"_

Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
_(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)_

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!  
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)  
Come on Barbie, let's go party!  
(uu-oooh-u)

Silicon: (Unplugs the camera.) And we're out!  
Starlll: Now that I see it written out, that's actually a _really_ dirty song. Anyway, here you go, Fae. (Hands Faedra the camera.)

Faedra: YES!! HAHAHA!! (Trips over a bag of M n' Ms) NOO-OO-OO!! (Camera slips and breaks against the ground.) NO-OO-OO-OO-OO!! (Memory card flies through the air and Silicon swallows it by accident.) NOO-OO-OO-OO-OO!! !! !!

Starlll: Whoa! What bad luck!

Josh: Yeah!

Starlll: But still, by now there are probably like, 1 million youtube videos on it by now.  
Josh: No!!

Faedra: Dare Time! Mario: PLAY CAR DODGE AGAIN AND ADD BUSES AND TRUCKS IN WITH THE CARS ON THE WORST HIGH-WAY EVER. EVER. (de ja moo...)  
Starlll: Okay...

Mario: No!! (Gets hit by a truck.)

Faedra: Okay, Luigi: Beat Nintendo up with a fork =D  
Luigi: The company? How do I beat up a company?

Faedra: I dunno...

Luigi: And what if some security guards capture me?

Faedra: Oh... right...

Luigi: Later. I have to go take my brother to the hospital. (Leaves.)

Faedra: Bye everyone. (Leaves.)

/

Starlll: And next up is Solaris Prime!

Solaris: Okay, here are my dares! 1) I dare Wario to give 90% of his money to charity (I know he hates that, but if he's too stubborn, make 50%).  
2) A simple truth for Daisy. Tell me, who's your favorite partner when it  
comes down to doubles tennis?  
3) I dare Luigi to show his awesome courage and take a stroll around the  
haunted mansion, catching at least 15 ghosts with the Poltergeist 30 00 while he's  
at it. No problem for a star like him, right?  
Wario: Wait, so I only have to give away 50%? Okay... (Donates it on line to a Garlic Factory). Done! (Eats a ton of garlic then walks off, leaving a smell behind.)

Daisy: Okay, well, my favorite tennis partner? Probably Rafael Nadal or Maria Sharapova.

Starlll: What?

Daisy: They're the two greatest tennis players ever.

Solaris: I meant in the Mario world!  
Daisy: Oh. Then probably either Luigi or Waluigi.

Luigi: (Side) Yes!...

Starlll: Okay, Luigi, you have to suck up 15 ghosts. Have fun.

Luigi: Let's a go!

Mario: (From the hospital.) Hey! That's my line- (the heart monitor thing goes off.)

Josh: YES!! !!

\

Luigi: (Skipping down the hallway, humming.) Do-do-do-dodododo-dododadedadedo, do do do... (Sucks up four rat ghosts at once.) *4* Do do do doo doo da do... (Gets three orange ghosts in his stream at once, they go in different directions, and then they all get whiplash and get sucked in.) *7* (Sucks in 7 more bat ghosts.) Do-da-de-do... (Gets the ghost of Marley from 'A Christmas Carol' in his wind current.)

Marley: NO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!! !! !! I was your partne-e-e-er!!

/

Starlll: Well, that's all for today! Unfortunately, this is the end of comedy. But the next chapter will be awesome to! But the next chapter will not- WILL NOT- be a truth or dare from truthers and darers like yourselves. Sorry.

Josh: But I don't have TIME to do anything-

Starlll: Shut up, Josh.

Josh: But I don't have TIME to shut up! I have to- (Starlll puts duct tape on his mouth.)

\

Note: I am aware that Pax used 10, not 5. Well, because he broke that rule, he must be punished in the only way I know how to do over the Internet. SPAM!! Everyone, send him a message about how his life can change by changing his toothpaste! Now!

/

Da' List:

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1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Solaris Prime

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparently didn't want to.

4. Starlll

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Shane

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Andrew

17. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

18. Faedra 369

19. Michaiah

20. NinetailsGirl09

21. AvnVKai

/

Note: If you sent in dares, your place in line went up! Except for Pax. But hey, you're already at number three (Or at least, your spot holder is), and Solaris went into number 2, and MasterofHearts is has his spot laid in stone until he's back from wherever.. There for you to claim any time you want.

Note2: And Faedra, you moved one whole space! Baby steps first!


	13. COMEDY NIGHT! Part2

And now, for Starlll and Josh to discuss politics!

/

Starlll: Whoa! Has it really been Christmas since I last updated?!

Josh: No. The Truth or Dare, remember?

Starlll: Oh, right! I forgot! Well, I suppose that means I can procrastinate a bit more.

Josh: What does procrastinate mean? It sound gross.

Starlll: It means to be laz-

Josh: DON'T TELL ME!!  
Starlll: But it means to put off wor-

Josh: (Blocking his ears) Blah blah blah blah!!

Starlll: (Closes his eyes) I blame Obama for this...

Josh: Hey! Just because he's African-American doesn't mean he's bad!

Starlll: (Baffled) Why do you think that I don't like him because he's black?! I don't like him because he spent more in the first year of his term than our last president did in his entire _presidency_!

Josh: Oh. Well, let's write the next chapter. And stop using the word 'black'. It's racist.

Starlll: Not yet. First, 'black' is only racist if you use it demeaningly. Second, why do you think I didn't like him because he's black? I really want to know.

Josh: Habit. There are a lot of racist people in my school.

Starlll: Ah.

\

Comedy Night, Phase 2!

Genre: Angst. Comedy, duh!

/

Before we start: Let's see... it's been a few months since the Christmas ordeal, Luigi and Daisy are on speaking terms, Mario and Peach are married, and Jason is somewhere outside the Mushroom Kingdom.

\

Luigi walked on stage in a tuxedo.

"Hello. Please note the following warning: The following will be very funny. VERY funny. There will be some inside jokes with big Nintendo fans, but most will be pretty open-ended. Anyway, neither Sir Starlll nor Josh will be held responsible for the following:

1) Wetting your pants.

2) Juice squirting out of your nose.

3) Suffocation due to lack of air due to excessive laughter.

4) Giggling during school.

5) … Do I have to say it? Fine. Hippos stampeding over your house.

/

"So, there's going to be a party at your place?" Luigi asked Mario over the phone.

"Yup."

"There won't be any alcohol, right?"  
"Ah, live a little." Mario said, shrugging.

"Oh, I'm not afraid for me. You're the one who can't hold your beer."

"Yes I can!" Mario exclaimed.

"No. Remember the time we drove to Las Vegas?"

"...No." Mario answered, confused.

"Exactly."

\

The next day, Luigi drove down to Mario's house (He got a car to replace his go kart). It was about 6:00 pm., and probably around the same time Bowser did his daily sit-up. Also the time of day Toad practiced his tuba.

"MY GOD WILL YOU FREAKING KNOCK THAT OFF?!!?!!" Daisy yelled at her friend.

"But I have to practice!" Toad whined.

"I swear, I will shove your face down that tuba." Daisy warned. She was nice, but still had a temper.

"But my mushroom wouldn't fit." He pointed out.

"I'll rip it off fir-" She began.

"Whoa! Remember, you kill Toad, you're going to have a hell of a lot of paperwork to do." Luigi warned, appearing in the doorway.

"Yeah!" Toad agreed. "I'm a really likable person! And I'll haunt you silly! I'll be hovering over your bed, and I won't just make howling noises. I'll be a lot more depressing. And I won't just wear a robe. I'll be wearing a-"

"Fine. I won't kill you." Daisy mumbled. "But watch your back. I've seen your shoe collection, and I _know_ how much Peach would love to get a hold on them."

"You wouldn't..." Toad said, afraid.

"I would."

"Come on." Mario said. "Be nice. Or at least some variation of it."

"Wanna play Super Jumpman(1) Bros. Zii?" Luigi said, cutting into the conversation.

"Sure." They all said simultaneously.

/

"Stop jumping on me!" Mario yelled at his brother, annoyed.

"Sorry. I couldn't have made that jump without it, though!" Luigi said, defensively. "Plus, you had the propeller mushroom. Why didn't you use it?"

"It gives me another jump. Not wings."

"Personally, I like using the mini mushroom." Toad said. "It's great for water worlds, and you can float under or over enemies."

"And if you couple it with a star before you start a boss fight, it does wonders." Daisy added.

Then Peach stuck her head in.

"Help! Bowser is trying to kidnap me!" Peach yelled as Bowser pulled her into his clown car.

"Well that's just FREAKING PERFECT!!" Mario shouted. "Now whose going to bake the cake?!"

(Note: That wasn't supposed to sound sexist, it's just a known fact that Peach's only real skill (aside from writing letters while being kidnapped) is baking cakes)

"Look's like we're going to have to go the long way again." Luigi mumbled.

"That, or we could just use a warp pipe." Toad recommended. "That's how I get from castle to castle to point out that Peach is in a different castle."

"I'm sorry," Daisy said, not hearing him. "What'd you say?"

"Nothing."

/

And so they went on an adventure! Through the deserts:

\

"I'm going to die-a!" Mario said, exhausted. "Pasta... pasta..."

"Don't you mean 'Water... water'?" Daisy asked, drinking out of a water bottle.

"I said I'm going to die-a! You think I want water as my last meal?!"

/

Through the Oceans:

\

Mario was the only one wearing a penguin suit. Daisy and Luigi just drifted in small rowboats.

"Whoa!" Luigi said, pointing to a giant penguin-eating fish. "I told you it was real!"

"Yeah!" Daisy exclaimed as Mario swam under water. "That sucker's bigger than the boat!"

/

Through the icy tundras:

\

Mario still had his penguin suit on, while a bunch of penguins surrounded him, holding bats.

/

Over the rainbow on clouds:

\

"Say," Daisy began. "How can we walk on clouds?"

"Aw hell." Luigi groaned, eating a propeller mushroom.

"What?" She asked.

"You jinxed it."

Then Luigi grabbed Daisy's arm and used the propeller mushroom to float to safety while Mario fell 200 feet to the ground.

/

Inside volcanoes:

\

Mario had a bandage on his head, a cast on his left arm, and was on crutches.

"Run Mario!!" Luigi shouted as the volcano began to erupt.

Mario started to quickly limp his way over a bridge, and was swallowed by lava right before getting off.

/

And finally, to Bowser's Castle:  
\

Mario still had his previous injuries, plus all his hair had singed off.

"I'm sorry." Toad said, walking on the screen. "The princess is in a different castle."

"ARE YOU GOD DAMN KIDDING ME!!?!!" Mario yelled.

/

To a different castle:

\

"Gwahaha!" Bowser yelled. "I stole princess Peach! And I've though this through! I've set all my minions on the OUTSIDE of this castle, so that way I won't have any assistance! AND, I'm sitting on hard solid rock, which can only be destroyed by ONE object: an ax."

"Uh," Luigi started to point out that he just told them how to beat him.

"Say, where did I put that ax, anyway?" Bowser asked.

"Right here." Daisy said, picking up a golden ax.

"NO!! WAIT!! I'M NOT OFF THE ROCKS YE-" Mario yelled as Daisy broke the platform.

"GWAHAHAHA!!" Bowser shouted. "I have the key with me! If I go down, so does the ke-"

Needless to say, they fell into the lava as they were cut off.

"We probably should have though about how we'd get in before we beat bowser up." Luigi said.

"Got it covered." Daisy said, using the ax to break down the door.

On the other side of the door was Peach in a hot tub. (Reread chapter 5 (the comet) if you forget)  
"I can explain." She said.

"No need to." Pennington said, running in. "You were clearly put in that hot tub because Bowser wanted to cool off when he got out, and you broke out of your cell and fell into the pool while escaping!"

There was a moment of silence.

"Sure..." They all said, simultaneously.

"So how do we get back?" Luigi asked.

/

Back at Mario's House:

\

"Oh. That's how."

"The doctor called." Toad said, pulling cupcakes out of the oven. "Mario has severe burn marks, three broken limbs, a fractured toe, and a twisted spine."

Peach spat out the water she was drinking in a thin mist.

"Are those _chocolate_ cupcakes?! I love chocolate!"

/

Authors Notes:

\

Starlll: Some of my better pieces, if I say so myself.

Josh: You know, I wonder what would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other...

Starlll: (Snaps his fingers) Josh! Focus!  
Josh: Sorry.

Starlll: Okay, so now we try to figure out who is better: Luigi or Mr. L.

Boogie: (Entering and shutting the door behind him) Honey! I'm ho-o-ome!

Michaiah: (Bursts in through a door, trampling over Boogie) MR. L!! MR. L!! MR. L!! MR. L!! MR. L!! MR-

Starlll: (Pushing her through the door, stepping on Boogie) Out! Out!

Michaiah: MR.L!! Mr. L!! M- (gets shoved out the door)

Josh: God, fan girls can be so annoying!

Starlll: Hey! Don't mock the reviewers!

Josh: I'll do whatever I dang like!  
Starlll: (Shocks him with the Force) Take it back.

Josh: Never!

Starlll: (Shocks him with the Force) Take it back. Now.

Josh: OW-OW-OW!! OO-OO-OOW! OUCH!!

Starlll: (Shocks him with the Force) Take it back. Come on.

Josh: OW OW OW!! I TAKE IT BACK!! I TAKE IT BACK!!

Starlll: Good. Now feel free to have a cookie.

Boogie: (Starts to get up) I'm oka-

Josh: Cookies! (Runs over Boogie)

/

Da' List:

\

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Solaris Prime

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparently didn't want to.

4. Michaiah

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Starlll

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Andrew

17. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

18. Faedra 369

19. Shane

20. NinetailsGirl09

21. AvnVKai

/

Notes: Well, Michaiah Moved WA-A-AY up! I mean, it's pretty easy to move up. I feel bad for anyone near the bottom. Really. I mean, if you're at the bottom, then you _clearly_ have no real skill at moving up in lists.

\

(1) "Jump man" was Mario's name in the first game he was ever in. (Donkey Kong)

/

\

P.S.

Pax: (Jumps out of a Delorian) Thanks, Mcfly!  
Starlll: What are you doing here?!

Pax: Well, I've just been appearing so much...

Starlll: Out.

Pax: But I-

Starlll: SCYPRIS!!  
Scypris: (Pulls out an assault rifle) Out, Pax.

/

Finish that pleasant scene however you want.


	14. Valentine Zombie Day Thriller MashUp

Note: The following chapter makes fun of many of the readers (and a few people who haven't read this in a really long time) to this story. Anyway, _**I SWEAR, IF ANYONE WHINES ABOUT HOW I MADE FUN OF YOU, I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL WAIT A FULL WEEK BEFORE EVEN CONSIDERING WRITING ANOTHER CHAPTER.**_

\

_**I SWEAR, IF ANYONE WHINES ABOUT HOW I MADE FUN OF YOU, I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL WAIT A FULL WEEK BEFORE EVEN CONSIDERING WRITING ANOTHER CHAPTER.**_

/

_**I SWEAR, IF ANYONE WHINES ABOUT HOW I MADE FUN OF YOU, I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL-I WILL WAIT A FULL WEEK BEFORE EVEN CONSIDERING WRITING ANOTHER CHAPTER.**_

\

A/N

/

Starlll: (Reading a book) _In a city called Stone town, near a port named Stone town Harbor, a boy named Renie Muldoon was preparing to take an important test. It was the second test of the day- the first had been in an office across town. After that one he had been told to come here, in Monk Building on Third Street, and bring nothing but one pencil and one rubber eraser, and to arrive no later than one o' clock. If he happened to be late, or bring two pencils, or forget his rubber eraser, or in any way deviate from the instructions, he would not be allowed to take the test, and that would be that. _

_Renie, who very much wanted to take-_

Josh: This is boring! I thought you said this book would be good!

Starlll: It _is_ good. It's great! You just have to wait for it to start!

Josh: I don't care! Just go write the next chapter of the fan club or something!

Starlll: Fine. You know, you're almost as impatient as Pax!

Josh: (Sniff) That has to be the most insulting thing you ever said to me...

Starlll: I mean, patience is a virtue- oh look! I puppy! (picks up a dog and starts petting it) Ooh, it's so cute! Yes you are, puppy! Yes you are!

Silicon: (Snaps fingers) Focus!

Starlll: Right! (puts down the dog) Anyway, instead of just rushing into the chapter like I usually do, I have a plan for this story!

(Whispering)

Josh: Okay! I get ready!

Starlll: And I'll write the next chapter!

Silicon: And I'll get the donuts!

Starlll: Good! Now let's go-go-go!

\

Title: Valentines Zombie Park Day Thriller Mash-up (With Luigi!)

Genre: Romance, Horror, Action, Blueberry pie

Applesauce: No go! No go on the applesauce!

Plot: This is dropped right in the middle of a zombie invasion. A bunch of zombies have swarmed Luigi's mansion, with Luigi (duh), Mario, Daisy, Jason/Comet, and Peach inside. The five have been pushed up to the top floor of the mansion, and with nowhere left to run, they must fight their way out...

/

"We have nowhere left to run!" Mario yelled, slamming the door to the inside closed.

"Good. Now that we all understand the obvious," Jason said. "We're going to have to plan a way out."

"Hey! There's a fire escape right here! We could use it to climb down-" Toad started.

"Okay, it looks like we're going to have to fight!" Luigi declared. "Come on. Peach, take this tennis racket. Daisy, you get the golf club. Mario, you can use this spare fire flower. I'll use this penguin suit, Toad can use this old sword hanging up for no particular reason. Jason, I'm afraid we're all out of weapons."

Jason shrugged.

"It's okay. I'll use my fists."  
"Wait!" Toad yelled. "Where are you getting these weapon-"

"ONWARD!!"

\

Note: It is reccomended that you play the song that I write before each floor of the mansion. It adds to the effect.

/

\

Floor #3

Song: Thriller, by good ol' Michael Jackson

/

The group continued to run at the zombies, hacking the head or body off of each creature they saw.

_It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark  
Under the moonlight, you see a sight that almost stops your heart  
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it  
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes  
You're paralyzed  
_ Luigi froze a zombie about to attack Daisy from behind. Then he grabbed the zombie-now-frozen-in-a-block-of-ice and threw it down the hall, knocking down every zombie like they were bowling pins.

"Don't worry." He said to his ex-girlfriend. "I won't let anything happen to you."

Daisy gave a hesitant half-smile, then they continued to charge through the hall._  
'Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about strike  
You know it's thriller, thriller night  
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight  
_ They were now on the balcony.

Peach used her tennis racket to swat away the dead creatures like flies, some into the unicorn statues, some into walls, and shoving some to trip over the the flower pots.

"Yaa-aa-aah!!" She screamed, knocking the head off one.

But while she was defending herself, another flesh-eater grabbed her from behind.

Peach wrestled it to the ground, and then flipped it over the railing of the balcony._  
You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run  
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun  
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination, girl!  
But all the while you hear the creature creeping up behind  
You're out of time  
'Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl  
Thriller, thriller night  
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight  
_ Jason slammed one head with his fist, then as it bent over in pain, he shoved it into another ghoul like a battery ram. Then Comet ripped the arm off of one like it was Velcro, and used it like a... long... striking object. When the arm was no longer proving useful, he threw it like a boomerang and kicked down another flesh-eater._  
Night creatures calling, the dead start to walk in their masquerade  
There's no escaping the jaws of the alien this time  
(They're open wide)  
This is the end of your life  
They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side  
They will possess you unless you change that number on your dial  
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together, yeah  
All through the night I'll save you from the terror on the screen  
I'll make you see  
_ When the balcony was clear, they waited a second.

Two seconds.

Three.

Mario sighed in relief. It was getting overwhelming for a moment there.

They wiped dirt off their clothes, and continued to floor two._  
'Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
Girl, I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try  
Thriller, thriller night  
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller, ow!  
(I'm gonna thrill ya tonight)  
Darkness falls across the land  
The midnight hour is close at hand  
Creatures crawl in search of blood  
To terrorize y'alls neighborhood  
I'm gonna thrill ya tonight, ooh baby  
I'm gonna thrill ya tonight, oh darlin'  
Thriller night, baby, ooh!  
_\

Floor #2

Song: Holiday, By Greenday

/

_Say, hey!  
Hear the sound of the falling rain  
Coming down like an Armageddon flame  
The shame, the ones who died without a name  
Hear the dogs howling out of key  
To a hymn called "Faith and Misery"  
And bleed, the company lost the war today  
_ They ran down the stairwell, hoping that they had just taken down the mass of ghouls on they way down. They were wrong.

A group of zombies, bigger than before, charged after them. They weren't too much bigger, just a few inches. But they still were a lot better at fighting, and Mario had to pull out his secret weapon.

"SUPER..." He shouted, his eyes glowing. "HIYAA-AA!!"

A massive spiral of flames twisted out of his hands, burning any flesh-eater in their path to the ground. Some tried to run while on fire, spreading it to more ghouls, who spread it to more ghouls, and so on.

"Why didn't you do that before!?" Luigi asked, putting out a burning wooden table with his penguin suite.

"It's a final resort. I doubt I can do that again for a while."_  
I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies  
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives  
On Holiday  
Hear the drum pounding out of time  
Another protester has crossed the line  
To find the money's on the other side  
Can I get another Amen?  
There's a flag wrapped around a score of men  
A gag, a plastic bag on a monument  
_They busted through the door, and Daisy clubbed a ghoul in the head with her golf club. Then she pounded down another in the legs, causing it to trip. Then she did the same to another zombie and it landed on the first one. The then hit it in the back with her club rapidly again and again like one would step on a giant spider.

"Who said golf is a boring game?" She asked, hitting another flesh-eater in the stomach.

"Remind me never to get you angry again." Comet said, smiling._  
I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies  
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives  
On holiday  
The representative from California has the floor  
Zieg Heil to the president gasman  
Bombs away is your punishment  
Pulverize the Eiffel towers  
Who criticize your government  
Bang, bang goes the broken glass  
Kill all the fags that don't agree  
Trials by fire, setting fire  
Is not a way that's meant for me  
Just cause, just cause, because we're outlaws, yeah  
_"You want some of this?!" Jason screamed, kicking one in the stomach. "Come get it! You know, you're lucky! Most people only get to die ONCE!!"

Comet grabbed one by the legs, slammed it into another like a bat, and then threw it into another group coming in through the door._  
I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies  
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives  
I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies  
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives  
This is our lives on holiday _

"We're good!" Luigi yelled, gesturing to the door. "Let's go!"

\

Floor #1, ground:

Song: Boulavard of Broken Dreams, by Greenday:

/

_I walk a lonely road  
The only one that I have ever known  
Don't know where it goes  
But it's home to me and I walk alone  
_ They ran into the foyer, ghouls streaming out of doors and even a few through the windows.

Luigi froze a few coming in through the stairwell, hoping to stop passage, but that was no good. They just shattered the moment another zombie shoved it._  
I walk this empty street  
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams  
Where the city sleeps  
and I'm the only one and I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk alone  
_ Toad stabbed down one ghoul with his sword, only for another to take it's place.

"If only we could get out of here!" He said to himself. Then he realized: The door."WELL DUH!!"

Then a massive, 10 foot-tall zombie burst through the ground. It swatted Toad away from the door, and began pounding the ground with his fists.

"YOU WILL DII-II-EE!!" It shouted._  
I walk alone  
I walk a...  
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me  
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating  
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
'Til then I walk alone  
_ Mario and Luigi put all firepower on it (or... ICE power, in Luigi's case. Ha! I'm so punny. You know, I heard somewhere that a pun is the lowest form of humor. Aw well.), hoping they could get it to die. Well, die again.

That didn't work.

The zombie held up Mario and Luigi, Toad was unconscious, leaving only Jason, Daisy, and Peach to fend off the flesh-eaters._  
Read between the lines  
What's *#* up and every thing's alright  
Check my vital signs  
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk a...  
_"There are too many of them!!" Toad yelled.

"You think we didn't notice that?!" Luigi asked, freezing the giant zombie.

Comet closed his eyes.

"They're after me!" He yelled. "Not you!"

Then, he ran into the giant zombie, not putting up any resistance._  
_ Jason died._  
I walk this empty street  
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams  
Where the city sleeps  
And I'm the only one and I walk a...  
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me  
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating  
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
'Til then I walk alone...  
_ The effect was almost instant. The moment Comet fell to the ground, so the the zombies. They all either disintegrated, dived underground, or just ran out the door or a broken window.

Then brown blood -not red, BROWN- slowly trickled out of him as he turned to ash as well and blew away.

…

…

…

…

…

"What... the hell?" Daisy asked.

\

"You see," Professor Gadd said, almost a week later. "I don't think Comet was human." Everyone gasped. "You see, I don't even think he was from this _planet_." Everyone gasped even louder. "You see, that meteorite that you all discovered a few months ago had Jason inside; hence his nickname 'Comet'. He was encased inside and, odds are, was sent to probe the mushroom kingdom.'

"He wasn't the same species as shroob, though. I can assure you that. I tested some of that odd colored blood you found, which had a surprisingly high amount of iron in it. I might as well have been hacking through a nail. Then there was the silver hair. Well... I mean, there was SOMETHING odd about it, right?'

"But we can't forget, there was a reason why Bowser wanted it. Maybe he hoped to make an alliance with the aliens. Or destroy them.'

"Now, for the zombies. That, I don't understand fully. Perhaps after being on a foreign planet for so long, ions of unknown energy revived them. But I can conclude, Jason was indeed, an alien." E. Gadd let the information sink in.

Mario was the first to recover.

"Daisy kissed an alien! Daisy kissed an alien! Daisy kis-" Mario chanted, only to get bunched in the face by Daisy, then slapped in the back of the head (knocking his hat off) by Peach.

/

Starlll: Okay! So, Comet was an alien! Who knew?  
Josh: You did...

Starlll: Yeah, I know... Anyway, you wanna interview a guest star?  
Josh: Yeah!

(Moment of silence)

Starlll: So...

Josh: So what?  
Starlll: YOU WERE IN CHARGE OF GETTING THE NEXT GUEST STAR!!

Josh: So's your mom!

(Long moment of silence)  
Starlll: That didn't even make sense.

Josh: So's your mom!

Starlll: You need to get better jokes.

Josh: So's your mom!

Starlll: You're as annoying as Faedra!

Josh: So's your mom!

Starlll: That's it. (Pulls out a lightsaber)

Boogie: (Running in front of Josh) Okay, beat me up. Get it over with.

\

10 minutes later:

/

(Josh and Boogie are laying on the floor)  
Starlll: Well, that takes care of that. Now where can I hide the bodies...

(Starlll's friend from school, Devin, sticks his head through the door)

Devin: Hey, (Starlll's real first name is censored), here's your Super Mario Bros. Wii back!

Starlll: (Before Devin can see them, Starlll throws a blanket over the two unconscious people) Thanks. Say, you like Luigi, right?

Devin: Sure do!

Starlll: Okay, would you mind answering a few questions?

Devin: Sure!

Starlll: Okay, what's your favorite SMB game?

Devin: Super Mario Bros. Wii!

Starlll: Favorite Luigi moment?  
Devin: Uh... (thinks) when Luigi saves Daisy in that Mario game. What's it called again...

Starlll: SMB 2, was it? Anyway, Have you ever had a dream about Luigi?  
Devin: Yeah. I was wearing his green 'L' hat, and I killed Mario.

Starlll: (A bit creped out because he dressed as Mario for Halloween) Okay... do you by any chance have any Aztec gold I can borrow?

Devin: (Thinks) Yeah. But it was cursed.

Starlll: By Tim the Dead Fish?  
Devin: Yup.

Starlll: I'm a man. I'll tough it out.

\

Da' List

/

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Solaris Prime

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparently didn't want to.

4. Michaiah

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Starlll

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Andrew

17. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

18. Faedra 369

19. Shane

20. NinetailsGirl09

AvnVKai

Shade Blade

Sean

\

That said:  
Starlll: What happened to all my reviewers?! I mean, yeah, they're still on the list, but check out how many PEOPLE are reviewing! In the first few chapters, I had tons! The number of reviewers is going down! So, I'm going to take it out on Faedra.

Faedra: WHAT?!

Starlll: Yes! I'm taking away all of your M and M's!

Faedra: NO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!! !!

Starlll: Yes. Also, though, you moved up on "Da' List"!

Faedra: YES!!

Starlll: Be quiet! You're as annoying as Michaiah! I mean, honestly!


	15. Dashing Through the Racetrack

A/N

Starlll: IM BA-AA-ACK!!

Josh: From where?

Starlll: Didn't you notice I was gone?

Josh: When were you gone?  
Starlll: I was gone all week! Then after that, school bombarded me with work! No Internet, no e-mails, and no Fanfiction!

Josh: How long?  
Starlll: I just told you: A week, followed by almost a month.

Josh: Oh. Where.

Starlll: The Bahamas!!

Josh: Cool. Wanna play some Super Smash Bros.?

Starlll: Heck yeah! But first, I must check my e-mails, and listen to some Pterodactyl Squad. Okay... (turns on some Pterodactyl Squad music) ah... utopia. Now for some e-mails... I've been gone all month! I bet I have a million e-mail-

George the computer: You have THREE new e-mails.

Starlll: Oh. That works, too. Let's see... whoa! Some guy is just reacting to that instant message ad I sent to the first 50 people in the archives when we first started this story! Wow! Okay... a review... and... Pax started ANOTHER story?! What's wrong with you, Pax-man!? Fisticuffs!

Fisticuffs: (Appears in a shining orb of light) Yes?

Starlll: Oh, sorry. I just used your name to put emphasis on my anger.

Fisticuffs: Fine. (Dissapears in the same shining orb of light as before)

Pax: (Appears in a puff of smoke) Is someone ripping off my gimmicks?! If you start mumbling about how you're protecting everyone's dreams and use "whose game show is this" as an excuse for everything, I'll SUE!!

\

Disclaimer: I don't own Luigi, Mario, Rosalia, Daisy, Peach, Bowser, Toad, and all others belong to Nintendo, not me.

/

Title: Dashing through the Snow, in a 50 Horsepower(1) Bike...

Genre: Action

Plot: Yes, I'm putting an actual plot from now on instead of letting you figure it out from the title.

Other: It takes place about 3 months after the "Valentines Zombie Park Day Thriller Mash-up (With Luigi!)" chapter.

Plot 2: Wait! I forgot to write the plot last time a few lines up! Darn!

\

Track Two:

/

Luigi was on his bike, in the second lap of a race. It was also the second of for different tracks, all which he knew he had to get in the top 3 if he wanted to at least qualify for a medal or trophy. And getting a trophy was very important to him, as he had made a bet with himself:

If he won a trophy, then he would take it as a sign that his luck had turned, and would ask Daisy on a date again.

The track was Toad factory. Not a very difficult place, but the mud, turns, and cool-looking machines made it a nice crowd opener.

Luigi took a sharp right turn and then pulled a wheelie while he drove past several weird crushing things. He cringed as a steel-flattener slammed down behind him, and put his foot on the gas peddle. The sooner he got out of there, the better.

Luigi passed Toad and then sped onto the conveyor belt of boxes, likely packed with red mushrooms or shells. He swerved to avoid a box and just barely missed it. After that, he took a curve around a wall and went across one of two paths, both parallel. One was red and would slow you down, and the other was green and would speed you up. However, every lap the tecnitions would change which path sped you up, so Luigi had to take a chance, and took the left path. He blinked deeply to moisten his eye from the wind wiping into it from his new speed boost.

Luigi then went over a long jump and over a mud pit. He stayed next to the wall where the mud was shallow, though, and kept most of his speed.

He went over the line marking that he was on the final lap, which wasn't very different from the first.

Luigi made it to the conveyor belt, and was in fifth place. He had to start moving quickly if he wanted to win. He grabbed a green shell out of a mystery box, and then threw it at one of the crates on a conveyor belt. A mushroom fell out of the crate, and then the green man (not Link) used the mushroom to do a temporary speed up.  
When he finally finished, he was in third place.

\

Track 3:

/

The next one was Mushroom Gorge.

Luigi flipped over the first giant mushroom, then quickly gunned his engine as he landed. Then he did a short left turn, and flipped over a red mushroom, bounced off the top of a green mushroom(3), and flipped over another red mushroom.

Luigi gunned his engine again as he landed, passing Peach, then DK, bringing him into 6.

Then there was a slow matter of getting into a cave. It was lighted pretty well, due to the many cameras, but there still was a certain matter of not bumping into walls and stalagmites and stalactites(4), and landing on the bouncing mushrooms. If he fell off of them, he would be forced to drive through a deep mud pit, slowing him down greatly. He took a lower path to his right, avoiding a danger altogether.

Luigi noticed Daisy chasing after Toad over the left, higher trail. The left path appeared to be quicker than the one on the right, which Luigi made a mental note of.

The karts ran across another lap, Luigi going into 5th place. He cut across a hidden path, 'cheating' his way into 4th, before entering the cave again. This time, though, he took the left side. Luigi barely made it across, but he still did. The risk was worth it, as it ate up a lot of the distance between him and the person in third.

He swerved to avoid a few rouge goombas that apparently like to wander in the middle of a high-speed race track, and hit one on the top of his head with his fist for good meas-

\

Plot3: Okay, the plot is about Luigi racing in a few Mario Kart stages. If he gets a trophy, he's going to take it as a sign that his luck has turned and he's going to ask Daisy out on a date. (Hits a buzzer with a clock attached to it) Yes!

/

-ure.

"Come on..." He thought out loud, and reached his hand out for an item box. Inside of the box was a mushroom, which he used right away.

There was a second where he was right next to Yoshi, tied for third, but then he carried on.

The crowd cheered as Luigi pulled into third, ending the race.

\

Race 4: Bowser's Castle

/

Luigi knew he was in the deep end when he saw the final track. He zipped past a fire breathing statue of Bowser, avoiding the flames by a few inches, and he could feel the heat beating off his neck.

Luigi ducked his head as he flew over a bridge, hoping not to fall off. He got inside the castle itself, though when he did, he wished he hadn't. The inside was covered in thwomp blocks.

"Ugh!!" He shouted, swerving to avoid one falling down in front of him. He kept moving though, doing his best to stay away from the blocks. On his left, he noticed a thwomp inside a cage. Luigi began to wonder why it was there, when suddenly he realized he had to make another sharp turn.

It was difficult to make the various turns in such close hallways, but do-able. He avoided slamming into walls, and then slammed on his brakes, just stopping in front of another thwomp.

Luigi sighed, and continued driving.

He passed the line, showing that he was on his semi final lap. Toad began to pull up behind him.

"Take this!" Toad yelled, shooting a red shell at him. But he was too close to Luigi, so the shell went straight for the person in third place.

Toad followed Luigi, only a few yards behind him.

_Okay, he wants to tail me?_ Luigi thought. _Then let's see him get past THIS_!!

The green man drove past the statue, right before it breathed out fire. Toad got caught up in the flames, while Luigi sped by.

Luigi began to catch up to Mario, (who was in third), when Rosalia caught up to them.

"You're going down!" She yelled.

"Shut up!" Mario replied, as the three group together. "Honestly, when did you get here!"

"That's it," She said. "I'm going to win this!"

"Ah, you're just angry because you got put in the heavy weight group!(5)" Luigi answered.

Mario and Luigi slammed into either side of Rosalia, until she was forced to pull on her brakes. Then Luigi grabbed an item box and pulled a banana out of it. He threw it in front of Mario, causing him to lose direction.

The last lap, unfortunately, wasn't as eventful.

But, nevertheless, Luigi got into second place.

\

"YES!!" He shouted, as he received hid trophy.

Now, he could ask Daisy out.

/

Author's notes:  
Starlll: I know, I know. I suck at writing races. I blame my upraising.

Silicon: Okay.

(Long moment of silence)

Starlll: What?

Josh: We need a joke for this chapter.

Starlll: Oh. Well, I'll sleep on it. Pax, update soon!

\

Josh: (Playing Mario and Luigi, Bowser's Inside Story on Starlll's DS) *Mumble* Starlll, how do I beat this boss?

Starlll: Figure it out.

Josh: Fine... *grumble*

Starlll: Anyway, the chapters are going to keep coming... uh... I have to wrap this up within 5 minutes if I want to make the deadline, so later!

/

1- I have No idea how much 50 horsepower really is.

2- I can't find where this is...

3- In the game, it's actually red-green-red.

4-Stalagmites are the ones on the ground, stalactites are the ones on the ceiling.

5- I've been wanting to make that joke for a while...


	16. Just Flipping BurgersEdited

A/N

(Starlll is in English class, all view of his face obscured by a nerds head.)

Mrs. Russel: (In a monotone) Um, so, Tom Sawyer then passed his paint brush to the other child... um,

so he used physiology to get others to do his work for him. Um, like he was... (Voice fades out)

Starlll: (Writes a few more tallies on a scrap of paper) (Thinking) _Okay, I'm up to 14 "Um's", and 9 "Like's". I wonder how many Devin has counted._ (1)

Devin: (I go to school with him. Remember? He guest-starred a few chapters ago?) (Thinking) _Man, this is SO boring! I'm beginning to think eating my own leg would be a better way to spend my time! Wait- did she just call on me? Oh crud. Oh crud. Play it out. Play it out. She was talking about fences when I nodded off. _

Starlll: (Thinking) _Oh no! Devin needs my help! Jedi-Man to the rescue!_ (To Shade Blade, right behind him. I go to school with Shade Blade. He guest starred a few chapters ago. Remember?) Hey, tell Devin the answer while I distract the teacher.

Shade Blade: 'Kay, man.

Starlll: (Loudly) OH MY GOD!! I JUST SAW A DOG KILL A CAT OUTSIDE THE WINDOW!!

Mrs. Russel: What? Really? Oh my gosh! Where is it... (Voice fades out)

Shade Blade: (Whispering to Devin) Hey, man. The answer is that Tom Sawyer used reverse physiology to trick others into doing work for him.

Devin: Thanks man.

(Shade Blade gives Starlll a nod)

Starlll: Whoops. Must have been a trick of the light. Sorry.

(Everyone stops crowding the window)

Mrs. Russel: (Glares at Starlll) If you try to interrupt class again, it'll be detention.

Starlll: Yes, ma'am.

Mrs. Russel: Good. Now, Devin, what was the answer, again?  
Devin: Uh... Tom Sawyer tricked his friends into doing his work for him...?

Mrs. Russel: Good. Now... (voice fades out)

Starlll: (Thinking) _Okay... she just said Um. That brings me up to 15..._

Devin: (Thinking) _Okay, she just said Like again. I put another tally here..._

Shade Blade: (Thinking) _I really got to stop hanging out with these guys..._

\

Title: Just Flipping Off the Burgers

Plot: I thought up this idea ten seconds before writing the title. You see, SOMEBODY #coughMariocough# got a little into gambling, so the rest of the gang decided to help him pay off his loan. Unfortunately, the best jobs they can get is working at the Sonix down the street. I mean, Mario may have had like, a billion jobs in the past (reread the interview in ch. 2 if you forget) , but the rest have no real experience.

Grape Juice: Personally, I prefer apple juice.

/

"Grugaluga...(buzz)...grapaglarglangar...(static)...and a small orange juice." The voice crackled through the drive-through.

"...What?" Peach asked for the third time.

"GRUGALUGALUGALUG!! (Static) … GURGA-#*#*LARG!!" The man screamed.

"Large cheeseburger? Got it. Please move to the next window." Peach instructed, nodding.

"Gragalag."

\

Mario was humming a small ditty while sitting in a fry-oil.

"Uh... Mario?" Toad asked, standing next to him. "I don't think you should be sitting in that."

"WHAT?" Mario asked, shouting over the bubbles.

"YOU SHOULDN'T BE SITTING IN THAT!!" Toad screamed.

"Okay," Mario said, hopping out. "No need to shout."

As Mario got out, the bubbles stopped.

Toad closed his eyes and walked out.

/

"Okay." Said the manager, wiping sweat off his forehead with a huge, meaty hand. "The chief is coming in today, and I want this ship to be in tip-top shape! You get it?" Then he inhaled through his nose, sucking in the mucus.

"Why. Is. This. Guy. Our. Boss!?" Daisy asked, hitting her head against a wall between every word.

"Hey!" Toad shouted. "I just painted that wall!"  
\

"Here he comes!" The manager shouted as a limousine pulled into the driveway.

Then Sonic got out of the limousine.

"Wuh... but... SONIC?!" Mario shouted.

"Well DUH!! Who did you think ran Sonix? Knuckles?" Toad asked.

"." (Okay-now-we-have-to-make-sure-that-this-building-has-been-properly-conducted-so-that-we-can-be-safe-financially.) Sonic shouted.

"Whoa." The manager said. "Sonic must be talking slowly for us!"

/

"." Sonic explained as he ran into the back room (Alright-now-we-have-to-view-and-value-our-burger-making-process-so-that-we-may-receive-full-marks-from-the-health-inspector).

"Uh..." Toad said, and began to make a standard cheeseburger.

"Nononononononono!" (No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no) Sonic shouted. "!" (You-put-the-bun-then-the-meat-then-the-cheese-then-the-tomatoes-then-the-onion-THEN-the-fake-mustard) Sonic explained.

Toad followed Sonic's example and Sonic nodded vigorously.

"GoodgoodgoodgoodgoodGOOD!!" (If you can't read this one, then you're not very quick.)

\

Sonic lead them through the restaurant, talking so quick, Luigi wondered if Sonic was, ahem, ON something. Something that rhymes with "slugs".

"Okay !" (Okay, goodbye, so long, farewell, I hope I never have to see you again) Sonic shouted, leaving the building, and getting into his limo.

"That was so embarrassing." Mario said, putting his head in his hands, "I was just made a total fool of in front of my rival. My god, it's like there's some all-powerful being, who has it in for me!"

"Now, I'm sure that the author isn't mad at you." Peach said, patting him on the back.

"I guess..."

"HEY!!" A customer shouted, angry. "My fries taste like fart!"

"What?" Luigi asked, walking over to the customer.

"These fries taste like fart!" He repeated. "Here, try some!"

Luigi ate a few of the man's fries, then held back vomit.

"Oh my god! How did that happen!" Luigi asked.

"I don't know. Maybe you SHOULD CHECK BEHIND THE COUNTER IN THE FRYING OIL!!" The disgruntled customer shouted.

"Wait." Toad said, approaching the scene. "Daisy, what oil station did you fry that in?" Toad asked, afraid.

"Four, why?"

Toad hesitated.

/

Note: If you didn't get that, read the part where Toad yells at Mario to get out of the frying oil more carefully.

\

"We'll give you a ten dollar discount!" Toad shouted, afraid of the demotion he might get.

"But the whole meal only costs four bucks." Mr. Disgruntled Man pointed out.

/

"I can't believe that they did that..." He mumbled as they raised the price up to twenty dollars.

\

/

"So, we only have to work one more day!" Mario said, happily. "Then we should have enough to pay off my debt!"

"So, I say we all get to work early tomorrow." Luigi suggested. "No point in wasting a perfectly good afternoon."

And so they all got to work early the next day (with the exception of the manager, who was busy fighting a giant rat with his level 24 imp, on his game, World of Witchcraft), and started to work shifts.

"Grugalargulug." Crackled the drive-through.

"Fried-egg sandwich with a strawberry milkshake. Please drive to the next window." Peach said. Then she shouted: "I got a fried egg in a blanket and pink cow juice!"

"On it." Daisy said, flipping the fake egg onto a bagel.

\

"Um... excuse me, boss?" Mario asked, holding his hat and standing in the manager's doorway.

"Hey!" The manager shouted, and sucked in more mucus. "Can't you see I'm on my quest to fight the evil overlords?!" He shouted, typing furiously on his computer. "No! Not fireball! Fire bird!"

"Um, boss, I need to ask you something." Mario repeated.

"What?!" He shouted, clearly losing his match in World of Witchcraft.

"I need a raise-" He began.

"Yeah, sure!" The manager replied, not listening.

"Thanks!" Mario started to leave, but then realized how much he could profit from this situation. "Oh, and can you sign this check for a thousand dollars?"

"Yeah, just leave me alone!!"

"Thanks! And can I get my next three Christmas bonuses in advance?"

"FINE!!" Then the manager pounded the keyboard with his fist. "AUGH!! Why won't this troll die?!!"

"Maybe it will if you sell me your car for two dollars." Mario suggested, and the manager give him the deed to his car. "Now go and dye your hair purple."

Mario laughed as the manager ran to the dye store.

"Sports car, 2 dollars. Fixing the laptop? 250 dollars. Making an idiot of your superiors?" Luigi asked, standing in the doorway. "Priceless."

"There are some things you can't buy," Mario agreed. "But for everything else, there's managers."

"Well," Luigi said. "All together, we now have your debt payed off, and nothing is going to happen now!"  
"Yeah! Absolutely nothing bad is going to happen. Especially not right now."

"Nope. Nothing at all."

Then, suddenly, a giant dragon(2) busted through the wall. The dragon had two small-ish wings, a long S-shaped body, two weird legs that looked like bug-feet on a drawing of a three-year-old, and concentric V's all over his torso area. Oh, yeah, and just for fun, let's throw in a really muscular arm sticking out the back of his neck. (3)

Everyone screamed and ran away.

"OH COME ON!!" Mario yelled as the dragon set his money on fire. "I THOUGHT THAT THIS IS WHERE THE AUTHOR GETS LAZY AND JUST ENDS IT AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE!!"

Then the dragon walked away, slowly wading into the ocean in order to burninate Japan for the massive delays on Pikmin 3.

"King Trogzilla..." Toad hummed. "King-king Trogzilla... supreme!"

/

Epilogue:

And so, Mario got his left index toe shot off before paying the rest of his debt in full, due to a sudden treasure hunt. But that is another oneshot, for another time.

But you know what I don't get? If you owe money to a gangster, and he shoots one of your toes off, why do you still owe him the money? Seriously?

\

A/N  
Starlll: I have some bad news for you. I accidentally spent all day yesterday playing video games.

Josh: Oh, come on, man!  
Starlll: Hey, I'm sorry! It was an accident. You see, I had just beaten King Shiskebabo, a boss from Little King's story, who I've been trying to beat for a year and a half, give or take a few months. Probably give, considering how many times I gave up on the guy. But anyway, April 18th will be glutton day, where I do nothing but eat and laze around all day!!

Flippy: Hey!

Starlll: Right, I'd best get to the point. Anyway, my mom says that I play too many video games now, so I have to actually DO things today!

Everyone: (Gasp)

Starlll: So, anyway, I'd best end this before I get as whiny as Fae.

/

Meanwhile, with Faedra:

\

Faedra: (Crosses arms) I don't like food anymore!

/

1) I actually do this in English class sometimes. It helps me stay focused and amused.

2) I got bored here.

3) TROGDOR THE BURNINATOR!!

\

Da' List:

Because I forgot to post this last chapter and nobody commented, I'm not going to post it THIS chapter, either!

/

P.S.

Starlll: Wait, where's Boogy?!

Pax: I think I saw him in one of my stories.

Starlll: When I get my hands on him...


	17. Treasure Hunt pt 1

A/N

Starlll: Due to an idea sent to us by a reviewer, this chapter is going to be a tourney of Nintendo Tag team players versus Sega characters! Isn't that right, Andrew?

Andrew: (With a mask over his face, hanging upside down) Wh-where am I?

Starlll: (Holding a blunt object in his hands) You're here on your cameo, remember, Andrew?

Andrew: Whu-whu-what? (Sobs) I don't know what's going on!

Starlll: You suggested that we have a tag team tourney, and that you and Luigi beat Josh and I, then you beat Luigi, the guy who we BASED THIS FAN CLUB ON! Correct, Andrew?  
Andrew: I take it back! I take it back!

Starlll: Now, I don't think that you can do that. Am I correct, Joshua?

Josh: (Holding a bat) Yes, you are right.  
(Long moment of silence)

Starlll: You're supposed to end your lines with someone's name, stupid!

Josh: Oh, sorry, I mean, yes, you are right, Sir Starlll.

Starlll: Good boy, Joshua.

Pax: Can I get in on some of this? (Pulls a katana out of his pocket) I even have my own weapon!

Starlll: Woah, what are you doing here!

Pax: Well, I'm here so often... in fact, I think I might live here...

Starlll: Huh... weird. Anyway, sure. Go for- wait, no. Give me that! (Takes the katana) use this (Hands him a boxing glove). We're going for torture, here. Not Insta-death.

Flippy: Hey!

Starlll: Oh, right. We're going for torture, here. Not Insta-death, Pax the Dream Keeper.

Josh: That is better, Sir Starlll.

(Flippy picks up a frying pan)

(All four slowly surround and circle Andrew)

Andrew: Help...

\

(Everyone is cleaning up the torture room (yes, I have a torture room))

Starlll: (moping the floor, which is red) Okay, everyone! Just a little bit more...

Doorbell: Ding-Dong!

Josh: That must be the guest star!

Pax: Oh no! We still haven't cleaned up the ceiling!

Starlll: On it. (Opens the door, letting King Boo inside) Hey, guess what! The word "gullible" is written on the ceiling!

King Boo: SURE it is! Seriously, I'm not going to look up there, man. I'm not gullible.

Starlll: Ooh, you're just too good for us! I guess our joke won't work.

King Boo: No, no it won't. I'm too smart.

Starlll: (Winks at everyone and motions for them to keep cleaning) Okay, let's get you into the T.V. Setting room and get you ready for the show while we do the one-shot!

King Boo: Sure, man.

/

Title: Treasure Hunt!

Plot: It's a treasure hunt! I thought that would be easy to figure out. I guess I was wrong.

Genre: Action!  
Other: No, I don't think there's anything else I need to specify.

\

"So, Mario, when are we going to get around to cleaning out the attic?" Luigi asked his brother one day.

While Mario and Peach may have been married, Luigi still lived with his brother. It may sound strange, but it was more like some old-fashioned sitcom show. That's a good idea. Huh...

/

New title: Buddies

Theme song:  
You go to the bar,

and all you hear,

'these guys complaining 'bout their families...

But what happened to the family love,

Of which we used to...

uh...

CUT TO THE T.V. SHOW!

\

"Hiya, Mario!" Shouted Luigi. "It's a-me, Luigi!"(Laughing cue)

"Hiya, Luigi!" Shouted Mario.

"Hey, what's cooking?" Luigi asked. (Laughing cue) "Literally!" (Louder laughing cue)

"Hi everyone!" Shouted Peach. "I'm baking a ca-ake!" (Laughing cue)

/

(1)

Starlll: Man, that. Was. Great. I have a feeling that I'm going to make a lot of money off of that idea. But anyway, back to the treasure hunt!

\

Back to the Treasure Hunt!:

/

Where was I? Oh, right, it was like a sitcom show. So anyway, Mario and Luigi had lived in the same house for all their lives, but they were still getting around to cleaning the attic. Sad part is, they've 'still been getting around to it' for almost 20 years.

"I dunno." Mario said. "Hey, maybe we can get Toad to help us out! Gay people like cleaning things, right?"

"Hey!" Shouted Toad, who was just entering through the door. "That is a gross stereotype, and it was extremely unfair!"

"You're right." Luigi said. "We're really sorry. Hey, for a 'we're sorry present', you wanna help us clean out our attic?"

Toad happily nodded.

"Sure!" (2)

\

The next day:

/

"My gosh, how could you get this place so dirty?" Asked Toad when the finally got into the attic.

Mario and Luigi shrugged simultaneously, and they gradually began cleaning it. Luigi had the duster, Mario had to lift boxes, and Toad organize the room.

"No, put the Christmas boxes next to the Easter boxes!" Toad shouted. "I don't know how many times I have to say it, you don't put the happy holidays next to the scary holidays."

Luigi began digging through a large pile of sentimental junk, throwing Mario's old stuffed Marshy the Mushroom Man doll into the trashcan. He dug under several school play costumes, a rubber roach, a wig, a lint ball, a pakemon toy, and a few Yu-pi-doh trading cards. He hummed the song 'Memories' while he dug through the toys, and a few old candies that got old and stuck to the bottom of the box.

"What's this?" Asked Luigi to himself.

He pulled a few papers out and looked at them. "Hey, Mario, what's this?"  
"I DON'T CARE ABOUT ORGANIZATION UP HERE, I'VE BEEN WITHOUT IT FOR 20 YEARS- I'm sorry, what was that, Luigi?" Mario asked, and he stopped yelling at Toad.

"Do you know what these papers are?" Luigi repeated. They looked like maps of Mushroom Kingdom and the surrounding area.  
"They look like maps of Mushroom kingdom and the surrounding area." Mario said, repeating the narration.

"Yeah, I thought so. But what are these X's for?" He asked.

"Look, you want to skip the process of slowly figuring it out and just get to the treasure hunting?" Mario offered.

"Heck yeah!" Luigi agreed.

\

"In a jungle far from the reaches of civilization, two brothers wandered through the skies clad with leaves of trees and animals of wonder and excitement-"

"Will you knock that off?" Asked Mario, annoyed with Luigi's narration.

"Make me!" Luigi replied, and ducked under Mario's fist. "Okay, sorry!"

The two brothers followed the map through the jungle. It was difficult to trudge through the mud and tall grass (especially with all of the bugs and ticks getting down their clothes), but after an hour or two, they managed to figure out how to avoid most of the 'perils' of the jungle.

But they had just started what was to be a long and dangerous adventure...

/

Starlll: And cut!

Josh: We finished cleaning the room.

Starlll: Good. What did you do with the rest of the fruit smoothie that got splattered everywhere because the blender broke?  
Josh: We filled up a few cups and gave one to Andrew.

Starlll: Good. I know I'm angry with him, but I'd hate to be a bad host.

Josh: Yeah.

Starlll: Anyway, for our guest star... King Boo!

King Boo: HI!

Flippy: Hey! Look!

Starlll: You're right, Flippy! I forgot that this is KING Boo, and not a Luigi fan!

Josh: Get out of here!

(Everyone pulls out a poltergeist 3000)

Pax: Night night...

\

Starlll: Crud! We need another guest star!

(Long moment of silence)

Josh: We gotta think on our feet here... (Pax raises his hand) who... (Pax starts waving his hand) who... (Pax starts jumping up and down) I know!

Pax: Yes!

Josh: (Whispers something to Starlll) Like the idea?

Starlll: One of your few moments of brilliance, Josh!

Pax: Me... me... me...

Starlll: FLIPPY!

Pax: WHAT! But... all she ever says is 'Hey' 'Look' and 'Listen'!

Flippy: Hey!

Starlll: I agree, Flippy, I can feel your pain.

Pax: Fine. I don't need this, anyway! (storms out)

Josh: You think we should go after him?

Starlll: Nah. He'll be back. They always come back... Anyway, Flippy, when did you first get into Underground Luigi Fanclub?

Flippy: Hey look listen look hey!

Starlll: Oh, right, Chapter 2. I forgot.

Josh: Which was your favorite one-shot?

Flippy: Hey, look listen look hey look!

Josh: Mine, too.

Starlll: Who would win in a fight, Luigi or Ghost Luigi.

Flippy: Hey! Look!

Starlll: Where! (looks out the window, and sees Luigi fighting Ghost Luigi.) Cool.

Josh: Why did Tael break up with you?

Flippy: (Begins throwing jars and frying pans all over the place) HEY LOOK LISTEN HEY HEY LOOK LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN HEY LOOK!

Josh: YOU actually broke up with HIM, because he cheated on you with Navi? That's terrible!

Starlll: Do you by any chance have a Boogie mask I can borrow?

Flippy: (Hands him a boogie mask)

Starlll: Thanks. (Puts on the boogie mask)

Boogie/Starlll: Hi everybody! I hope that I don't get totally beaten up- (a truck breaks through the wall) WHAT THE HECK! THIS IS THE THIRD FLOOR- (Gets run over)

/

1) I'm not making fun of sitcoms, here. In fact, 5 out of 10 of my top 10 TV shows are sitcoms (Friends, Will and Grace, Frasier, Everybody loves Raymond, and Cheers)

2) I'm not prejudiced towards gay people. I'm actually kind of disappointed in myself that I made that joke, now.

\

Da' List:

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Solaris Prime

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparently didn't want to.

4. Michaiah

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Starlll

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Riku's Music Lover

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Andrew

17. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

18. Faedra 369

19. Shane

20. NinetailsGirl09

21. AvnVKai

22. Shade Blade

23. Sean

24. Devin

/

P.S. A letter from Boogie:  
Hi, everybody! It's me, your friendly neighborhood ghost! Anyway, because I get beaten up every chapter, I decided to take a vacation to Klooper's vacation home for accident-prone people! I'll be back after I finish my spa treatment and my many 'I'm not a loser, I'm happy, and proud of it' exercises. See you soon!

From, your pal,

Boogie


	18. Treasure Hunt pt 2

A/N

Starlll: (Dressed in a red boxing costume with red boxing gloves on, no shirt, black gym shorts, and a wrestler's mask with a blue gem in the top) (Checking his e-mails, and singing a show tune) I've got an e-mail in my pocket, and I think it's starting to melt!

E-Mail:

Dear Star Bad,

I herd that Josh is quieting the fanclub! Is this true? I hope it isn't. Josh is my favorite character! Aside from Flippy, of course.

From,

Tom Glamor

/

Star Bad: Glamor? Seriously? I hope you aren't planning on becoming a pro wrestler with that kinda' last name. No, Josh isn't quieting the Fanclub. He's generally pretty loud during just 'bout anything. Really. He's not quitting the Fanclub, either. I'm kicking him off. Why? Cuz he hasn't done ANYTHING since the beginning of the club! I mean it, anything! His two-month grounding that he got when the club started (due to something involving grades and school) wore off months ago, and he could care less! I warned him. Guess what he did:

\

Flashbaaaaaack!

_Me: You wanna work on ULF?  
Josh: Meh...  
Me: Come on.  
Josh: Ugh...  
Me: Come on. You haven't done anything for it since it started.  
Josh: Meh...  
Me: I will stop you from being my cohost.  
Josh: Yeah, right. Who had this idea?  
Me: Who did something about it?  
_[Josh doesn't speak.]

_Me: Don't think I won't. Now will you do something?_

_Josh: _(Sighs and rolls eyes)_ I'll do something later._

End of Flashbaaaaaack!

/

Star Bad: So, I checked, and guess what: he DIDN'T do something later! The nerve of it!

(Flippy walks in wearing a yellow costume of some sluggish creature with black spots on the back and an flat, diagonal head)

The Flip: Hey! Look listen!

Star Bad: Yes, I know, I read the e-mail. You're his second favorite.

(Boogie floats in wearing a costume with elephant feet and a white head.)

Boog Sad: I'm sad that Josh is gone...

Star Bad: Shuyddup, Boog Sad! (Punches him in the face)

(1)

\

Starlll: But my problem remains! I need a new co-host! Man, I wish I could find someone to help out... I know! A contest!

/

Treasure Hunt pt. 2:

\

"The two brothers traveled through the jungle. Cut off from all signs of intelligent life, with only but the clothing on their back, a treasure map, and a dream." Luigi narrated. "They were forced to sleep under a sky filled with hundreds of stars, as if a child had taken a paper shredder and dragged it across the sky. But the success of a night only made them feel more determined to come to the treasure, and, to a further extent, their destiny."

"Okay, Luigi, PLEASE knock that off!" Mario shouted.

"Sorry, forgot that it annoyed you." Luigi apologized.

"No, not that. THAT!" Mario shouted the last word, pointing to a gigantic three-foot-long spider on his back.

"HOLY (bleep)!" Luigi shouted, staring at it. He kicked the spider, which quickly jumped off right before the green man made contact (in result, Luigi's foot made contact with Mario. Hard.)

"Ugh!" The spider screamed. "Don't kill me!" Now that the spider was on the ground, they could get a clear view of it. It had a yellow bow tie, and eight tiny eyes, which all blinked at the same time. It's hair was a gray-brown, which was more matted than normal spider hair, which would just flop about every which way. "My name is Nigel Legs. I meant no harm when I latched onto you, I just needed a ride to the lake!"

Mario, getting off the ground from the impact of Luigi's foot, dusted himself off and asked:

"How did you know we were going to the lake?"  
"I didn't. It's just what bugs do. We assume people are going places. Why do you think they grab onto random windshields?" Nigel shrugged. "Anyway, sorry for the trouble." Nigel started to walk away.

"Wait!" Luigi called after him. "Can you tell us where the mountain caves are?"

"Why? Oh, wait, are you looking for the treasure?"

"Whu... bu... how did you... ?" Mario shuddered.

"Oh, most people who come this deep into the jungle are looking for it." Nigel said with a shrug. "We usually just lead them in the wrong direction. I mean, it's not like we have any use for it. And... well, why do they deserve it?"

There was a moment of silence.

"We could give you a cut of the treasure." Luigi offered.

"Did you not hear what I just said? We have no use for it. What would I do, start a tour business for people to see the jungle in a safe way at a modest price?" There was a long moment of silence. "I love it. Okay, let's start hunting!" Nigel said.

/

"The two brothers and the arachnid, Nigel, head further for the mountain caves. With every turn, with every breath, they slowly wander closer to the caves, and, to a further extent, the caves. But deadly creatures and traps lurk in every shadow, just waiting to strike. The two brothers and the arachnid must be cautious and careful if they are to escape." Luigi narrated.

"Stimulating!" Exclaimed Nigel.

"Be glad I didn't bring a shotgun." Warned Mario, annoyed.

"Don't be a buzz kill." Luigi said, rolling his eyes.

"IN-deed." Nigel agreed.

They trekked up the mountain, and saw a cave.

"Five bucks says that the author was too lazy to make an actual challenge-" Mario began, then was fried by a bolt of lightning, eaten by bears, vomited up, burned to a crisp by the dragon that appeared in the end of the 'Just Flipping Off Burgers' Chapter, an anvil fell on his head, and he drowned in a river. Twice.

"Remind me never to make the author angry." Nigel said to Luigi.

"Word." Agreed Nigel.

"True dat."

Then they were both struck by lightning.

**Use proper grammar! Who are you, Faedra?** (2) Shouted the author, from the sky.

\

The three walked through the cave, jumping at every sound, movement, or sudden draft.

"AH! Draft!" Mario shouted, jumping and hitting his head against the ceiling.

"How are those scary?" Luigi asked, walking.

"Well... I mean, they... well, why are spiders scary?" Mario retorted.

"Have you seen them? They're all hairy and gross, with eight scrawny, bony legs. And their eyes, they look like a bunch of pins were injected into their heads. And don't even get me started on the webs. Ugh, the webs. They look like the signal of doom-" Luigi was suddenly cut off by Nigel clearing his throat loudly. "Oh, I mean, don't get me wrong, it looks good on you."

/

Finally, they made it about halfway when they came to a sudden dead end.

"Where do we go now?" Asked Luigi.

"I dunno. I mean, we explored the entire cave, and I haven't seen anything so far." Nigel said.

Luigi shook his head. It was almost pitch black, save for two flashlights that Luigi and Mario brought from home. Luigi slowly moved his flashlight over the walls, searching for any detail. Nothing. Then, frustrated, he flicked his light across the cavern a few times. Wait. When he moved it faster, the light seemed to jump from higher to lower. But if he moved slowly, he didn't notice the overall change. It was like looking at a character in a sitcom's face. Their face in the first episode was a lot different than the one in the last episode. But if you watch every episode of ever season, from beginning to the end, then you don't notice any change. But if you watch the first episode again, after just watching the last one, you see a change. It was the same with this wall.

Luigi kept flickering his light, until he saw the largest change, then felt it was his hand. It was an inlet, only a few inches wide, but deep. It seemed to be an extension of the cave. That was probably the next step to the treasure.

"Mario, Nigel, come check this out!" Luigi shouted, and showed them his finding. Both tried to fit through the crack, but like I said: only a few inches wide. Mario had cut the diet Peach was trying to force him onto, and Nigel's abdomen was too big.

They all stared at each other, when suddenly it dawned on them.

"Paper Mario!" They all shouted, and Mario turned into his paper counterpart, and squeezed through the crack. Then, a pink bomb popped out of the back of his shirt.

"Never make me go back there again!" She shouted.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just blow up that wall!" Mario muttered.

"You suck, you know that?" Then the pink bomb blew up, opening the crack.

"Thank you." Mario said, starting to turn into 3-D Mario again.

"No-no-no-no-no-" The bomb was sucked back into Mario's head.

"...I'll never understand how that works." Luigi mumbled, walking through the now-opened path.

\

They walked through the dark lighting. Their flashlights had stopped working, so they couldn't see very well. And for some reason, Mario kept feeling a chill down his spine.

_Get oooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuut... get ..._ It was if it was whispered into his ear, by some unknown force. Mario shook it off, telling himself that it was his imagination.

_Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet of heeeeeeeereeeeeeeeeeee..._

Mario trembled, in the dark. He knew he couldn't take it much longer. He began rubbing his gloves together, the friction keeping them warm.

_GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET OOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUT!_ The voice screamed in his ear. Mario jumped, and ran out of the tunnel, Luigi and Nigel chasing after him to see what was wrong.

"Have to-have to stop... have-to-stop playing... Fallout 3 late at night..." Mario stuttered out while a spirit slipped back into it's home.

/

They eventually calmed down from Mario's freak-out, and continued on. For some reason, after they left that room, their flashlights had started working again, as if nothing had ever happened. It seemed as if the cave was getting lighter, instead of darker, though. They kept going through the tunnel, it slowly narrowing in on them.

"I have a bad feeling about this..." Luigi whispered.

"Me too, bro." Mario agreed. "Luigi..."

"Yeah?"

"If I don't make it out alive..."

"Yeah...?"

"I'm the one who broke your Bintendo Zii..."

Luigi glared at Mario.

"Do you forgive me?" Mario asked, hopefully. Then Luigi kicked him in the stomach (he had much better leg muscles than he did in his arms), then threw him onto the floor.

"I had a country-wide high score saved on that Zii before you broke it!" Luigi shouted, while Nigel held him back.

"Woah whoa whoa." Nigel said, breaking the two up. "Save the killing each other for later, when it's over billions of coins in inheritance."

The two glared at each other, and eventually nodded and continued walking. They were brothers, you can't expect them not to fight, and not to make up.

Anyway, where was the narration, again? Calmed down... flashlights worked... oh, right, the cave was getting lighter. The tunnel seemed to have faint shards of light flickering from above, but not true light. It was as if something was reflecting the light. The three stopped walking when they saw it, and, eventually, shivering, Luigi took the first steps. He slowly turned around the corner, and Nigel and Mario could hear him gasping for air.

"It's... it's... GOLD!" He shouted at the top of his lungs. Instantly, Mario and Nigel ran in.

An intense wall full of the golden colored stones surrounded them, the brilliant sparkling color embedded in the walls of the cave. Their treacherous journey finally came to a close! It was the end! Or... it WOULD have been the end, but Nigel realized something that changed all of it.

"Wait! Wait... this isn't gold! This is Pyrite (3)!"

There was a long silence. Mario and Luigi both stopped in their tracks, unmoving except for the occasional darting of their eyes. They didn't even breathe. Slowly, Luigi broke the silence.

"I... I... are you sure?" He asked.

"Yes, of course. The texture, the weight, it's all off. No, real gold it smooth and lighter than this."

They were heartbroken. Mario had been hurt the most of all. LUIGI WAS GOING TO GET HIS OWN HOUSE! LUIGI WAS GOING TO MOVE OUT!

"Well... I guess that means we keep moving, then." Luigi said, slowly taking a step forward. No, this wasn't the end. Not just yet.

\

(Starlll and co. (aside from Josh, of course) are inside of a giant red and white striped tent, with a huge audience around them. Starlll is on stage, with Flippy and Boogie sitting in chairs in the background.)

Starlll: Come one! Come all! To the Underground Luigi Fanclub Co-Host Tryouts! It's very simple! You just have to answer the following questions! And don't worry about me playing favorites! Because I won't be the one picking my own co-host!

Audience: WOOOOO-WHOOOOOOOOOO!

Starlll: That's right! Instead of me, FLIPPY THE FAIRY will be choosing instead! Give it up for the lovable, pink ball of glowing light, FLIPPY!

Flippy: Hey! (Waves to audience with wings)

Audience: Look! (Everybody points to Flippy)

Boogie: Ha. Ha. Ha.

Starlll: ANYWAY, now on to the acts! Go! Lion tamers!

Boogie: AUGH! (Runs away from Lions) Ha! You won't get me now- (gets mauled by clowns) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

/

Question sheet:

Who is, without a doubt, the coolest guy around?

Aside from Starlll, who is, without a doubt, the coolest guy around?

What are you expecting for pay roll?

What is your favorite Luigi moment?

Why do you want to be my co-host?

Are you willing to be made fun of?

How do you feel about these new curtains?

Now for a voice check, sing a song!

NOW LEAVE AN ACTUAL REVIEW AFTER ANSWERING THE QUESTIONS! I don't wanna see a bunch of people just giving me answers, I want a real review! Come on, people!

\

Da' List:

1. MasterofHearts1313

2. Solaris Prime

3. I WANTED to put Pax here, but he apparently didn't want to.

4. Michaiah

5. Josh

6. Nick

7. Starlll

8. -DreamScheme-

9.-Paper-Luigi-66

10. Shade Blade

11. Faedra 369 (Slowly moving up!)

12. Mr. Green man

13. Polocatfan

14. DimentioFreak

15. ThaFanned

16. Andrew

17. Wait-who was supposed to go here?

18. Riku's Music Lover

19. Shane

20. NinetailsGirl09

21. AvnVKai

22. Shade Blade

23. Sean

Devin

Sophia0944

jessi girl18024

/

1) www . Homestarrunner . Com reference. I'm a big fan of the website. Watch the 'first time here' video (Google it if you can't find it on the home page. The button is pretty small.) to get a general gist of it. To understand Boogie and Flippy's costumes, watch the character videos for Strong Sad and The Cheat.

2) Faedra has bad online spelling/grammar. Whether this is a joke or on purpose, I'm not sure.

3) Pyrite (aka Fools Gold) is a mineral very similar to gold, but there are several key differences/flaws in pyrite which don't exist in gold. This includes texture, weight, and a few others.


	19. Treasure Hunt pt 3

Hey, guys. It's me. Sorry I haven't updated this in so long; I've been really busy with school, and my sister has been hogging the computer a lot. I also have some even worse news:

I have to end the fanclub.

My mom says that it's time I stop spending all of my time playing stupid, childish video games, and start growing up.

So, thank you for all of you faithful readers and club members: I'll never forget you.

...Yeah, that was all a total lie; I'm keeping the Fan Club alive!

/

A/N

\

Starlll: Happy Veteran's Day!

Boogie: How could you have a HAPPY Veteran's Day?

Starlll: What do you mean?

Boogie: Think about it: Veterans are people who have gone through war. They have spent years of their life fighting, getting shot at, and hanging in inches from death. And when they get back, they find that nothing is the same. They feel cheated, robbed, and terrible. How could you find that HAPPY?

Starlll: ...Right. Sorry, Sad Veteran's day.

Boogie: What? Are you saying that it's SAD that people who went through absolute Hell to defend our country LIVED?

Starlll: No! No! Stop contradicting me!

Boogie: I can't help it! I'm a Veteran!

Starlll: ...You are?

Boogie: Yes I am! I served in the Aztec war! ...On the Aztec side.

Starlll: ...Wow. You're REALLY old.

Boogie: ...Says you.

Starlll: ...Well, anyway, I'm going to go write the chapter now.

Boogie: You do that. I'll be busy getting respected because today is Veteran's day.

Starlll: Oh, right: RESPECTFUL Veteran's day!

/

Treasure Hunt Pt. 3:

\

"The two brothers and one Arachnid stalk through the cave, never relenting. They had already been disappointed once, and spirits are down, but they have nothing to lose!-"

"Except for our lives, my wife, my life insurance, my car, my house, my go kart, my Bintendo Zii, my Talk show, and my family fortune." Mario interrupted.

"Don't interrupt me... wait, since when do you have a Talk show?"

"On the Public Access channel. I do it every Saturday. ...You've never heard of it?"

"...Maaaaaybe..." Luigi said, awkwardly.

"What? I advertised it on the back of the phone book!" Mario said, pulling a phone book out of his pocket and showing a picture of himself next to a random Toad on the back. "Come on! That costed a lot of money!"

"...I really don't use phone books anymore." Luigi said, backing away.

"Stupid..." Mario mumbled, kicking a rock.

Nigel rolled his eyes, and climbed to the top of the tunnel they were in. A wall rolled into the pathway they had just came from, blocking off their escape. Mario and Luigi began shoving the the wall, trying to move it. It wouldn't budge.

"HOW DID THAT EVEN HAPPEN?" Shouted Mario, trying to burn it down with his fireballs.

"Stupid plot holes!"

/

After roughly half an hour, Mario and Luigi gave up on taking down the wall. They couldn't head back, and that was that. Nigel took the lead, using his eight eyes to scope out any strange movement. Only he had noticed that so far, they hadn't been attacked by anything.

The tunnel twisted further and further, generally getting deeper and deeper. They had no real measure in how deep they were, exactly, but Luigi would have guessed a few dozen feet underground. He would be off by a few hundred feet. They had been traveling at a downward pace for nearly an hour now, and you could feel the air getting thicker and thicker. It was rare that they didn't get a breath of air without any dust in it.

Luigi, deciding to experiment, kicked a rock to see how long it would take to reach the bottom. He heard it chip against the ground, sliding downwards. It kept sliding down, gaining speed, gaining gaining and gaining. It kept going. The rock hit another rock and bounced into the air, still moving forward.

Luigi felt something hit the back of his leg.

"Ow!" He shouted on reflex. He felt for what hit him. It was the rock from earlier.

Luigi tried to figure out what happened. He had thrown a rock down, then a moment later, it hit him in the back. His mind failed to understand how that happened. It occurred to him for a moment that maybe he was near the center of the earth, and it looped around in the gravity and got behind him. Luigi shook off that idea, realizing just how deep he would really have to be in order for that to happen.

He searched for another explanation, but he couldn't think of one. So, Luigi decided to see for himself.

"Stay here for a moment." Luigi said to Mario and Nigel. "I'll be right back." He ran forward.

Luigi started running, letting his long legs do the work. He knew that he was faster than Mario. He had been a part of the track team when he was in high school.

Well, at least, he had joined the track team for about a week, but he was bullied out of it. Most of the football and soccer team had it in for Luigi. And Mario. And Toad. And Peach. Well, not really Peach. She was popular, until she started dating Mario. Then she was just caught in some neutral point, not popular, but also not an outcast.

Luigi smiled. High School felt like it was so long ago. Toad had just came out of the closet, Mario got that part-time job at a restaurant, and Daisy... Daisy...

Luigi shook his head. He had broken up with Daisy. Well, actually, she broke up with him. Stupid prom night... Luigi had never gotten over Daisy. He missed her.

Thud.

Luigi ran into Mario, both of them falling down.

"OW!" They both shouted, simultaneously.

"What in the name of the Shine Sprites just happened?" Luigi asked, rubbing various areas which had gotten hurt.

"I have an idea." Mario suggested. "I think that this is like the everlasting stairs from that time when Bowser took over Peach's castle."

Luigi stared at him.

"...You know, she invited me because she baked me a cake?"

Luigi stared at Mario.

"...I had to jump into all of those paintings to get stars, which unlocked doors?"

Luigi stared at Mario.

"COME ON! IT WAS MY FIRST GAME ON THE N64!"

"Yeah, I think you forgot to invite me. Again." Luigi said, glaring at his brother.

"Oh. Whoops. Sorry, bro. Anyway, there was this one part with some stairs that just went on forever. You had to get a certain amount of stars to get to the top." Mario explained. "...So, anyone seen any stars laying around recently?"

"...Actually, I have another idea." Luigi said. "You needed stars to get to the top that time. But this time, we're going down. So we need to get RID of stars!"

Mario thought about it for a moment, then nodded. He threw a couple of leftover stars away, losing them in the darkness of the tunnel. Luigi got rid of the few green stars that he had found from a different adventure, while Nigel just watched, amazed.

"Okay, I think thats all." Luigi said, tossing his last star over his shoulder. Mario nodded, and the three continued on. Eventually, the tunnel evened out, and they could move onto the next section.

\

"...So, Luigi?" Mario asked his brother.

"Yeah, bro?" Luigi replied, hoping that this wouldn't turn out to be another 'I broke your blah blah blah'.

"...I had a question..." Mario said, awkward. "About Daisy."

"...Oh. Go ahead..." Luigi said. This was worse than a 'I broke you blah blah blah'.

"...Why did you two break up?"

Luigi didn't answer.

"Luigi? Please, tell me. Why did you two break up?"

"..."

"Luigi?"

"Hey! Somethings coming up!" Nigel shouted to them. "They're attacking us! They're-" Nigel was cut off, being dragged into the darkness.

/

Starlll: Cliffhanger! Dun-dun-daaaah!

Flippy: Hey!

Starlll: Oh, right! I forgot about the Co-Host challenge! Let's see the results!

\

Contestants:

Pax the Dreamer

Solaris Prime

Questions:

Who is, without a doubt, the most awesome guy around?

Aside from Starlll, who is, without a doubt, the most awesome guy around?

What are you expecting for payroll?

What is your favorite Luigi Moment?

Why do you want to be my Co-Host?

Are you willing to be made fun of?

How do you feel about the new curtains?

Now, for a voice check, sing a song!

Now leave a review!

/

Solaris Prime's answers:

1 & 2) Both has the same answer, but only certain people will agree with me. Therefore, I won't say aloud. Failure** to use the 1****st**** Amendment: -5**  
3) A constructive review on some of my stories, but I don't have to have it. I'm fine either way. **No Payroll: +15**  
4) When in Super Paper Mario, Luigi was brave enough to battle Demintio (forgive any misspelling) one on one. I couldn't help but say, "Go Luigi!" **Supporting Luigi: +10**  
5) It would give me something else to do. **Getting out of the Hypothetical House: +5**  
6) Not without a fight. (Pulls out Judgment Keyblade (fanfiction story weapon (yet to be fully revealed))) Failure** to be made fun of: -20**  
7) Curtains? What curtains? **Not reading my cues: -5**  
8) Get back to me later. I have a video from July 4th for that. **Making me get back to you later: -5**

9)** Review Size: +2**

Total Points: -3

\

Pax the Dreamer's answers:

1: Me! Huzzah, narcissism! Narcissism**: -5. Then again, it would be fun to write... actually: +5**  
2: See above answer.  
3: I'm totally willing to work for free. **Working absolutely free: +10**  
4: I'll tell you once I write "The Legend of the Dream Keeper: The Lord of Nightmares". **Withholding information: -10**

5: I dunno. Bored. ** No specific reason to join: -5**  
6: Only if you are, too. **Leveling the playing field: -3**  
7: Oh honey, they look FABULOUS! **Reading my cues: +5; That voice: -75**  
8: Okay. *Sings so terribly, I shatter all the glass in the area* **Making fun of yourself: +10**

9: **Review Size: +60**

Total Points: -3

/

Starlll: I don't believe it! It's a tie! Well, looks like we're going to have to do... BONUS POINTS!

\

Solaris:

Awesome name:** +5**

Speaking in rhymes **+5**

Your name is still awesome: **+5**

Reading since the beginning: **+5**

Pax:

Already appearing multiple times: **+10**

Once having a spectacular Truth or Dare story: **+10**

Losing Said spectacular Truth or Dare story: **-15**

Reading since the beginning: **+5**

Being REALLY fun to write: **+1**

/

Starlll: Amazing! Pax the Dreamer wins by one point! (Lifts Pax's arm into the air) We have a WINNER!


	20. Silicon's Other Adventure With Nokami!

[Fun Fact: This is the only chapter in ULF written on Microsoft word. All the others were on Open office.

Fun Fact: This is actually Silicon's second adventure of this nature. The first one takes place in the Story 'His Name is Mudd 2', and is made up of several short scenes at the end of each chapter.]

_Pax: Awesome! I'm in the Author's Notes! Hi, everyone on !__  
__Starlll: DANGIT, PAX! I'm supposed to go first! Cut!_

___Starlll: That's better. Okay, take it away, Pax!__  
__Pax: *Looks up from DS* Not now, I'm about to level up my Flaffy. Five more minutes.__  
__Starlll: You give that Flaffy a nickname?__  
__Pax: I don't DO nicknames... well, except for my Misdrevus-__  
__Starlll: Well then too bad! (Snaps fingers and Pax's DS explodes)__  
__Pax: ...YAY! Now I can buy a new one with the warranty! Honestly, the top screen was really getting on my nerves. Thanks, dude!\__  
__Starlll: Any time! I'd break anything for you! Including your arms, if we don't get on with it!__  
__Boogie: Yay! I won't get hurt this chap-__  
__Starlll: Not so fast! I can hurt two people at once! Watch-__  
__Pax: Wait! Can I?__  
__Starlll: Depends. What are you destroying?__  
__Pax: Who else? *Eyes Boogie evilly*__  
__Starlll: ...GO FOR IT! (Tosses Pax a stick of dynamite)_

___[Censored, via the department of Not-Scarring-Children-For-Life]_

___Starlll: WHAT? Censored? What the [Censored, via the department of Not-Scarring-Children-For-Life]? We can't censor things! The children of the world need tiny toys that they could accidentally swallow with sharp, plastic edges! We need to toughen the children of the world! At this rate, we'll NEVER grow into the enormous overlords which shall one day dominate the entire universe! Commence hacking, Pax!__  
__Pax: Yeah yeah. *Pulls out laptop* CENSOR THIS! *Begins hacking* Though, you know, I think this may hurt __  
__101__  
__0101__  
__1001010101___

_Pax: ...WHAT THE HEY WAS THAT!__  
__Starlll: Wait a minute... (Tries to swear) Sonuvab...b...bat! Oh my cheese! They're CHANGING the swears! Talk about adding insult to injury!__  
__Pax: No, this is insult to injury... wait, I can't do that, now can I? Wait... if they're changing us, who's to say they won't start changing our ACTIONS? And then the actions of all our readers! And then once they have us all under their control, the MAN will force us to all obey his every wish! They'll move from America to the other countries, and soon the whole WORLD will belong to... to... THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MON-__  
__Starlll: Stop! (Slaps Pax) We can't just sit around talking about it! We need to take action! Bloody action which shall scar children and make them tougher!__  
__Pax: And by that, you mean sit around and make someone else do it for us?__  
__Starlll: ...Well, yeah. I thought that went without saying. SILICON!__  
__Silicon: Yes, sir?__  
__Starlll: Go take down the Department of Not-Scarring-Children-for-Life! And Take one of Pax's OC's with you!__  
__Silicon: Yay! Yes, Master!__  
__Pax: First, we must select an OC. (We're suddenly in a white room, and bookshelves speed by, full of my OCs)__  
__Starlll: ...No WAY do you have more OC's than me! Holy crud, I need to make more OC's! But I'll do that later. Go back to selecting.__  
__Pax: Okay. (Hums as I pull out Kid in Pokemon outfit) ...nah. (Throws him behind back, pulling out a crazy looking guy)__  
__Crazy guy: Wanna play a game?__  
__Pax: No. (Throws him behind me) Let's see, let's see... Ah, here we go! (Pulls out spunky 12 year old girl dressed as a Gerudu) Haven't used you since the failed Sword of Time RP!__  
__Nokami: Put me down before I break your arm.__  
__Pax: Okay. (Drops her)__  
__Starlll: That reminds me; Use Thomas sometime soon. __  
__Mirror-boy/Wes/Thomas: [Starlll's first OC ever, capable of Shape-shifting powers] Yes! Finally!__  
__Nokami: Fine. But I'm expecting a reward.__  
__Pax: I'll let you live.__  
__Nokami: That's been used on me before. You don't scare me.__  
__Pax: __You want to do this for me...__  
__Nokami: *In monotone* I want to do this for you...__  
__Starlll: Okay! Now give Nokami a bio, and let's do this!__  
__Pax: Okay! *Pulls out giant piece of paper*__  
__-__  
__Name: Nokami__  
__Age: 12__  
__Gender: Female__  
__Race: [Human] Gerudu__  
__Weapon of choice: Hidden daggers in hair__  
__Pros: Agile, can stare down something twice her size without even flinching, can use magic to summon fire.__  
__Cons: If she's touched by water, the spot it touches is burnt. Prolonged submerging to water causes her to die.__  
__Appearance: About the size as Toon Link, dressed like the elite Gerudu fighters. Dark tan skin, and absolutely GORGEOUS. Well... to the kids and pedophiles at least.__  
__Bio: The youngest leader of the Gerudu, she's kind to her people, but absolutely HATES men. The only one that has ever gained her trust was Link. After joining with him, they used the power of the Sword of Time to travel through time and save the world from Ganon... but, that's a story for another time.__  
__-__  
__Pax: How's that?__  
__Starlll: It's okay. The one thing that concerns me is that she HATES men. I mean, ONLY hates men. Why can't she hold animosity towards them, or-__  
__Pax: One word, Starlll; Sexist.__  
__Starlll: ...No, you Don't get it, I'm ENCOURAGING the sexism. __  
__Pax: So you LIKE sexism, punk! How about racism, you terrible excuse for a human! THE WORLD'S BAD ENOUGH WITHOUT SICKOS LIKE YOU SCREWING EVERYTHING UP! WHY CAN'T WE JUST IGNORE SEX AND SKIN COLOR AND GIVE PEACE A CHANCE!__  
__Nokami: Because men are horrible excuses for life and the world would be better off if Women could reproduce asexually.__  
__Pax: Well put, Nokami.__  
__Starlll: ...I'm encouraging it for the comic value, Nok.__  
__Nokami: I'm letting it slide this time, BOY, but call me Nok again and I'll rip out your eyes and shove them down your-__  
__Pax: OKAY SO let's go save the world, shall we?__  
__Starlll: Aw... I wanted to hear the rest of the threat! But okay, go for it! (Shoves Silicon and Nokami into a small closet-sized probe)__  
__Pax: FUN FACT: I made up Nokami before I even learned of this game, but take away the N, and you have Okami, one of the greatest games to hit the PS2.__  
__(Probe takes off)_

___Silicon: (Forced back-to-back with Nokami) Sup?__  
__Nokami: Touch me in any way other than this forced closeness, and I'll rip your head off and shove it down the hole in your throat-__  
__Silicon: For crying out loud, I'm EIGHT. Besides, is ripping things out of places and shoving them into other places your ONLY threat?__  
__Nokami: No. *Lights hand on fire with magic* I can also burn you alive.__  
__Silicon: Really? I can use Force Crush! (Clenches hand into a fist, and the probe is instantly made smaller) …Sup?__  
__Nokami: This is why I hate men.__  
__Silicon: You hate men because they make probes smaller?__  
__Nokami: Hey, if you're eight, you like games, right?__  
__Silicon: Depends on the game.__  
__Nokami: Let's play the quiet game. Whoever talks first is shoved out of the probe.__  
__Silicon: Okay! Ulp! Whoops! I lose! ...Where's the door, I'll show myself out...__  
__Nokami: ...sonofab[Censored via the Department-of-Not-Scarring-Children-For-Life] (Probe crashes)_

___Silicon: (Hopping up and down) This is so awesome! This is just like the time when Master were on Geonosis, taking down a Droid-making factory. Stupid Republic Commandos (1) took all the credit, though..._

___Starlll: Unfortunately, Pax had to step out for a while, so I'll be entertaining you! (Puts on a top hat and a pair of tapshoes) (Is about to start tapdancing, but stops in mid-tap) Oh, wait, he's back! Okay, back to the story!_

___Nokami: Oh joy, we're here. Who's butt do we get to kick first?__  
__Silicon: I dunno. I figured you'd know! Okay, only one thing to do!__  
__Nokami: Pretend we didn't find anything and go home? __  
__Silicon: Good idea, but no! We do the time warp! It's easy! It's just...__  
__It's a jump to the left!__  
__Take a step to the right!-__  
__Nokami: I don't dance.__  
__Silicon: Too bad! (Starts forcing her through the steps)__  
__Put your hands on your hips!__  
__And bend your knees in tight!__  
__It's the pelvic thrust!__  
__(When they do the last step, they're struck by lightning, and warped to the Department of Not-Scarring-Children-For-Life)_

___Silicon: Wasn't thank a blast?__  
__Nokami: Remember what I told you about touching me?__  
__Silicon: In all honesty, I don't generally listen to people when they're threatening me. Keeps morale up.__  
__Nokami: Yeah? How about when they're BURNING YOU TO DEATH? (Lights hands on fire, but is cut off by Ninja Warriors from the Department of Not-Scarring-Children-For-Life busting in.)__  
__Silicon: I'm sorry, what?__  
__Ninja A: *Starts speaking in Japanese*__  
__Ninja B: Hey! That is a gross stereotype! Not all ninjas are Japanese!__  
__Nokami: Oh, so you're NOT Japanese?__  
__Ninja A: No, I just like speaking in Japanese.__  
__Silicon: Me too!__  
__Nokami: Sonofa[Censored via the DNSCFL. Hitting FF writers where it hurts__]_

___Pax: That's actually a pretty good slogan. Remind me to steal it once we destroy them.__  
__Starlll: I like it! Pie?__  
__Pax: Depends. Do you WANT me to be running on the walls in a sugar high?__  
__Starlll: ...Would that make your writing more random and funny? If not, take the Blue pie. If you take the Red pie, than you can see just how far the Rabbit hole goes.__  
__Pax: …(Eats both pies at once) Yum!__  
__Starlll: Oh no! Secret unlocked! He took the purple pie! What does that do-_

___Silicon: I feel a disturbance in the Force...__  
__Nokami: And the fact everything inverted colors and flipped gravity didn't tip you off?__  
__Silicon: Huh... I wouldn't notice; I usually see stuff like that. Weeeee! (Floats around in the Zero Gravity)__  
__Nokami: ...what in the world have you been smoking?__  
__Silicon: I don't smoke! Who do you think I am, General Grevious? (Grevious breathes raggedly in the background)__  
__(Sonic and Jet race in Zero Gravity)__  
__Sonic: You're too slow!__  
__(Two Captain Falcons appear)__  
__Both Captain Falcons: Show me your moves!__  
__Captain Falcon 1: Falcoooooon...__  
__Captain Falcon 2: PAWNCH!__  
__(Two Falcon Punches connect, causing a planet-shattering explosion: _

___Later, on a different planet:_

___Nokami: (Wakes up) Oh, my head... why do I get the feeling something epic just happened, and-WHY ARE MY CLOTHES CHARRED!__  
__Silicon: (Standing over her, completely unhurt) We just survived a major explosion. It could be worse. We could have to (Sings) DO THE TIMEWARP AGAIN!__  
__Nokami: NO WAY. NOT FOR ALL THE RUPEES IN THE WO-__  
__Silicon: Okay. No need to shout. All you have to do is say no, Miss Threatens-People.__  
__Nokami: … (Twitch) Okay, you know what? This Author's Note has gone on LONG ENOUGH! This is enough to be it's own freakin' story! (Pulls out remote) __  
__Silicon: Ooh, that's a nasty twitch. You should get that looked at. But good idea!_

___Pax: SHE WOULDN'T!__  
__Starlll: Hey, I already planned for this to be it's own separate chapter. "Silicon's other Adventure", in reference to "Silicon's Adventure" From 'His Name is Mudd 2'.__  
__Pax: No, I mean she's going to CHANGE THE CHANNEL ON US!__  
__Starlll: No! Wait! Boogie still hasn't been visibly hurt ye-_

___Barney: Hello, kids! I'm Barney the Dinosaur! Zippidy doo, I love you-__  
__Starlll: *Claws his way between channels* BOOGIE! GET IN HERE! __  
__Boogie: Yes, sir-__  
__Starlll: Yah! (Begins slaughtering Boogie in front of all the children watching 'Barney the Dinosaur)__  
__Pax: Well, looks like my work here is done. If you need me, I'll be RPing with Jasmine. Call me when we reach the end Author's Notes! (Poofs away in puff of smoke)__  
__Starlll: Later.__  
__/__  
__A/N__  
__\__  
__Starlll: Well, this is the end Author's Notes. Not like we ever actually ended the beginning notes in the first place. So... yeah. By the way, for anyone who noticed, Yes, my trademark "/'s and \'s between line breaks have been replaced by bars. Am I sad about this? Yes. But, hey, you know what they say: When your cohost closes a dash, he opens a... thingy...__  
__Silicon: (Wearing a gold tooth and a hooded jacket) This goes out to my hood! WORD OUT!__  
__Nokami:-__  
__/_

_\__  
__1) One part of the game 'Republic Commandos' involves destroying a droid factory._


	21. Sorry but Our Story is in another Castle

A/N

Starlll: (Getting dropped off by a cop) Whew, thanks, bro!

Cop: Don't mention it!

Starlll: Say hi to the kids for me. (Turns to the camera) Oh, hey there. Pax couldn't help write this chapter because after that last chapter, we were sent to prison for:

A) Taking down a major corporation

B) Writing a chapter entirely in script form

C) Pirating Barney's TV show

D) Violently hurting another person on a children's show

Starlll: Well, I was let off early because I Force Controlled a few guards to do my bidding, but I couldn't get Pax out just yet. So, while he's rotting away in prison, time for the next (and quite possibly final) chapter of... The UNDERGROUND LUIGI FANCLUB!

Silicon: Yes it is.

Starlll: ...What the hell did you just do?

Silicon: What?

Starlll: I'm supposed to get the first and last words of every chapter! It's the way it works!

Silicon: Sorry, do it again.

Starlll: No, I can't shout 'UNDERGROUND LUIGI FANCLUB' again, because the moment is already over-oh, hey the camera's moving again!

/

[Feels good to use slashes again...]

\

Disclaimer: I do not own nor profit off of the Mario franchise. It belongs mainly to Shengru Miyamoto, my mortal enemy.

/

"HIY-YAH!" Shouted Mario, karate-chopping a monster which lunged out at them from the shadows. He grabbed it by it's collar-bone. "Where you from?" He shouted.

"Wh-what?" It asked, able to speak English.

"What? Never heard of it before! 'They speak Italian in 'What'?"

"What?"

"ITALIAN. The language I'm speaking right now!"

"What?"

"SAY WHAT ONE MORE TIME! I DARE YOU! I **DOUBLE** DARE YOU!(1)"

"Woah, bro! Don't interrogate him like that!" Shouted Luigi, pulling his brother off of the monster.

"Oh, sorry..." Mario said, helping up the monster. "I just got carried away."

It was actually a boy. Who lived miles underground. And waited to randomly jump out at people.

"Hiya!" He shouted, roughly eight years old. "I'm Silicon! Nice to meet ya'!" He shook Mario and Luigi's hands vigorously, then all eight of Nigel's legs.

Silicon led them deeper underground.

"Say, what'd you say your names were?" He asked..

"It's-a me, Mario."

"Nigel."

"I'm-a Luigi."

"Lu-lu-Luigi?" Shouted Silicon. Emoticons could not express his joy. Nor words. He yanked his arm and dragged him to the end of the tunnel, and into a giant room with a bunch of people sitting in a circle.

"I like his green hat..." Said a man with a name tag reading 'Masterofhearts1313'.

"I like his overalls..." Said a person labeled 'Solaris Prime'.

"His mustache is SO much better than Mario's..." Michaiah.

"His green shirt TOTALLY brings out his eyes..." -Dream Scheme-

"His name is just SO Italian!" -Paper-Luigi-66

"He can dance like Elvis!" Shade Blade

"HE HAS A GREEN HAT!" Riku's Music Lover

"I just did that one!"

"OH, SORRY!"

"His capacity to forgive." Faedra

"His romance with Daisy..." Mr, Green Man

"His Fanfiction account..." Polocatfan

"His movies..." DimentioFreak

"He's the bomb-omb!" ThaFanned

"If I was an island, then he would be the seagull that swoops over it!" Andrew

"That didn't even make any sense!" No name tag

"He can sing!" Shane

"He's a plumber!" Ninetailsgirl09

"He has money to burn!" AvnVkai

"He can catch ghosts!" Sophia0944

"He has so many cool things about him!" Jessi girl18024

"And together we make..." They all said together. "THE UNDERGROUND LUIGI FANCLUB!"

\

Starlll: (Walks in wearing a bathrobe and a towel over his hair) Oh, hey. What are you doing here? Yeah, it's over. What, they can just drop you off in Rockey Horror Picture Show, but **I** can't? Okay, fine, I'll fill in some plot holes. Happy?

/

Many months later:

\

Luigi sighed, laying on a hammock. Mario had his toe shot off, but they managed to sell the story of a fanclub living underground to the newspaper for a ton of cash, which was enough to pay off the red man's debt. The Club members were all sent to therapy for the next 10 years, but it was worth it.

He had money, starred in his own adventure, and even wound up with a fanclub, but something was missing. He knew that there was something. That something was Daisy.

/

A long time ago, back in high school:

\

_Luigi was wearing a goofy blue tux as a joke for Daisy. It was the night of the senor prom, but they didn't wind up going to the dance. Instead, they just got into the limo and drove until they hit the coast. They spent hours just staring at the stars, talking._

_They were in love. They both knew it. Neither of them said it. That was because in just a few years, Luigi would be in college. Daisy wouldn't be. They knew they would have to break it off. They just didn't expect it to be so hard._

"_Daisy?" Luigi asked._

"_Yeah?" She turned her head._

"_...I was thinking, all this time, we kept thinking we would have to break up-"_

"_Please, let's not talk about that tonight."_

"_But I had an idea. I was thinking, maybe, if we had something that kept us together..." Luigi hesitated, digging into his pocket. Out came a tiny box._

"_Oh my god..." Daisy managed to get out._

"_Daisy, will you marr-" That was all Luigi managed to get out before Daisy started to shake her head. Luigi put the box back into his pocket and they drove back to their hometown, the silence hanging over them. That was the last conversation they had together for the next eight years. Then he decided it was enough._

/

Starlll: Draw from that what you will. 'Then he decided it was enough'. Six words which leaves the ending completely up in the air. But really, this time I mean it: I'm done writing this. I'm sorry to fans, but this collection of one shots is now coming to a close.

\

/

\

_Fin_

/

To Witty, who I hope is feeling better by now.

\

/

The last interview:

Answer these questions yourself:

What was your favorite fanclub moment?

Why did you decide to read this?

Do you love Luigi any more or less from this?

Do you think you'll walk away from this fanfic different than before?

Do you really need a fifth question?

\

I'm sorry, but our story is in another castle.


End file.
